James Weir recaps Seven Year Switch series 2 episode 3

SEVEN Year Switch experienced its first fiery clash, with one wife dropping a truth bomb so honest it caused her husband to lose it.

SEVEN Year Switch experienced its first fiery clash on Monday night, with one wife dropping a truth bomb so honest and accurate it caused her experimental husband to flip his lid and lose control in an expletive-laced confrontation.

Michael’s a wreck after watching a video of his partner Felicity questioning whether she still loves him. While I’d describe him as an emotional mess, he says he’s an “emotional house”, but whatever.

His experimental partner Kaitlyn is confused by Michael and Felicity’s relationship. She knows things are terrible and ugly for them and she doesn’t understand why they haven’t tried therapy before this extreme experiment. Michael says he wanted to seek help, but Felicity didn’t want to. This only confuses Kaitlyn even more and she continues to pick at Michael, questioning Felicity’s motivation for choosing to enter this experiment.

Then Kaitlyn makes the most surprising, accurate and honest call we’ve heard on this show.

”I think Felicity is here maybe for the free holiday,” she says.

Only she doesn’t just tell Michael this. She also makes this know-it-all face:

‘Sorry but it’s true.’

“I think it’s BS her intentions, sorry,” Kaitlyn continues.

Needless to say, Michael — who has a known fiery temper — flips out.

“You know what?! I’m pretty sure you should just keep your mouth shut and your opinions to yourself!” he says, storming around the room with no real direction.

Kaitlyn says she knows Michael has an anger problem and this only makes it worse.

“Yeah, well, f*ckin’ don’t open your f*ckin’ mouth!” he yells.

”I’m a grown f*ckin’ man! What, do you think she f*ckin’ dragged me here like a little boy?!”

Kaitlyn doesn’t know how we got to this point.

While they make up afterwards, the seed Kaitlyn has planted about Felicity just being in it for the free Airbnb sits in Michael’s mind.

Over in another seaside mansion, Felicity is so bored by her experimental partner Mark, she starts berating him over everything. Usually we’d think Felicity is a bit of a rat, but Mark legitimately has nothing to offer and everything has a way of evening out, you know what I mean?

Being a complete troll, Felicity asks for a detailed description of Mark’s house.

When he says his crap shack is decked out wall-to-wall in movie memorabilia, she tells him it sounds disgusting AF.

“I was embarrassed, but mostly shocked,” Mark says, wide-eyed and flabbergasted.

Felicity basically goes on to call Mark a bit of a loser.

“If you’re 34 and you still have Arnold Schwarzenegger pictures in your bedroom I think he needs to be looking more at himself,” she says, mispronouncing Arnie's surname, but that doesn’t really matter right now.

She then takes a sip of her tea and looks like that Kermit meme.

‘But that’s none of my business ...’

Felicity is unimpressed with Mark and she brings this attitude along to their therapy session.

“Probably one of the main (arguments) we have is regarding cleaning up after cooking,” Mark says of his relationship with Kaitlyn, as if it’s their deepest, darkest secret.

Felicity isn’t having a bar of it.

“I know that’s not the issue. If the dishes were the only problem in my relationship (with Michael) I’d be one happy camper. I know there’s bigger issues (between Mark and Kaitlyn). It literally made me feel sick to my stomach,” she tells us viciously. And she’s not done. She has a lot to get off her chest about Mark’s dirty dishes confession.

“Like, get a house keeper. Seriously, it’s really not that big of an issue — it’s an easy fix. It made me think, ‘Is he gonna continue putting in a half-assed effort into the experiment?’ It’s seriously bullshit.”

If she had a cup of tea, she’d sip it like Kermit here again too.

Felicity says she’s annoyed Mark would play down his relationship issues in front of the therapist and says she knows the bigger, dirtier things that are going on between him and Kaitlyn.

Mark sits on the couch grinning innocently.

That’s a dirty dish-eatin’ grin.

This annoys Felicity to no end.

‘I’ll reveal your secrets.’

Last week, Johnny and Stacey Louise got off on the wrong foot and are trying to be more accepting of each other.

“Stacey Louise is a bit uptight most of the time,” Johnny tells us bluntly.

Nuff said.

Meanwhile, their real-life partners Tracey and Sarge are basically in love with each other.

They also think their persistent flirting and sexual innuendos are totally subtle. They’re not.

“You can lean over and toot my horn any day,” Sarge tells Tracey when she beeps an actual car horn.

“I hate to tell you but my pants are wet,” Tracey tells Sarge with a glint in her eye when her pants actually become wet on a boat trip.

“Would you kindly ease your way into putting your lips around my al dente pasta,” she whispers to Sarge while actually forking al dente pasta into his food hole.

This last one is awkward for everyone.

Mainly because Tracey is a lady and she doesn’t realise only boys can get al dente.

For more observations on making know-it-all faces and getting al dente in inappropriate situations, follow me on Twitter: @hellojamesweir

Sarge cops a face-full of al dente.