James Weir recaps The Bachelorette Australia 2016: The finale

THE most brutal moment in last night’s Bachelorette finale left one of the contestants doubled over in pain as Australia’s heart broke for him.

IT WAS the decision nobody wanted to make. But Georgia had to.

And unlike the little girl from the Old El Paso commercial, “Why don’t we have both?” was not a legitimate suggestion.

As Georgia’s reminded us twice a week for the past six weeks on The Bachelorette, “I’ve given up my career for this”. On a mission to find love, she’s given the flick to 14 other bozos.

But with two beautiful boys left, she hit a snag. She liked both. We liked both. But she could have only one.

In Georgia’s words, Lee’s a “tall gorgeous guy”. Roger that.

But he’s so much more. He can also pull off a cuffed jean and a slip-on loafer like nobody I’ve ever seen before. It’s a truly underestimated quality in a partner.

And what about Matty?

“Our relationship’s been a slow burn,” Georgia says. I know she means this in a good way, but I don’t think anyone wants to be looked up and down by the one they love and be told: “This was definitely a slow burn.”

Regardless, Matty has the sweetness of a younger brother and the enthusiasm of a puppy.

But it wasn’t enough to save him on Thursday night’s finale. As Georgia delivered her decision, Matty was heartbroken. So was Australia. And so was Georgia.

Six weeks ago, when Richie chose Alex instead of Nikki on The Bachelor, fans lit their hashtags on fire and chased Richie through Twitter feeds around the nation. But this time around, there was less hostility. There’s a happiness for Lee and Georgia. But witnessing Matty’s heart break was brutal to watch.

In the lead up to her decision, they all fly to Singapore and both boys meet Georgia’s family so her dad and sister can help her make the choice. They prove to be completely useless.

Matty is first in line to meet Georgia’s dad Chris and sister Katie.

“So jumping straight in ...” says Katie, who looks like she could be an extra in Grease 2. She then fires off some sharp, thoughtful questions.

“How are you with cats?” she inquires.

Maybe she said kids? Nope. She said cats.

We don’t even get to hear how Matty is with cats before he’s whisked away by Georgia’s dad for an underwhelming interrogation. The conversation circles around about Matty living in Sydney and Georgia living in Melbourne. Matty says they’ll find a way to make it work and he’ll eventually move. Dad doesn’t buy it.

Lee’s then marched in to deal with the father-sister adjudication team. He’s at an advantage because he’s wearing a lovely blue shirt that really makes dem peepers pop.

Total dreamboat.

They all chill on the Balinese-style couches in the hotel lobby and Lee won’t shut up about how amazing and determined and beautiful Georgia is.

But Katie smells a rat. She’s not buying what Lee’s selling and she wants to blow this case wide open.

“I have been able to call out a bad egg in the past,” Detective Katie says confidently, cleaning the lens of her magnifying glass.

“The vibe I did get from him is he’s very smooth,” she says suspiciously. “I get the impression he’s saying the right things (and) he knows he’s saying the right things. Saying the things he thinks we want to hear — saying the right things for this situation.”

“I’m a little bit to the negative side of the fence,” she adds.

In her one-one-one time with Lee, we all look on through the one-way mirror as she interrogates him.

She accuses him of laying down some slick moves and being a smooth talker. But Lee proves her wrong.

“Love’s not a word I take lightly,” he tells her. “I’m yet to tell her this — and this will be our little secret — but the truth is, I’m falling head over heels for her. The truth is I’m absolutely falling in love with your sister.”

Katie begrudgingly puts her magnifying glass away.

Back on the couches, Georgia asks her dad and sister what they think of both the boys and who they prefer.

They prove completely useless. Katie, who was prepared to criticise each boy’s cat handling abilities earlier, has decided she doesn’t like having opinions anymore.

Georgia gets huffy because no one will make the decision for her. Then Katie gets huffy at Georgia’s huffiness and tries giving her an opinion without giving an opinion at all.

“Ultimately it is your decision and we’re trying to give you as much info as we can,” Katie says, not giving any information at all.

“I don’t know if I can give you an A or B answer,” she adds vaguely.

Their dad eventually admits he prefers Lee and Katie finally admits she likes Matty.

