I was a blockbuster movie action hero for two days

I WAS invited on to a blockbuster movie set to see if I have what it takes to star in an action scene. Here’s how it went.

I WAS an action hero in a blockbuster movie for two days.

Think Sylvester Stallone. Think Vin Diesel. Now think of a 157cm entertainment writer, who until recently, had done nothing more heroic than a spin class without fainting.

Yep, that’s me.

I flew to the stunning Windsor Great Park in England to learn from the team behind the epic battles in the new blockbuster King Arthur: Legend of the Sword.
I had one mission: to do exactly what King Arthur stars Charlie Hunnam, Jude Law and Eric Bana do in those action-heavy scenes.

In my mind this would be a bit of a lark, with grunting and a few extended angsty looks, while the stunt guys and editors made me look like a medieval Lara Croft.

However, that turned out to be as far off the mark as my arrows during archery training.

(You’ll see examples of this in the video of me training below.)

There were trailers — so many trailers. There was a fully-staffed catering van. There were snacks near the catering van. There were wardrobe people. Lighting people. Makeup people. There was even someone to put on my coat if I was cold.

This was a no-expenses-spared Hollywood set up.

And at its core was a huge team of some of the best stuntmen in showbiz (you’ve seen them in Pirates of the Caribbean, Harry Potter and Game of Thrones). Capturing it all was a film crew of more than a dozen people.

And did I mention weapons? There were a LOT of weapons.

First up, I was sent to the King Arthur wardrobe department and decked out in a costume straight from the movie. I looked totally legit, but turns out layers of thin woollen fabric aren’t that cosy on an 8 degree day in a British forest.

Surely Charlie Hunnam wouldn’t have had to withstand the cold on this very set?

Lesson one: Yes, he would have.

It was just one of the many lessons I would learn across the two days.

The training was hardcore, but it was fascinating to go through the process of an action star. It’s very time-consuming. This 1-minute scene I shot took us 2 days to film and weeks to organise.

Here’s what else I found out:

Faking a realistic punch is much harder than it looks

I’ve watched at least twenty minutes of Rocky 1 or 3, or something like that, so I felt more than qualified to throw a fake punch.

Turns out ‘fake’ doesn’t mean ‘easy’. Fake fighting is much harder than it looks. It needs to visually pack a punch (mind the pun) while obviously making no contact.
So much time is spent stretching and warming up your neck, because your body is all you have to sell a brutal blow.

This is where the stunt guys really make their money. I wasn’t exactly the perfect student, but the team made me look like a total badass.

However, I never really mastered taking a punch, because who doesn’t want to duck when there’s a meaty fist flying at their face?
(They weren’t so keen on accepting this as an excuse).

This, to me, is a normal reaction.

Movie weapons are often (terrifyingly) real

“There’s no such thing as a fake bow and arrow” were the words I was greeted with by our archery instructor, Steve, before he tried to show me how to use one.

Let me tell you — knowing you could kill someone on set is highly stressful when armed with sub-par hand-eye coordination.

Same goes spears. Actors apparently use the real thing because they can’t be thrown realistically if their weight is wrong.

Mine could barely be thrown at all.

As the bow-and-arrow is authentic, a lot of time is spent ensuring the camera angles capture the moment we fired the shot, and not so much on where the shot was going.

Really mastered the art of looking cool.

You don’t need to make your own sound effects

This is more of a personal observation, but even after a polite (and then progressively more firm) reminder that the editors add the sound effects later, it’s really difficult to swing a sword without making the SWOOSH noise.

They’re very patient if the ‘star’ needs another take

I had no lines in my scene, but don’t let that fool you into thinking it was simple. So much about stunt fighting is timing your movements perfectly.

Enter shot — take two steps — pull axe from body — duck — swing into torso of bad guy — stand again — find next target — run to him — block axe — stab next bad-guy in the neck — and use second sword to fend off another guy.

Oh, and really make sure you duck when you’re supposed to or you will cop a blow to the head.

... So you really have to pay attention. And not get the giggles. Sadly, neither of these were my strengths.

Luckily, the stunt team was incredibly patient.

The shot is only done when everyone has nailed it, including the ‘star’ (me). And sometimes it took me up to 8* (*18) attempts to get right.
And everyone else — whether they’re killing, or being killed, or shouting, or running — has to redo their actions over and over again.

The log props had their own crew

I mentioned there were a lot of people on set — and these guys may have been my favourite.

In the final scene, you’ll see me throwing four logs into the air.

Well, those bits of rubber had their very own crew of two people. Every time I threw them, no one else was allowed to pick them up bar those two.
There was also a guy who’s one job was to look after the campfire.

After some strong investigative journalism, I was told by the crew that this is standard practice on a movie set — every one has a specific job to do.

I was told to “carry the fake logs” and then “act scared”... Nailed it.

Finally — it is ALL about camera angles

Thank God for camera angles.

In the final edited scene, I look like I’m totally handling all the bad guys ... but don’t be fooled.
I was not a natural-born killer (see training video for indisputable evidence), but thanks to incredibly clever camerawork I will forever be a real movie hero to all who are willing to listen.

Here’s the final product:

King Arthur will be in cinemas next Thursday, May 18.

The journalist was a guest of Warner Bros in England.