House of the Dragon recap, episode two: How I Met Your Stepmother

In a case of fiction echoing reality, the world of Game of Thrones is on the cusp of war in a small strip of sea. WARNING: Spoilers.

SPOILER WARNING: We are about to discuss episode two of the Game of Thrones prequel series House of the Dragon. If you have yet to watch it, stop reading now!

Before we dive into episode two, here’s a quick summary of where the show left off.

King Viserys’s wife and newborn son both died during the nightmare-inducing childbirth scene from episode one, leaving him without the male successor he’d craved.

After disinheriting his brother Daemon for “celebrating” the baby’s death, and banishing him from King’s Landing, Viserys formally named his daughter Rhaenyra heir to the Iron Throne. Never before has Westeros been ruled by a woman.

Viserys also told his daughter a closely guarded secret which had been passed from ruler to heir since the reign of Aegon, the first Targaryen king. He revealed Aegon had a prophetic dream warning him of a world-ending threat, which we in the audience know to be the White Walkers from Game of Thrones (which is set almost 200 years after HotD).

Aegon believed it was crucial that a Targaryen be on the throne and in a position to unite the realm against this shadowy threat when it arrived.

Read on for our recap of episode two, whose central focus was Viserys’s reluctant hunt for a young new wife. Emphasis, regrettably, on young.

(Or, if you’d rather listen to me yammer on about the episode, hit play on the podcast below.)

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A feast for crabs

We begin at a Small Council meeting, where Lord Corlys Velaryon is frustrated at the King’s refusal to intervene in the Stepstones.

The conflict there has deteriorated since its brief mention in episode one, and you may not recall the full context, so here is a brief rundown.

The Stepstones are a series of islands in the Narrow Sea, which separates Westeros from the continent to its east, Essos. They straddle an important trade route. House Velaryon, by far the biggest sea power in Westeros, has an intense interest in keeping that route open.

The islands, previously a haven for pirates and outlaws, have now fallen to something even worse. They’ve been conquered by a nasty sort nicknamed “the Crabfeeder” (because, surprise, he feeds people to crabs), who is believed to be backed by the Triarchy, an alliance of three major cities in Essos.

Corlys wants the Crown to intervene militarily and seize the Stepstones, but Viserys, a cautious and conflict-averse leader, is not keen to start a war with the Triarchy.

Geography lesson! The Stepstones are circled here. That’s Westeros on the left and Essos on the right.

As Corlys fumes at the rest of the council, we learn that Daemon has defied the King’s command to return to his wife in the Vale and has instead taken up residence on Dragonstone, the island seat of House Targaryen.

By tradition, Dragonstone belongs to the royal heir, so Daemon’s occupation of the fortress here is typically provocative.

Seeking to mollify Corlys, Viserys says he has sent diplomatic envoys to the Triarchy, and promises that the situation in the Stepstones will be settled “in time”.

At this point Rhaenyra, who has been lurking in the room as a cupbearer, interjects. She suggests sending dragonriders (herself included) to the Stepstones as a show of force.

“At least the Princess has a plan,” Corlys says.

But the King shoots her down, and then finds a reason to send her out of the chamber. The head of the Kingsguard – the elite group of seven knights tasked with protecting the royals – has died, and a new member of the guard must be appointed.

Viserys asks Rhaenyra to select the best candidate. He frames this task as a positive, but her ejection from the council meeting is an unmistakeable rebuke.

On the upside, she gets to spend some time with this handsome rooster. Picture: Foxtel/HBO/Binge

Rhaenyra ends up picking Ser Criston Cole, the knight who defeated Daemon in the tourney during episode one.

Criston is, coincidentally, an extraordinarily handsome fellow. Is this a factor in Rhaenyra’s decision? Perhaps! Horniness is always a potential motive in Game of Thrones.

But the Princess does cite a better reason: Criston is the only candidate with any substantive combat experience. The rest are, as she labels them, “tourney knights”.

This goes back to something another of the Targaryens, Princess Rhaenys, noted in the previous episode. Westeros has been at peace for decades at this point, meaning few people alive have fought in a real war. Keep that fact in mind as the show progresses.

How I met your stepmother

We next travel to the King’s private chambers, where Viserys is showing off his super rad Lego model of Old Valyria. (The Targaryens were once among a great many dragonriding families in Valyria, before it was destroyed by a natural disaster called the Doom. All the other dragonriders perished.)

“It is truly wondrous what you’ve built,” says his one-woman audience, Alicent. Chicks dig Lego in this world, apparently. I think the army of murderous ice zombies in Thrones did less to threaten my suspension of disbelief.

Or, more plausibly, Alicent is feigning interest as part of her pimp father’s scheme to get the King into her pants.

This scene makes it clear that Viserys has, at the very least, a schoolboy crush on Alicent, though I’d remind you that he is in fact a middle-aged man, and she is in her mid-teens, and oh yes, she is also his daughter’s best friend.