This does not give Georgia a definitive answer and both Katie and the dad are sent back to Melbourne for being useless.

Go home Katie.

Last night, Matty declared his love for Georgia and he reiterates his feelings during their final date at a butterfly sanctuary.

“The only speed bump we need to get over is making sure she picks me because I absolutely love her,” he says. Oh no. This is a red flag for upcoming heartbreak.

“I think I’ve always been honest with you, absolutely every word,” he tells Georgia while winged insects crawl on them. “I wish I could give you an idea of just how much I miss you when I’m not with you. I’m going to be absolutely devastated if it comes to an end.”

Yep. Absolutely set up for rejection.

As intimate as you can be surrounded by insects.

For Lee’s final date, it’s his mission to declare his feelings to Georgia. But he gets shady. Instead of doing something original, he just steals Matty’s idea of declaring his love while living it up in a hot tub. Only Lee one ups it by doing it in an infinity pool. Apparently these days declarations of love are synonymous with chlorine.

Anyway, in the infinity pool, Lee lets it all out.

“There’s been something I’ve wanted to say all day,” he tells her. “I’ve so fallen in love with you. I don’t want to go home without you. I don’t see a future without you. And I want you to know that.”

High off the excitement of being in a killer infinity pool, they kiss.

More glam than Matty’s hot tub.

When the big day rolls around two things become immediately clear. Roses were absolutely harmed during the making of this episode:

Really chic mulch.

And Matty is about to get dumped. Georgia tells Osher she has to say goodbye to someone who makes her feel loved without judgment and her decision becomes immediately obvious.

Like Nikki six weeks ago, Matty is up first to hear the verdict. It’s not a good sign.

She builds up with some nice memories of their time together before she stabs the knife in.

“I genuinely adore being in your company,” she says. “I came here to fall in love. And I have. But it’s with someone else.”

Matty takes a step back. He bends over and grabs his knees. He doesn’t vom.

Hurls get the girls.

We actually witness his heart breaking and it’s brutal. It takes a few moments to sink in.

“I guess it’s ... I’m absolutely devastated,” he manages. “I wanted to meet someone here who I could spend the rest of my life with and I have but … it just sucks you don’t feel the same way. “But I’m so happy you found what you’re looking for. And I’m sure you’re gonna make Lee the happiest man in the world. And I wish you guys all the best.”

Even Georgia wanted to write an upset Tweet about her decision.

He’s heartbroken. Georgia’s heartbroken. And so are we. No he’s not slick and tall like Lee. And he can’t pull off a cuffed jean and leather loafer combo like Lee can. But he was really sweet and he absolutely loved Georgia and I feel like he’s a small child who’s spent ages building a sandcastle and now some jerk’s knocked it over.

But look on the bright side: At least his passive aggressive older sister won’t kill Georgia for relocating him to Melbourne.

As they say: Every time a younger brother is left heartbroken an older sister gets her wings.

They hug and Matty delivers perhaps the most heartbreaking line of the whole ordeal: “I really don’t want to let you go.”

In his car monologue, he holds it together.

“Yeah it hurts. Hurts a lot. I don’t know. Kinda can’t help but feel I just found one in a million and then I lost it,” he says. “I kinda wish that I didn’t love her right now. I wish you could flick a switch and stop having those feelings towards someone. But I guess the positive you can take out of it is she’s found the man of her dreams even though it’s not me I’m glad its happened for her.”

After Channel 10’s makeup department rush the set to fix Georgia’s now-ruined smoky eye, she’s ready to end this circus and start her life with Lee.

“From that first date it all fell into place. And that feeling and that connection has just grown every day,” she gushes. “You make me laugh, you make me happy … you make me excited for the future. And I hope I make you feel like that as well. Because I’ve fallen so madly in love with you. I love you so much.”

And with that, Lee and Georgia begin their life together. Georgia can finally get a newsreading gig on the mainland - far, far away from Tasmania. And both of them have basically doubled their wardrobes when it comes to unisex cuffed jeans, slip-on loafers and blue chambrays.

For more thoughts and observations on cuffed jeans and Old El Paso tacos, follow me on Twitter: @hellojamesweir.

They’re happy I guess.