James Weir recaps Big Brother Australia 2021 episode 4 | ‘It’s sh*t’: Heartbreaking eviction admission

Sonia Kruger has dragged out a tearful admission from a Big Brother contestant at the centre of a very petty feud. James Weir recaps.

Like most classic tales of heartache, vengeance and redemption, Sunday night’s Big Brother drama begins with lentils.

Well, chickpeas, to be exact — but this is Big Brother and of course none of the contestants know the difference. Anyway, these aforementioned chickpeas are added to someone’s breakfast cereal. See — already there’s tension. Putting chickpeas in cereal is just ridiculous.

What follows is a heartbreaking admission that challenges the gross assumptions we make daily. ‘Tis the power of the canned legume.

JAMES WEIR RECAPS: Read all the recaps here

To understand this complicated event, we must start at the beginning. Tilly is sitting on the couch, eating cereal.

“A lot of people think I’m a dumb blonde,” she says before scooping a spoonful of the slop into her mouth and grimacing. “This is disgusting.”

Why? What did you put in it?

“Chickpeas.”

Oh, that’s weird. Anyway, what were you saying before?

“A lot of people think I’m a dumb blonde but I’m actually smart.”

Mmhhmmm. Mmhhhm.

At first, this decision to garnish her cereal with chickpeas seems innocent. But it ends up being her downfall.

Big Brother announces yet another confusing physical challenge. The house is split into two teams and the winning group gets to nominate three people from the losing side to go up for eviction. Annoyingly convoluted rules are given and we don’t pay attention. And when the game finally begins, we don’t pay attention to that either. During these challenges, I use the free time to scroll through The Iconic and add more crap to my wish list e-cart that I’ll never actually buy.

When a winning team is eventually crowned, they must decide on which three losers to nominate — and this is where chickpea retribution is sought.

Martha’s mum is put up for nomination but only as a safe vote because everyone loves her and she won’t get axed. This strategy puts heat on the other two nominees:

1. Some random guy called Michael

2. Chickpea Tilly

That elderly influencer SJ makes no secret about why she wants Tilly out of here. She saw Tilly trying to roast the chickpeas before burning most of them and she feels personally offended by it.

“Because she used all the chickpeas and, as a vegetarian vegan person …” SJ launches into a vegan rant and we zone out again.

It’s just one setback after the other for Tilly. Last week, she bravely shared her harrowing experience with that TikTok beauty hack that left her with permanent facial scarring. And now she’s being shamed for hogging the chickpeas.

When Tilly finds out why exactly she has been nominated, she marches over to SJ and cuts sick.

“SJ! Why was I put up? (Because of) Lentils? You’re upset about the chickpeas?” she splatters before bursting into tears and running away. “If I go home because I burnt some chickpeas ...” her uncontrollable sobs begin to muffle her speech. “I burnt some chickpeas and now I’m going home!”

This is why I never eat chickpeas. Too much emotional turmoil.

With voting and elimination just moments away, Tilly does the only logical thing.

“I need to rinse my crystal!” she clutches the purple, jagged chunk of amethyst and runs into the bathroom.

Well, obviously.

While all this has been unfolding, who do you think has been comprehensively briefed about the chickpea drama and is ready to stir the pot again? This dame right here:

Stir. That. Pot.

It’s the fourth elimination ceremony of the series and the contestants have cottoned on to Kruges’ tricks. When she tries to bait them about the chickpeas, they just play dumb. Rats. But Kruges is undeterred. She asks the group point-black why Tilly got nominated.

They try to snake out of answering again by saying, “It’s not that anything’s wrong with these people-”

But Kruges interrupts like a detective interrogating a criminal. “It’s just that nobody could be bothered to save them?!” she scoffs.

We love when Kruges plays Bad Cop. She circles around the chickpea incident again with a sideways question for Tilly.

“How’s the afternoon been for you?” she smirks.

“Obviously, it’s sh*t,” Tilly sighs before unravelling. “My whole life … people look at me … like … I don’t know … I just look a bit stupid … and I always do everything wrong,” she cries.

These sobs quickly turn into a full-blown breakdown as Tilly details the pain that comes with a lifetime of being stereotyped and misjudged. And of course, at the core of all this emotion, are the controversial cereal chickpeas. “I just wanted to prove something in here for myself.”

In one final plea, Tilly looks around the room at the people who are about to vote her out of the competition and she attempts to humanise herself by tearfully reciting the names of each contestants’ spouse and children and pet.

Everyone is brought to tears. And the tactic works. That random guy Michael is voted out and Tilly is kept safe by just one single vote.

Thank God she rinsed her crystal.

Twitter, Facebook: @hellojamesweir

Just don’t eat any more damn chickpeas.