James Weir recaps And Just Like That episode 10 | finale

It’s the surprise appearance Sex And The City fans were hoping for. And in the reboot’s finale — we got closure. James Weir recaps.

WARNING: Spoilers ahead

Samantha Jones makes a surprise sorta-appearance in the finale of the Sex And The City reboot — her tense relationship with Carrie changing more dramatically than Miranda’s hair colour at the end of the episode.

Right up top, let’s just flag the things we won’t be getting closure on during the final instalment of And Just Like That’s debut season. Steve. Carrie’s book. And Big’s former secretary — whose ominous presence at the funeral earlier in the series hinted at a dark secret that would come out later. What kind of secret? Maybe she knew of a hidden love child Big had. Maybe that love child would turn out to be the groovy bohemian jewellery designer Lisette who suddenly moved into Carrie’s building! Turns out, the secretary holds zero secrets and she’s just someone who possesses a very sinister energy.

JAMES WEIR RECAPS: Read all the recaps here

As the finale begins to play and I sip the pre-mixed Cosmopolitan that I bought at a suburban discount liquor outlet, I get to thinking... If you were forced to listen to one podcast for the rest of your life — and the only choice was between The Joe Rogan Experience or Che Diaz’s X, Y & Me — which one would you choose?

I’d rather listen to Burger’s sleepy-sounds machine.

Carrie and the private school teacher go on one final date and it ends with a kiss on the stoop of her brownstone. The kiss is… fine. Just … fine.

Caroline slumps up to her apartment and frantically calls her real-estate-agent-turned-Samantha-replacement Seema to talk about the meh kiss, even though it’s past midnight.

Seema answers, but only pretends to listen to her friend’s problem because she’s a busy adult who’s trying to enjoy a fulfilling life of her own. After 20 seconds, she fobs Carrie off and returns to having sex with the hot guy in her bed.

Finally, this show is starting to enforce friendship boundaries. For far too long, ‘90s TV series made it seem like it was acceptable to call your friends at all hours of the night to rant about trivial inconveniences the moment they spring up.

If it’s past 7.30pm, you’re on your own — don’t bother calling. I have a job and Gilmore Girls repeats to watch.

And thank god Seema hung up. As Carrie was telling her about the kiss, we started to cringe out of fear she was gonna try make the phrase “zsa zsa zsu” happen again.

We really need to start that petition to get Seema a spin-off.

Because Carrie didn’t get to have her 2am phone rant, it’s forced on Miranda and Charlotte the following day over brunch. They patiently listen to their friend declare that she believes she’s being haunted by the ghost of Big. It’s around now we zone out and begin to wonder when Miranda started wearing track suits:

Che is clearly responsible for this.

Remember when we feared Che’s Comedy Concerts? Well, we’re ambushed with something worse: A Che Music Concert.

Please don’t sing an original. Please don’t sing an original.

Che invites all their friends and family to a bar and performs a song before announcing some big news.

“Yours truly is going to California,” they yell into the microphone. “Hollywood called, bitches! I’m making a pilot!”

We cut to Miranda and watch in slow motion as she thinks of the life she gave up — sitting on the couch with Steve every night while grazing on junk food platters.

Miranda gave up junk food platters for stupid zsa zsa zsu.

The news is a punch to the gut for Miranda. She blew up her entire life for Che — and now Che’s ditching her to go film a sitcom? They don’t even make sitcoms anymore! She aggressively pours tap water into a crystal glass and slams it back, pretending it’s something alcoholic.

Relax, Rambo — Che’s taking you to LA, too.

The AJLT writers are still trying to make us believe that there’s a genuine friendship building between Carrie and her podcast co-host Jackie. He invites her to a party and it winds up being his surprise wedding but we don’t care because we have absolutely no investment in this character. It’s all a way to get Carrie and the X, Y & Me executive producer in the same room so he can pitch her the idea of doing her own show.

“You have that voice,” the EP gushes.

Well, it was honed over six years of pun-filled voiceovers.

Carrie’s chuffed at the compliment. And if the AJLT writers still let her do her trademark voiceovers, maybe they’d get her to say something like … “Later that night, I got to thinking about podcasts. Sometimes, in life, our automatic response is to think we pod-can’t — when, just maybe … we pod-can.”

The EP wants to work one-on-one with Carrie and, honestly, the things I’d do to him in a soundproof podcasting booth would make Samantha Jones blush.

Is that a microphone or are you just happy to see me?

Somewhere along the way, we realise it has been about a year since Big died and Carrie still hasn’t scattered his ashes. She decides there’s only one place to do it: Paris.

Personally, I’d like to have seen Big’s ashes scattered in Napa, just so Carrie could re-use her “if you’re tired, you take a Napa” pun while tossing his ashes over a vineyard.

But she’s really committed to this Paris idea. She buys a plane ticket, jets over and walks to a bridge to scatter the ashes while wearing something timeless, understated and completely appropriate.

Grief makes people do weird things.

Once she gets rid of Big’s pile of dust, she pulls out her phone and tries one last time to bully Samantha into making an appearance on this damn show.

Throughout the series, Carrie has been reaching out to her former friend, who now lives in London. Samantha’s slowly started to respond to the messages and, tonight, she takes the bait.

“I’m in Paris. Want to meet for a cocktail?” Carrie types.

“How’s tomorrow night?” Samantha replies.

Of course, we don’t ever get to see Samantha. And while we appreciate the closure we’ve been given on the fictional friendship, there is a small part of us that wishes Samantha had typed back: I’m sorry. I can’t. Don’t hate me.

Twist: This isn’t Samantha’s number anymore and it’s just a random person responding to Carrie’s texts.

And Carrie’s not the only one dealing with life’s big moments. Back in New York, Miranda has started dying her hair again. This is my favourite story arc of the season.

It was a raw, nuanced and restrained performance from Miranda’s hair.

Of course, Carrie’s journey doesn’t end in Paris. We catch up with her back in Manhattan, where she’s launching her own podcast: Sex And The City. It’s an interactive show where callers can phone in with their problems and have Carrie offer her wealth of experience as a dating expert.

One caller is particularly upset after a break-up and is desperate for advice. “What do you think happened?” she asks.

Carrie shrugs. “I have no idea.”

After the show, she walks into the elevator with her EP and they aggressively make out.

Why? Because she pod-can.

Twitter, Facebook: @hellojamesweir

The most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with … the executive producer of your podcast.