Actor Patton Oswalt’s heartbreaking note to late wife

ACTOR Patton Oswalt suddenly lost his wife earlier this year. 102 days later, he’s emerged from the fog of grief to pen a heartbreaking note about what he’s been going through.

Patton Oswalt with his late wife Michelle McNamara in 2011. Picture: Rex Features / Splash News

Patton Oswalt may still be stuck in the throes of grief following the sudden passing of his wife earlier this year, but he hasn’t lost hope.

“102 days at the mercy of grief and loss feels like 102 years and you have s**t to show for it,” the comedian, 47, wrote in an essay published to his Facebook page this week.

“You will not be physically healthier,” continued the actor and comic, best known for roles in films Young Adult and Ratatouille and TV shows United States of Tara and Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. “You will not feel ‘wiser.’ You will not have ‘closure.’ You will not have ‘perspective’ or ‘resilience’ or ‘a new sense of self.’ You WILL have solid knowledge of fear, exhaustion and a new appreciation for the randomness and horror of the universe. And you’ll also realise that 102 days is nothing but a warm-up for things to come.”

Oswalt with Jon Cryer and Ashton Kutcher in Two and a Half Men.

But Oswalt, whose writer wife Michelle McNamara unexpectedly died in her sleep in April, says he has been taken aback by the “new levels of humanity and grace and intelligence” he’s been shown by his 7-year-old daughter, family, friends, fans and even complete strangers.

“They will show up for you, physically and emotionally, in ways which make you take careful note, and say to yourself, ‘Make sure to try to do that for someone else someday,’” he wrote.

Oswalt also announced his plan to finish compiling the true crime book that his wife was working on at the time of her death — based on an article she wrote for Los Angeles magazine article about the Golden State Killer — and publish it soon.

“Any spare energy I’ve managed to summon since April 21st I’ve put toward finishing Michelle’s book,” he wrote. “With a lot of help from some very amazing people. It will come out. I will let you know. It’s all her. We’re just taking what’s there and letting it tell us how to shape it. It’s amazing.”

In the 2011 hit black comedy Young Adult.

And while Oswalt says he’s only in the crawling stage of overcoming his grief, he’s ready to get back to work.

“Okay, I’ll start being funny again soon. What other choice do I have? Reality is in a death spiral and we seem to be living in a cackling, looming nightmare-swamp. We’re all being dragged into a shadow-realm of doom by hateful lunatics who are determined to send our planet careening into oblivion,” he wrote, before closing with: “Hey, there’s that smile I was missing!”

This story was originally published on the New York Post and is republished here with permission.