Taylor Swift caught in the middle of long-running Aussie squabble

Taylor Swift has waded into an Aussie rivalry that’s been bubbling away for years – and it’s turning nasty.

We should’ve known this was coming.

Taylor Swift’s Australian (read: two-city) tour has inflamed one of this country’s most persistent rivalries, the old Melbourne vs. Sydney debate.

Swift hasn’t exactly been innocent in all this, though. She escalated matters on-stage in Melbourne over the weekend, when she uttered the words: “Melbourne, you are the love of my life.”

Of course, she was probably referring generally to crowds of adoring Swifties – but many chose to interpret her statement as a declaration of undying love for Mykis, Federation Square and cursed Ferris Wheels.

I am bizarrely invested in finding out what Taylor Swift will have to say about Sydney, after calling Melbourne 'the love of my life'.

— Dr Vyom Sharma (@drvyom) February 21, 2024

It should be noted that Swift wasn’t seen in public during the four days she was in Melbourne, outside of her concerts. There were no surprise trips to Pin Oak Court, Vermont, to meet Karl and Susan on the set of Neighbours; no exclusive dinners out on the restaurant tram. If Melbourne really is the love of her life, she must’ve had a great hotel room.

Swift flew to Sydney the day after her Melbourne concert commitments were over, preferring to spend her four-day break between touring legs in the NSW capital. Make of that what you will.

Taylor in Sydney:
- yachting around the harbour
- dinner at top restaurants
- hotel with view of the whole city
- the most shows played at our biggest stadium

Taylor in Melbourne:
- ??? pic.twitter.com/BS4wlFccfH

— L (@capitayIist) February 20, 2024

Sydney newspaper The Daily Telegraph certainly did, declaring Swift’s Melbourne concerts to be “warm-up gigs” in a front-page headline that left some international fans very confused when it circulated on social media:

The Daily Telegraph took a sledge at Melbourne.

“Does melbourne and sydney have some kind of hatred for one another bc this is so funny,” one fan tweeted, before Aussies jumped in to explain (and I quote: “Yup and everyone hates Perth”).

That front page sledge may have been a little too cocky, though, given the weather forecast for tomorrow’s opening Sydney concert: Hot, steamy and potentially very stormy. The weather is set to top 35 degrees tomorrow, with a good chance of evening thunderstorms.

Melbourne 3 perfect nights for Taylor Swift

Sydney night one - hail storm #WhoWouldHaveThought

— Julian de Stoop (@jdestoop80) February 21, 2024

Now, Swift’s open-air concerts go ahead come rain or shine – but in the case of electrical storms, public safety takes precedence. It was only last December that a storm forced the sudden cancellation of the Good Things Music Festival in Sydney’s Centennial Park, moments before the headliner was due on stage. Thousands of punters were told to evacuate and seek shelter immediately, fleeing the venue as hail pelted down on them and lightning crashed overhead.

Taylor on-stage in Melbourne last weekend. Picture: Getty

Pink in Sydney: You think this is easy to do wet? Picture: Tom Parrish

Fellow music superstar Pink bore the brunt of Sydney’s weather during the opening show of her Australian stadium tour earlier this month. Minutes before Pink’s show started, the heavens opened – and didn’t let up for the remainder of the night.

“Was it supposed to rain? No one looks prepared!” she asked the shivering crowd.

It’s hard to gloat about how superior your city is when you look like a drowned rat in a poncho. Hard, but not impossible.

Taylor Swift did 3 concerts in Melbourne but 4 in Sydney… what does that tell you?
Sorry Melbourne but SYDNEY IS STILL KING.

— 𝓙𝓾𝓼𝓽𝓔𝓭🐴 (@SaintEd61) February 19, 2024

As a Melbourne-born Sydney resident, I feel I am uniquely placed to tally the current scoreboard for the two Swift-mad cities. Here’s Melbourne vs. Sydney (Taylor’s Version):

MELBOURNE
Pros:

The biggest concerts of her entire career (96,000 fans per show)

Dry, temperate concertgoing conditions

The public transport set-up is enough to give Americans a minor medical episode.

Cons:

Concertgoers face a Melbourne-specific public hazard: 9-foot-tall AFL players.

SYDNEY

Pros:

Four shows to Melbourne’s three (320,000 fans total vs. Melbourne’s 280,000)

Outings! The harbour, zoos, restaurants. Surely Taylor’s Bridge Climb is imminent

Famous NFL boyfriend actually wants to come and join you.

Cons:
Potential for concert-ruining electrical storms

High chance of being pestered by Kyle and Jackie O staff 

Have to schlep to Homebush just to entertain the masses.

The winner? It’s too close to call. Let’s say … Canberra. They’ve got Questacon.