What your uni really says about you
Classes are officially under way for Victorian university students. Check out our guide to whether your choice of tertiary education makes you elite, edgy or annoying.
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The four-month summer break has ended, O-Week is over and classes have now started for thousands of Victorian university students.
So what does your choice of uni say about you? Do people think you’re elite, edgy or just plain annoying thanks to your tertiary choice?
Read on and find out what recent graduates and current students have to say about our state’s biggest unis.
The University of Melbourne
If your parents are in finance or medicine and you grew up in Camberwell or Hawthorn, chances are you’re a University of Melbourne student.
If you’ve got relatives wondering why you needed an ATAR of 87 to get into an arts degree, you’re a Uni of Melbourne student.
Melbourne students love to talk about how they’re “really struggling” with the cost of living even though their boarding costs at Newman or Trinity College are funded by the “parentals”. Yes, it is tough to be a resident of college crescent – all those black-tie gala events really add up.
The uni’s prestigious law program is a dream if your family can comfortably afford the eye-watering tuition fees. There’s always HECS as a back-up, as long as you’re willing to be in debt well into your 40s. This is especially the case if you choose a feel-good community law career rather than a berth at a top-tier big-six corporate firm.
While the University of Melbourne is known for its intense academic focus (and insistence on respect for pronouns), its students are known for their ability to balance study with a healthy dose of on or off-campus fun.
If you are harbouring grudges against your group work peers who don’t pull their weight because they spend too much time doing pub crawls in Carlton, then you’re a Uni Melb student – and they’re about to drop out.
High cut-off score
Biomed/dental surgery 99.85
Low cut-off score
General studies, Dookie 53.4
Notable alumni
Julia Gillard, Germaine Greer, John Landy, Julian Assange, Cate Blanchett, Cathy Freeman, Jana Wendt
Good Universities Guide
Overall experience rating 72.8%
Graduate salary (average) $29,300
Full-time employment rate (after four months) 65.5%
Monash University
If you’re running late to class because it took you so long to get to campus, then you’re a Monash student.
Chances are you’ve just spent 40 minutes trying – and failing – to find a park.
If you spend more on Myki top-ups than Uber Eats, then you’re a Monash student relying on public transport to get to Clayton.
Monash used to be the poor cousin of Melbourne Uni, but this hasn’t been true for a while, mainly due to the high number of law students from some of Melbourne’s poshest elite schools going there.
Going to Monash is just fine, as long as everyone knows you could have gone to Melbourne and chose not to.
In fact, some students prefer it over Melbourne, particularly because they can do a double degree.
At Clayton, the law library is the place to hang out, just hope no one works out you’re not actually doing law.
Many people don’t realise, but there’s a second Monash uni city campus in Caulfield. It’s full of journalism students who picked their course because they thought it would be easy. It isn’t, as they soon discover.
High cut-off score
Radiography and medical imaging 98.15
Low cut-off score
Diploma of Tertiary Studies Education, Peninsula 50.35
Notable alumni
Adam Bandt, Daniel Andrews, Brendan Gale, Carolyn Cresswell, Peter Costello, Bill Shorten, Steve Vizard
Good Universities Guide
Overall experience rating 72.9%
Graduate salary $49,900
Full-time employment rate 77.6
RMIT
If you come from a family where going to university is expected, but deep down you’d rather be doing something arty, then you’re an RMIT student.
RMIT is the trendiest uni around, with a sea of fashion-forward students who spend their days scrolling through Pinterest and dreaming of careers in fashion and textile design at the Brunswick campus.
Sometimes they even attend lectures, although the lure of the Sydney Road op shops, record stores and ethnic eateries can often be too strong for them to ever get around to finishing their third-year edgy fashion range.
If you’re a computer whiz who’s hoping to leverage your 20-hour a day gaming addiction into paid employment, you’re an RMIT computing science student.