“You do not mention our talks to Rhaenyra, do you? I fear that she wouldn’t understand,” Viserys tells her. Of course, his true fear is that Rhaenyra would understand, and would judge him harshly for wanting to sheathe his crusty old sword in, I repeat, her childhood friend.

That face when he has a MASSIVE ... Lego collection. Picture: Foxtel/HBO/Binge

Awkwardly, the very next scene shows a conversation between Alicent and Rhaenyra in which the Princess is venting about her father’s love life. She believes, correctly, that members of the council are plotting for Viserys to remarry, less than six months after Queen Aemma’s death.

In fairness to the schemers, there is a perfectly logical reason for the King to find a second wife. As things stand, the royal line is vulnerable, as Viserys has only one living descendant. He needs to have more children to strengthen the bloodline.

“You cannot worry at the matters of lords and kings, Rhaenyra,” Alicent says, which is an interesting thing to tell the person who is next in line for the throne. One might think it is precisely Rhaenyra’s job to concern herself with such matters.

The two girls share a poignant moment reflecting on the deaths of their mothers. Then they kneel to pray – it’s noteworthy that Rhaenyra has to ask Alicent what to say. One of these characters is clearly more pious than the other.

Back to the marriage plots. Alicent’s father is not the only Small Council member seeking to use the King’s new relationship status for his own advancement.

Lord Corlys, while ostensibly apologising for losing his temper earlier, one-ups Otto in the bad dad stakes by offering Viserys the hand (and by extension, other body parts) of his 12-year-old daughter Laena.

While the King does not appear to find this idea appealing, he does meet with Laena. She delivers some pre-rehearsed lines about bearing Viserys children and all that, but seems most interested in plying him for information about the whereabouts of Vhagar, the oldest and largest living dragon.

Some essential background information: Vhagar is the last surviving dragon from Aegon’s conquest of Westeros more than a century earlier. She was flown by one of his two sisters (who were also his wives, naturally), the warrior queen Visenya.

The Velaryons are not historically dragonriders, but Laena’s mother Rhaenys is a Targaryen. That means Laena has Targaryen blood, and could claim a dragon for herself. It is obvious, from this conversation, which one she’d like.

‘May we interest you in sexual relations with our 12-year-old daughter?’

A shot of Vhagar from one of the show’s trailers. She looks vaguely like a T-Rex with wings. Picture: HBO/Foxtel/Binge

While Viserys is being peppered with questions, Rhaenyra and Rhaenys are watching from a short distance away. The former is the current heir to the throne. The latter is the woman who was passed over for Viserys at the Great Council, in the very first scene of this series.

Their conversation includes this warning from Rhaenys: “Whether it’s to my daughter or someone else’s, your father will remarry, sooner than late. His new wife will produce new heirs, and chances are better than not that one of those will be male. When that boy comes of age and your father has passed, the men of the realm will expect him to be heir, not you. Because that is the way of things.”

The lonely King

At various points in the episode, the King seeks other people’s opinions on Laena as a potential wife. Let’s tick them off quickly, one by one.

Otto says the proposal is an “overreach” from Corlys, though he is forced to concede the idea makes political sense.

Alicent does a much better job of manipulating Viserys, drawing his attention back to her.

“I’m sure she is good and kind, and that she’ll enjoy your company. As I have,” she says, with a meaningful stare. As I have! Her approach is not particularly subtle, but it appears to have the desired effect.

She proceeds to offer Viserys a gift – she’s had the little Lego model he broke earlier in the episode fixed. Behold, how she gets him! Contrast this with the stilted conversation he shared with Laena, whom he concedes he “does not know well”.

The acting from Paddy Considine is particularly interesting here. In the moment he receives and digests Alicent’s gift, there is a vulnerability that’s quite telling, and sad.

You get the sense this is a deeply lonely man, who has sunk into depression following his wife’s death. He spends his life surrounded by people who don’t truly care for him.

The small gesture from Alicent might be a cynical move on her part – it’s open to our interpretation – but from Viserys’s perspective it appears to be a rare moment of sincere kindness, of someone giving a damn about him.

Perhaps I’m reading too much into it, but in any case, keep this scene in mind later, when the King reveals his decision.

Finally we have Lord Lyonel Strong, Master of Laws on the council. Without a horse in the fight, he offers a frank opinion: “You should marry Laena.”

Also, note his characterisation of Corlys’s proposal as “a calculated reach” and “a fair play for a man of his position”. This is in direct contrast to Otto’s claim it was an “overreach”.

Lyonel has not been a prominent character in these first two episodes, but you should keep an eye on him (and his family) going forward.

That’s Lyonel on the right. Picture: Foxtel/Binge/HBO

‘Do it’: Showdown on Dragonstone

We’ll take a break from all the marriage talk now to deal with the latest shenanigans from Daemon, who has not only shacked up with his paramour Mysaria on Dragonstone, but has stolen a dragon egg. Naughty boy.

