James Weir recaps Big Brother VIP 2021 episode 1

Meghan Markle’s brother has unleashed the trash talk on Big Brother VIP — and made one very harsh prediction. James Weir recaps.

Meghan Markle’s weird half-brother fulfils his purpose just moments into Monday’s Big Brother VIP premiere by publicly sledging the former duchess and implying he simply doesn’t know why she would cut him out of her life.

Then, just when we think he’s done with the trash-talk, there’s more. … and more again.

Obviously Meghan is the one to blame.

JAMES WEIR RECAPS: Read all the recaps here

Channel 7 execs are no doubt high-fiving. The premiere is a smash by all accounts and offers a one-two punch of juicy confessions that’ll make headlines around the globe.

The left-hand jab is the brutal Meghan drive-by and it’s swiftly followed by a right cross from Caitlyn Jenner who declares OJ Simpson — famously acquitted of murder in 1995 — “did it”.

The celebrities are a perfect mix of highbrow and lowbrow. Or, more accurately, lowbrow and lower brow.

It goes without saying the biggest star of them all is host Kruges. She doesn’t need to be here. She’s got better things to do. Of course she’d rather be driving around town in her limousine. But she makes the big sacrifices in order to give the people what we want.

The most offensive thing about tonight isn’t even the trash talk from Meghan’s weird half-brother. It’s that Caitlyn Jenner rolls up late and leaves Kruges waiting on that dark driveway in the middle of the night. And then, when she finally deigns to make an appearance, she shuffles in wearing a maxi dress and flip flops like she’s heading down to the communal swimming pool at a family resort.

Caitlyn, pls show some respect to Kruges.

We’ve also got Donald Trump’s former White House staffer Omarosa checking in to the mansion. Apparently there’s bad blood between her and Caitlyn. Who knows if it’ll lead to drama. After all, Omarosa seems really meek. A total wallflower.

Yes, she’s posing for fake paparazzi who producers hired from a casting agency.

Australia’s favourite cheater Jessika Power is back and better than ever. And that’s not an insult — even she gladly owns up to the title that she earnt after getting embroiled in a cheating scandal on Married At First Sight.

“Ladies, lock up ya husbands!” she instructs while clamouring out of her Uber.

Inside, she immediately takes a liking to former Brisbane Lions captain Dayne Beams. Then she’s promptly summoned to the diary room.

“HE’S MARRIED,” Big Brother scolds.

Jessika’s response?

C’mon, Jessika — blimefibe us.

It’s always risky putting media identities in a small room together. They can’t help but pull power moves in an attempt to create a hierarchy.

“Bernie? Where do I know you from?” former Survivor contestant Luke Toki says to Australian actor Bernard Curry, snapping his fingers and furrowing his brow.

“Ahh … do you watch Wentworth?” Bernard replies, graciously waiting for Luke’s memory to click.

“Ah, yeah … nah, no I haven’t. I actually haven’t started that yet,” Luke shrugs.

And he never will.

Ooft. Blanked by a Survivor contestant. That’s a new low.

OK, just admit it — you’re only here for the Meghan insults. That’s fine. Here we go.

When we first meet Thomas Markle Jr, he’s perched on a velvet chaise lounge and dives right into his Greatest Hits Tour — regurgitating all the dirty Meghan stories he’s dished to the tabloids before. First up is the letter he wrote to Prince Harry, warning the royal not to marry Meghan.

“The letter that I wrote to Prince Harry was a hundred per cent honest and heartfelt,” he declares. “Meghan treats her family like she’s embarrassed of where she comes from. She’s very selfish, self-centred. I think she’s very shallow.”

Do we think Meghan and Harry are in their Santa Barbara mansion right now, watching the 7plus live stream?

Anyway, Thomas is not finished. Later on, he regales the other celebrities with more family gripes.

“Last time (I saw her) was at my grandmother’s funeral. Like, 2011. And then she took off after that anyway and went to Canada,” he raises his eyebrows as everyone eats up the drama he’s serving.

“What happened to her? Nobody can figure it out. Money changed her. Money and fame just went to her head. The thing that gets to me is the guy she was married to the first time, (movie producer) Trevor ... she just walked all over him and dumped him. That fast. After being married, (she) sent the ring back in the mail. Is that cold or what? Harry’s next. Harry’s on the chopping block next.

“All the photos prior to (the wedding) he had a smile on his face. All the ones after, he doesn’t.”

Hmm. It remains a mystery why Meghan doesn’t wanna have regular brunch dates with you.

A real head-scratcher.

There’s only one person who can top a Meghan Markle drive-by.

Good evening, Ms Jenner …

“Nicole was Kris’ best friend,” Caitlyn dives into a harrowing description of the lead-up to the death of Nicole Simpson, the ex-wife of American footballer OJ Simpson who was murdered in 1994.

“I was at Nicole’s house, two days before the murder. Obviously he did it. And he got away with it. And at one point, he even told her: ‘I’ll kill you and get away with it because I’m OJ Simpson.’

“Then Nicole relayed that to Kris at one point. And, unfortunately, she was right. We were at the courthouse and we were watching what was going on in the other room. And even after the ‘not guilty’ verdict, Kris turns around to me and said, ‘We should’ve listened to Nicole.’ She was right, from the beginning.”

It’s a horrific and heartbreaking story. A hushed silence falls over the mansion. Partly because of the chilling nature of the anecdote. But also because the rest of the Australian celebrities know they’ve really got no yarns anywhere near as interesting as the ones shared tonight.

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