If you spend your Saturday nights competing in the Uni Cup for Esports dominating in Counter-Strike, Global Offensive, Super Smash Bros Ultimate and League of Legends, you’re definitely an RMIT student.
While RMIT’s city base may not have that “campus feel” like the others, students have Melbourne’s bustling CBD as their playground.
If you’re lucky enough, you may even have a few classes in the old Magistrates Court buildings on the corner of Russell and La Trobe St or kick the footy in the Old Melbourne Gaol courtyard.
For aspiring media students, RMIT is the place to be, with multimillion-dollar podcast, TV and virtual reality studios free for everyone with a student card and half an idea.
High cut-off score
Law/ professional communication 86.65
Low cut-off score
Legal practice/ paralegal associate degree 40
Notable alumni
Paul Little, Paul Stoddart, Neil Clerehan, Travis Frimmel, Christine Envall, Steven Hooker, Lydia Lassila.
Good Universities Guide
Overall experience rating 74.1%
Graduate salary $46,800
Full-time employment rate 69.1
Deakin University
If you tell people what uni you’re going to and they answer: “Why didn’t you go to Melbourne or Monash?” then you are a Deakin University student.
If you’re a sports science or sports management student, chances are you are at Deakin Burwood, spending weekends coaching at private schools and playing club sport. Rest assured, you’re one of the coolest kids on campus and your course will give you lots of time to dream about your place in the next AFL draft.
For years, Deakin was known as the “university of the third choice” – a riff on the University of the Third Age.
These days, Deakin is outgrowing this image, and is setting standards for graduate employment, if the ads on the buses are anything to go by.
Deakin students tell us getting to Burwood – the main campus- can feel like a major undertaking, but at least you’re not spending hours on complex enrolment processes like other universities.
The spacious Waurn Ponds campus near Geelong is a boon if you’re already located in the area, and is within striking distance of the great – and not so great – bars of Little Malop Street.
High cut-off score
Medical imaging, Geelong 94.6
Low cut-off score
Nursing, Warrnambool 52.05
Notable alumni
Jaclyn Symes, Candice Wyatt, Dave Sharma, Jimmy Bartel, Rodger Corser, Leigh Sales, Livinia Nixon, Chloe Shorten.
Good Universities Guide
Overall experience rating 81.8%
Graduate salary $49,300
Full-time employment rate 76.1
Swinburne University
If you get to campus via train and arrive 20m from your lecture theatre, then you go to Swinburne.
If you go to class then leave straight away, you go to Swinburne.
The lure of Glenferrie Rd is that strong students don’t always hang out on campus. Why go to the 24-hour Latelab when you could be at the Lido Cinema?
The uni is well regarded for its industry placements, especially in courses like engineering, aviation, computer science, screen production, animation and astrophysics.
The Hawthorn campus is also home to the Advanced Manufacturing and Design Centre, with plenty of cutting-edge tech.
Niche, prestigious and full of serious students and post-grads, that’s the Swinburne vibe.
The only downside of Swinburne’s main Hawthorn campus is the influx of private school kids hanging out in the Glenferrie Rd fast food joints, vaping and filming each other having fights.
Lower fees, lower cut-offs and a smaller campus are drawcards of Swinburne. There’s no chance of parking there, so don’t bother trying. Ever.
High cut-off score
Film and TV (honours), Hawthorn 82.05
Low cut-off score
Health and Science Unilink diploma, Hawthorn 40.03
Notable alumni
Gillian Armstrong, Mark Beretta, Madeleine West, Sidney Nolan, David Hodgett, Niki Caro.
Good universities guide
Overall satisfaction rating 79.2
Graduate salary $48,300
Full-time employment rate 73.3
Victoria University
If you tell someone where you went to uni and they respond, “Oh, where’s that?”, then you go to Victoria Uni.
Crowded in by hip RMIT, uppity Melbourne and Monash and something-for-everyone Deakin, VU is still trying to find its feet.
