When should you break up with a TV show?

A TV show is like a relationship — you invest years of your life into it. And just like a partner you’re no longer into, it’s really hard to walk away.

HOW do you know when to break up with a TV show?

A wise workmate of mine recently made an analogy that breaking up with a TV show is like ending a long-term relationship.

You’re no longer into it but you’ve invested so much of yourself — you know almost every aspect of their lives, their family, their history and you’ve spent years being immersed in their world.

After three, four or five years together, it’s so hard to let go, even when every logical bone in your body tells to walk away, that it’s no longer fulfilling or giving you the same joy it used to.

We break up with shows for so many reasons. One colleague told me he broke up with Downton Abbey after Matthew, a main character, died. Another told me he ditched The Walking Dead after four seasons because the storylines became repetitive.

I know not one, but two people who’ve said goodbye to Game of Thrones, the most hyped-up series of this decade. One said it jumped the shark for him because of all the “bad decisions” the writers made, nominating the Sansa rape scene as his tipping point. Another said she was sick of the violence, beheadings and how the female characters kept getting smashed, emotionally and physically.

There’s only so much suavely dressed men walking with purpose I can take.

Last year, I decided to stop watching Suits after the first episode of season five. It had been a few months since the previous season wrapped and that first episode back was make-or-break for me. I’d started to go off it a couple of years before but I thought the time apart might have worked some magic — that I would have missed it and would welcome its return.

But 42 minutes of power-walking and the constant “Will Mike finally get caught?” dithering and I was done. The writers were toying with me and I felt exploited. It just wasn’t worth the $43 season pass on iTunes. Relationship, over.

It’s not always that easy. I am a loyalist — if I make it past the first season, I will usually stick with it until the end, even if the show has gone off the rails and no one is watching it anymore (or, like me, they wouldn’t admit to watching it anymore). I stuck with Weeds for all eight seasons, Dexter for eight seasons, White Collar for six seasons, Californication for seven seasons, Entourage for eight seasons (!) and The Tudors for four seasons. Some weeks, it really felt like mental flagellation.

I stuck with True Blood for seven years even though I started to hate it after two. When HBO renewed the show for a final season, my disappointment was palpable — I didn’t want to watch it anymore but I couldn’t tear myself away. And I should have, that finale was one of the worst I’ve ever seen.

There was a raft of shows that I stopped watching because I’d missed a few episodes and then just never caught up — Family Guy, Cold Case, House — but it wasn’t a conscious decision. That was more inertia.

Will they, won’t they? Ugh, I don’t care.

The first show I ever intentionally broke up with was Dawson’s Creek when I was a teen. I tired of the Joey/Pacey/Dawson love triangle, and after Joey and Pacey sailed off at the end of season three, I told myself I wasn’t doing this again the next year. And I didn’t. Five or six years later, when the DVDs came out, I thought I would give it another go. I got to the exact same point in the rewatch and broke up with it again — it wasn’t meant to be, I was never meant to see Busy Phillips join the cast.

Then there are the unsuccessful break-ups. Like a smoker trying to quit, I gave up on Scandal twice. The first time during the height of the B613 madness and again when Olivia Pope was kidnapped. Both times, it lasted about a month. I’d find myself in a weak moment of boredom and I’d light up again. Or, to stay with the dating analogy, I’d jones for an ex and pick up the phone for a booty call. Hooked again, but feeling dirty.

But there’s the flip-side — getting back with a show after a rough patch and totally loving it again. I urge anyone who gave up on Homeland or The Mindy Project in its early years to take another look. A mate of mine pleaded with me to give Suits another go but I remain steadfast on my decision not to.

With so many amazing TV shows at the moment (plus, you know, other life stuff), who has time to stick with something that you know is bad for you, that doesn’t nourish you mentally or emotionally? We should only make time for the things that make us happy, things that we genuinely look forward to and doesn’t drain or annoy us, even if we’ve sunk years of our life into it.

With that in mind, I have a Dear John letter to write to Shonda Rhimes.

What TV shows have you broken up with and why? Let us know in the comments below or on Twitter @wenleima.

Third time lucky.