Why millennials are shunning their families to spend Christmas with friends

FORGET spending Christmas with your family. More and more young people are ditching tradition, and spending the big day with friends. And why not?

The rise of the orphans’ Christmas

IN EARLY December the nagging calls from home start.

Parents with grown children will lead out with the presumptive “when you’re home at Christmas” rather than if, wistfully picturing all their progeny decorating a tree or gathered round the piano singing carols like they do in It’s A Wonderful Life.

Next it’s the guilt-tripping and blackmailing “please come, granny might only have a few Christmases left you know,” and “don’t forget who’s paying for your useless film degree”.

The truth is that many 20-somethings prefer to eschew the big traditional Christmas with their families, either because they don’t like them very much or because they can’t be bothered with an interstate trip home, and would rather spend the day with friends.

This Christmas, Melbourne cinema manager and Coffs Harbour escapee Harry Thompson plans to be living it up in his Fitzroy share-house by taking a long bath.

“Christmas exacerbates loneliness,” says Harry, “it makes people feel like outsiders, like they’re desperately alone. There’s all this pressure and it brings out the worst in people. The whole holiday is deplorable; everyone buys too many gifts and too much food. You can just picture this nice white family with a thousand presents stacked as far as the eye can see and nobody is actually happy. As soon as it finishes all the supermarkets are just full of all this rotting meat, all those animals that died for nothing.”

Harry Thompson is going to be spending Christmas in the bath. It looks pretty nice actually. Picture: Harry Thompson.

“Really it’s not that I hate my family,” said Harry, “I just can’t afford to go home right now.”

Often preferring his own company at this time year, Harry told us “I hate Christmas so much that one time I packed my bag with a bottle of vodka and an avocado and went for a solitary eight hour bike ride.

“Then me and my mates drank martinis and danced to Beyonce in the loungeroom all night long. Hospo workers aren’t allowed proper time off work at Christmas, so we all band together and get wasted.”

When you move halfway across the world you can build a new family based on values instead of blood. If it happens you share a fondness for awesome tats, sunnies and vintage sportswear all the better.

Brit émigré Linzi Moroney, a hairdresser at Toni & Guy in Melbourne, won’t be making the trip back to ol’ Blighty this Christmas, preferring to stay in the sun and the spotlight.

“We’re getting a big group together on Christmas Day,” says Linzi, “we’ll all have dinner together and do a Secret Santa. Then we’ll drink lots of rum and hit the beach!”

Linzi Moroney and her fiance won’t be going to back to England this Christmas. Picture: Linzi Moroney.

Meanwhile Linzi’s fiance Danny Greet, bass player of band Trouserforce will be rocking out with his new musical family, rehearsing for a post-Xmas show at Whole Lotta Love on December 28th.

And fear not carol singers, there is still some fleeting Christmas spirit in among the young and hip. Jetsetting ad exec Anna Martinen may spend Christmas in a different place each year, but always brings plenty of tinsel and cheer.

“I have many families,” says Anna, “last year I was with my adopted family, my best friend and her parents have basically adopted me. This year I’m staying with close friends, and your friends can be your family too. We’re going to combine Estonian Christmas traditions and have a two-day feast.”

Anna Martinen spends Christmas in a different place every year. Picture: Anna Martinen

Sometimes at Christmas one good friend is all you need, even for that negative-nancy Harry. “My best Christmas,” he says fondly, “I went out to a country house to stay with a friend, because she has this big conservatory with glass on every side. We ate a whole wheel of cheese and watched the BBC series of Pride and Prejudice and Sense and Sensibility. After a couple of days of that we’d forgotten all about Christmas and had started talking like Jane Austen.

“Would you care to take a turn around the garden?”

And if you get really stuck for something to do this holiday season, dust off your mistletoe belt buckle because Christmas speed dating is a real thing. Yikes.