Chrissy Teigen issues lengthy public apology: ‘I was a troll’

Chrissy Teigen says she’s been “sitting in a hole of deserved global punishment” as she atones for her past as a notorious “troll”.

Model Chrissy Teigen, 35, returned to Instagram today with a lengthy message to apologise for her past cyber-bullying of Courtney Stodden, among others.

The post is also available to read on Medium.

“Hi all. It has been a VERY humbling few weeks,” she began. “I know I’ve been quiet, and lord knows you don’t want to hear about me, but I want you to know I’ve been sitting in a hole of deserved global punishment, the ultimate ‘sit here and think about what you’ve done.’”

Chrissy Teigen: ‘I’ve been sitting in a hole of deserved global punishment.’ Picture: AFP

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“Not a day, not a single moment has passed where I haven’t felt the crushing weight of regret for the things I’ve said in the past,” she continued. “As you know, a bunch of my old awful (awful, awful) tweets resurfaced. I’m truly ashamed of them.

“As I look at them and understand the hurt they caused, I have to stop and wonder: How could I have done that?”

She then addressed her bullying of Stodden, who now uses they/them pronouns, saying, “I’ve apologised publicly to one person, but there are others – and more than just a few – who I need to say I’m sorry to. I’m in the process of privately reaching out to the people I insulted.

“It’s like my own version of that show My Name is Earl! I understand that they may not want to speak to me. I don’t think I’d like to speak to me. (The real truth in all of this is how much I actually cannot take confrontation.)

“But if they do, I am here and I will listen to what they have to say, while apologising through sobs.”

Teigen targeted Courtney Stodden (pictured) in several vile tweets. Picture: Mike Windle/Getty

Stodden, 26, accused Teigen of telling them to kill themselves in private DMs after publicly tweeting that Stodden should “take ‘a dirt nap’.” Teigen publicly apologised to Stodden in May, but Stodden claimed they never heard from her privately.

Teigen continued her essay by acknowledging that she was a “troll” on social media whose behavior was uncalled for.

She explained, “In reality, I was insecure, immature and in a world where I thought I needed to impress strangers to be accepted. If there was a pop culture pile-on, I took to Twitter to try to gain attention and show off what I at the time believed was a crude, clever, harmless quip.

“I thought it made me cool and relatable if I poked fun at celebrities.

“Now, confronted with some of the things that I said, I cringe to my core,” she admitted. “I’ll honestly get sharp, stabbing pains in my body, randomly remembering my a**hole past, and I deserve it.

“Words have consequences and there are real people behind the Twitter handles I went after. I wasn’t just attacking some random avatar, but hurting young women – some who were still girls – who had feelings. How could I not stop and think of that?”

Teigen’s husband John Legend has publicly expressed his support for her. Picture: Getty

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She then confessed she wanted to be better for her daughter, Luna, 5, and her son, Miles, 3.

“John tells me almost every day how much our daughter Luna reminds him of me,” she wrote. “Every day, I try to make sure she’s all the best parts of me, all the things I aspire to be all the time, but fail at sometimes.

“And we preach kindness to her and Miles every chance we get. Will they eventually realise there is some hypocrisy there? I certainly do. But I hope they recognise my evolution.”

She added, “My goal is to be so good that my kids will think this was all a fairy tale. Not the fake good. The good that has the best intentions, the good who wakes up wanting to make her friends, family, her team and fans as happy as possible. The good who will still f**k up in front of the world but rarely, and never not growing only more good from it.”

Her husband, singer John Legend, simply commented with several love hearts on her Instagram post.

She concluded the message by asking for “patience and tolerance” as she works on herself through therapy and other avenues.

This article originally appeared on Page Six and was reproduced with permission