Daemon has sent word that Mysaria is pregnant, and that he intends to place the egg in the baby’s cradle. This is a Targaryen custom, the idea being to make royal children bond with their dragons from a young age.

He also wants to marry Mysaria, which is a slight problem because, as previously mentioned, he already has a wife.

It emerges later that Mysaria is not, in fact, pregnant. So what the heck is Daemon doing here? I think Viserys, of all people, gives the most plausible answer: “My brother wishes to provoke me.” In other words, Daemon simply wants attention.

The provocation works, because the specific egg Daemon stole is the one that would have been placed in the cradle of Viserys’s dead son. Tis quite the insult.

This nugget of information imbues Viserys with a bout of uncharacteristic decisiveness that lasts all of ten seconds. He announces he is going to Dragonstone himself to retrieve the egg, only to be talked down immediately.

Rhaenyra does not share her father’s indecision. Without telling anyone, she slips away on her dragon, Syrax, to confront Daemon.

Pretty. Picture: Foxtel/Binge/HBO

Rhaenyra’s arrival. Picture: Foxtel/Binge/HBO

As she arrives, Daemon and Otto are slinging insults and threats at one another on a narrow bridge beneath the castle on Dragonstone. (Note the aesthetic change from Game of Thrones, which had several scenes play out in this very same location. Dragonstone is now covered in a heavy fog, which better fits the vibe of a volcanic island.)

Otto reacts to Rhaenyra’s unexpected entrance by asking the Kingsguard to “escort her to safety”. She ignores him, strolling up to Daemon fearlessly. As in episode one, they speak to each other in Valyrian.

“I’m right here, uncle. The object of your ire. The reason that you were disinherited. If you wish to be restored as heir, you’ll need to kill me. So do it, and be done with all this bother,” Rhaenyra says at the climax of their exchange.

Daemon’s reaction is intriguing. He stares at her with a small smile on his face, as though admiring her courage. Then he turns and stalks off, relinquishing the egg without another word.

This scene is further proof there is genuine respect and, I’m afraid to say, tension of an unsettlingly sexual nature between them.

Back in King’s Landing, Viserys frets that Rhaenyra could have been killed, and berates her for leaving without his permission. She does not apologise. It is increasingly clear that father and daughter have dramatically different personalities: where he is indecisive and risk-averse, she is stubborn and bold.

Their conversation turns to Aemma, and the obligation Viserys has to remarry.

“I could never replace your mother. No more than I intend to replace you as heir,” Viserys assures Rhaenyra.

“You are the King. And so your first duty is to the realm. Mother would have understood this, just as I do,” she replies.

Her choice of words there, highlighting her father’s “duty to the realm”, is important.

The rose ceremony

Cut to another Small Council meeting, where Viserys announces he has decided to take a new wife. Corlys, bless him, leans forward in anticipation. He’s like a Bachelor contestant who’s certain the rose is coming his way. Rhaenyra gives her father an encouraging nod.

Then the bomb drops. Instead of Laena, the King will marry Alicent.

Naturally, Corlys throws a tantrum and storms out of the room, but the camera lingers on Rhaenyra’s reaction. Clearly upset, she spends several moments trying to hold herself together before she, too, flees the meeting.

‘U wot, m8?’ Picture: Foxtel/Binge/HBO

There are obvious reasons for her displeasure – imagine learning that your father has been perving on your best friend, and that she’s to become your stepmother – though the one I’d highlight is rooted in the previous scene.

Rhaenyra came to accept that Viserys had a duty to the realm and to the royal bloodline, which required him to remarry. But if he were concerned only with duty and with the best match for the realm, he would have chosen Laena, for all the reasons advanced by Lyonel earlier in the episode.

Instead he picked Alicent, an inferior match, in the full knowledge that it would p*ss off the Velaryons, weakening the Crown. He did this not for duty, but for love (or at least lust).

In Rhaenyra’s eyes, Viserys’s insistence that he could never “replace” her mother now rings hollow. She sees it as a betrayal.

The final scene shows a fed-up Corlys persuading Daemon to go to war with him in the Stepstones, in defiance of the King’s wishes. So if you were hoping for more harrowing violence in this show, rest assured, it’s coming.

MVP of the episode

Rhaenyra’s fearless intervention on Dragonstone, resolving the situation without bloodshed, was a moment of certified badassery. It was followed by, as far as I can recall, our first real taste of her character’s musical theme.

I would have liked a fresh theme for the opening credits, but nevertheless, composer Ramin Djawadi’s genius persists.

Alicent gets a shoutout for her skilful manipulation of Viserys, which was less bombastic than Rhaenyra’s moment of glory, but arguably far more consequential.

Villain of the episode

Who is creepier, the parents offering up their young daughters to a middle-aged man for their own political advancement, or the King himself for lusting after one of those daughters?

There’s a humanity to Viserys, a sadness and loneliness, that makes me feel a hint of sympathy for him. Whereas Otto, Corlys and Rhaenys are all driven purely by political motives. Perhaps they are a touch worse here.

@SamClench