Just remember, those who attend Victoria University are the happiest in the state, with current students giving the uni an overall positive rating of eight stars out of ten.
VU students are also more organised than those from every other uni because of the Block Model offering one subject at a time for four weeks.
While every other uni student is waiting until week 12 to cram in their assignments, VU students have knocked off almost one assignment off a week.
They also spend the least time getting to and from uni because, for those in the western suburbs, it’s close to home.
VU students don’t dress as fancy as University of Melbourne or Monash students because they prefer comfort over style.
There’s also a chance they have at least one class with a professional sports player during their time at VU, thanks to uni partnerships with the Western Bulldogs Football Club and Melbourne Victory Football Club.
High cut-off score
Physiotherapy, Footscray Park 98.5
Low cut-off score
Nursing, St Albans 60
Notable alumni
Curtis Stone, Pia Miranda, Andy Griffiths, David Southwick, Karen Andrews, George Sotiropoulos
Good Universities Guide
Overall satisfaction rating 78
Graduate salary $48,000
Full-time employment 63.7
LaTrobe University
If you tell someone where you go to uni and they ask if there’s a sale on at the Nike outlet at Uni Hill, then you go to LaTrobe Uni Bundoora.
Chances are you’ve lost your car in the carpark in your first year, copped at least one parking ticket in your second year and by your third year are still wondering what’s up with the uni’s interesting choice of sculptures.
You’re not shy to wear your La Trobe Student Union merch on a cold, wintry day and have Lost on Campus on your home screen for any last-minute room changes.
When you’re not studying, the Agora is your go-to meeting place, where you’re spending big at IGA Xpress, Bachelor of Coffee or Charlie’s Kebabs.
Alumni would remember Fuel Juice & Soup Bar, House of Cards and the Post Office – all of which are still at the campus today.
Those at the Bendigo campus are the happiest of La Trobe students, with great country scenes to enjoy and fast food chains are only a stroll down the road.
If you’re a LaTrobe student, your degree is a lot more affordable than those at the University of Melbourne or Monash, and you’ve got cheap sneakers as a bonus.
High cut-off score
Dental science, Bendigo 99.9
Low cut-off score
Diploma of Teaching Education, Bendigo 40
Notable alumni
Jacinta Allan, Ahmed Fahour, Patricia Edgar, Kerryn Harrington, Bill Kelty, Virginia Trioli, Radek Sali, Ben Carroll.
Good Universities Guide
Overall satisfaction rating 73.5
Graduate salary $49,000
Full-time employment 76.1
Australian Catholic University
If you’re Catholic but not that Catholic, then you’re an ACU student.
If you are sick of answering questions about your uni’s religious affiliation – not to mention Joe de Bruyn’s offensive views about IVF, abortion and same-sex marriage – then you’re an ACU student.
Console yourself by focusing on ACU’s average graduate salary- a whopping $58,600.
If you spend your on-campus hours hanging out at The Track watching sport, playing basketball on the rooftop or lounging around on the green near the new St Teresa of Kolkata Building, then you’re an ACU student.
ACU students are a happy, sporty bunch, more likely to be grabbing a coffee on Gertrude St than crawling out of the Napier Hotel at 3am, but sometimes the Brunswick St nightspots are too hip to ignore.
ACU is known for great clinical placements thanks to the hospital partnerships, but other graduates say they end up shopping around trying to find their own work placements.
Play your cards right at ACU, and you could end up in the uni’s campus in Italy, Campus di Roma.
It’s just three kms from the Vatican. Depending on your religious views, this is either a good thing or a bad thing.
High cut-off score
Psychology honours, Melbourne 91.5
Low cut-off score
Biomedical science diploma, Melbourne 50.4
Notable alumni
Martin Dixon, Justin Madden, Meg Lanning, Morris West, Ellie Cole,
Good Universities Guide
Overall experience rating 77.1%
Graduate salary $58,600
Full-time employment 79%
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