Biggest work Christmas party fails

THINK you got messy at your last Chrissy party? There is a long list of people who have really messed up at their office end-of-year drinks — but one man wins hands down.

PAUL Brown won’t forget his work Christmas party in a hurry. He lost his job in IT after drunkenly urinating over a balcony in Sydney’s Darling Harbour on to couples dining in a restaurant below.

Andrew Lawrance was a police officer in Yamba, NSW, but it didn’t stop him taking the festive frivolity too far, attaching a bottle opener to his “Prince Albert” genital piercing and using it to open beers. He received a formal warning for his “party trick”.

Damien McDaid was fired from his engineering job in Fremantle, Western Australia, after he started a fight at the Christmas gathering, swore at the general manager and pushed his fully-clothed boss into a pool. And Melbourne kickboxing trainer Somchai Chimlum lost his job for telling his employer his wife was sick so he could attend a competitor’s end-of-year party.

But Stephen Keenan takes Australia’s prize for the wildest Christmas party behaviour, pulling out all the stops at a 2014 function for a road maintenance contractor in Sydney.

Former police officer Andrew Lawrance received a formal warning for attaching a bottle opener to his piercing and using it to open beers at the work party.

He told a senior manager he didn’t know to “F*** off mate,” before going on an expletive-ridden rant about management, telling a colleague: “All those board members and managers are f***ed, they can all get f***ed. Kevin Badger [a contract manager] is a c***.”

He asked a junior female colleague: “Who the f**k are you? What do you even do here?” and told another, “I thought you were a little b**** but you know you’re OK and I like you.”

Mr Keenan informed a female colleague he wanted her number but was afraid he would get rejected, and told a male colleague who tried to join them, “I’m talking to her now, f*** off.”

Later, he unexpectedly kissed one colleague, inappropriately touched another on the chin and told a third: “My mission tonight is to find out what colour knickers you have on.”

These are just some of the Australians who have paid the price for seriously overindulging in the seasonal spirit. We’re all ready to let loose and celebrate at this time of year, and for some it’s too easy to cross the line.

“It’s unfortunately the case that when freeflowing alcohol is involved at Christmas parties, it can often result in people doing things they regret,” Slater and Gordon lawyer Aron Neilson told news.com.au. “You wake up with the hangover that doesn’t go away, and you can lose your job.

“Gripes and grievances at the manager, people let it all out.

Kickboxing instructor Somchai Chimlum was fired for skipping his work party to attend that of a rival gym.

“We see constant examples of things employees post on social media getting circulated. People insulting the boss, saying they’re not a good manager or what they’d like to do to them. If it’s not OK to post at 11.30am, it’s not OK to post at 11.30pm.”

Sally Carter was on the other side of the fence. As the only female staff member at her Sydney construction equipment rental company, she was excluded from the work Christmas function so her colleagues could invite a topless waitress. She successfully sued for sexual discrimination.

Along with aggression, inappropriate sexual behaviour can be a major issue when people overindulge at Christmas celebrations. “Touching people inappropriately on the dancefloor is a classic example,” said Mr Neilson. “Whenever there are festivities, people lose their inhibitions. Just exercise common sense.”

In a landmark case, Wolmar v TraveLodge in 1975, a housemaid at an ACT branch of the hotel twisted her ankle, fell over and broke her leg at the Christmas party. The judge ruled she was entitled to compensation because the average office worker would regard attendance at the annual party as part of the job.

So remember, no matter how much fun you’re having, you’re still officially at work.