Pills made me a predator: Matt Lodge opens up on the brutal truth of his night of shame
DISGRACED Brisbane Broncos forward Matt Lodge has broken his silence to apologise to his American victims and opened up about his battle with prescription drugs.
NRL
Don't miss out on the headlines from NRL. Followed categories will be added to My News.
DISGRACED Brisbane Broncos forward Matt Lodge has broken his silence to apologise to his American victims and opened up about his battle with prescription drugs.
On the eve of his return to the NRL, Lodge labelled his New York rampage “disgusting”, saying a cocktail of alcohol and sleeping pills turned him into a predator he didn’t recognise.
New York couple Ruth Fowler and Joseph Cartright have slammed the NRL for supporting Lodge, claiming he has shown no remorse, nor tried to pay a cent in a $1.6 million damages bill issued against him in a US civil lawsuit.
But in a candid interview with Fox Sports presenter Yvonne Sampson, to be screened on Wednesday night on the League Life program, Lodge expressed deep regret for the “brutal” attack on his victims.
The 22-year-old hit back at suggestions he never sought counselling and says while he can understand the firestorm of criticism, Lodge wants to win back the hearts of NRL fans.
Told the victims described him as “terrifying, aggressive, erratic and violent” on the night of his rampage in October 2015, Lodge responded with candour.
“I’d have to agree with them,” he said.
BADEL’S BUNKER: How Broncos botched Lodge affair
GAME’S BEST: Cam Smith hails Matt Lodge’s potential
“It’s not the person I think I am, but looking at that it’s clear that I’m off my head in that video (of him punching Cartright before being arrested at gunpoint by New York police).
“It’s pretty embarrassing and upsetting watching it.
BELOW: read an extract from Matt Lodge’s full interview with League Life
“I’d have to agree with them and I am sorry for it.”
The Courier-Mail understands Lodge consumed eight sleeping pills with alcohol in the lead-up to his New York attack. During his night of shame, Lodge followed two women, telling one: “This is the night you die”.
Lodge says he could not recall most of the night in question due to his abuse of prescription drugs, an addiction he says he has since addressed.
“I don’t (have addiction issues) anymore but I was probably going down the path of abusing and being a bit reckless with substances, yeah,” he said.
“I don’t really remember the night and I can’t comment on how it happened or why because I’m still trying to find that answer for myself.
“I don’t remember that whole period which is the scary thing.
“I woke up the next morning handcuffed to a bed crying because I didn’t know what had happened.
“From what the lawyers and court proceedings said, it was a pretty brutal night.
“Some of those facts I wouldn’t agree with and didn’t happen but it’s still completely the wrong thing and pretty disgusting behaviour.
“The question gets asked — what if it happened to my family? I’d be filthy, of course I would be.
“If I could take it back I definitely would but that’s impossible now.
“I am really sorry to them. It’s not only affected their family, but everyone around me as well. It’s embarrassing.”
It was revealed last Sunday that Lodge pleaded guilty to assaulting his former girlfriend in August 2015 - just two months before his New York indiscretion.
The matter was prosecuted in Parramatta Local Court and Lodge was initially found guilty with a conviction.
Lodge appealed to the district court and was found guilty without conviction. He was placed on a two-year good behaviour bond.
“I own that whole part,” he said.
“I don’t support violence against women. I did the wrong thing. I’ll punish myself for it. I’m definitely against it.
“I can admit I have never hit or assaulted any women.
“We took that (appeal) to the district court and it got overturned. I’ve got no criminal conviction or record of causing any harm to any female.
“That’s something I want to be strong about — I didn’t hit anyone.”
Lodge insists he isn’t running from his US victims and has undergone intense rehabilitation, including being alcohol-free for more than two years.
“I don’t think I’m trying to escape it,” he said.
“I couldn’t be more sorry to them. They didn’t deserve any of that behaviour. I’ll do anything I can to make up for it.
“But since I got back, I really have turned things around.
“I’ve done outpatient programs and done counselling. It got mentioned that I hadn’t done any counselling, but I did a year-and-a-half worth until I had to move away from Sydney and I couldn’t see my regular counsellor that I built trust with.
“I still keep in contact with them. I’m on the right path now.
“I guess I understand people aren’t going to support me, especially at the moment, but I’ve got a goal to do more right things than I’ve done wrong,
“Hopefully later down the track in my career people can maybe support me or see I have done some positives.”
YVONNE SAMPSON GOES HEAD-TO-HEAD WITH BRONCOS FORWARD MATT LODGE
YVONNE SAMPSON: Terrifying, aggressive violent and erratic — that’s how the victims in New York described you when that CCTV came out, that vision of you on that frightening rampage. Who do you see when you look at that vision?
MATT LODGE: Yeah, I would have to agree with them. It is not the person I think I am, but looking at that, umm, clearly I am off my head in that video and it is pretty embarrassing and upsetting watching it. So I would have to agree with them and, like, I am sorry for it.
SAMPSON: Off your head on what?
LODGE: A combination of sleeping pills and lots of alcohol.
SAMPSON: And do you have addiction issues?
LODGE: I don’t anymore. But I was going down the path of abusing it and being a bit reckless with substances, yeah.
SAMPSON: Because the actions of that young man in that video they look brutal. You look like a predator. It looks like you don’t have any conscience, that you don’t care for anyone’s wellbeing. Is that you? Are those traits that you have?
LODGE: No, they are not traits that I have, but obviously I did display those traits. I am not argue that I didn’t, because I done the wrong thing really badly. But honestly the traits that I have … I don’t really remember the night and I can’t comment on how it happened or why, cause I’m still trying to find that answer for myself.
SAMPSON: So did you black out?
LODGE: Yeah — I don’t remember that, that whole period. Umm, which is a scary thing. I woke up the next morning handcuffed to a bed pretty much crying ‘cause I didn’t know what had happened and stuff like that, yeah.
SAMPSON: So when you hear things from the victim impact statements when they say you pursued two young women, there was a mother and a nine-year-old boy in the apartment and you were declaring ‘this is the night you’ll die’, or chasing the young boy and saying ‘ you’re too young to die’ — you don’t remember any of that?
LODGE: Nah, I don’t remember the whole, the whole plan out. But from what lawyers and the court proceedings come out and said, it was a pretty brutal night. Some of those facts I wouldn’t agree with, and didn’t happen, but it’s still completely the wrong thing and it was pretty disgusting behaviour. And you know the question gets asked ‘what if that happened to my family?’. I’d be filthy, that’s … of course I would be. If I could take it back, I definitely would. But that is kind of impossible now. So I am really sorry to them, and it’s not only affected their family, but it’s affected everyone around me as well. Like, it’s just embarrassing.
SAMPSON: In an apology that you wrote to the Manhattan couple, dated February 22nd in 2016, you said that you were sorry and you described your state as being immature and easily avoidable. What does that mean?
LODGE: I think by avoid I mean, when I went on that holiday probably ... trying to get away from everything that was happening badly here. I never got the help I needed, and I was reckless with those substances and sleeping pills. I think the findings of my toxicology report after it was it was like a lethal dose of it, so I would have had no idea what was going on that night. It is not something that I would do when I am sober or … like I have never got in that kind of trouble when I haven’t been under the influence of something. So that is where it was avoidable, if I was smart enough to not put myself in that state.
SAMPSON: When you were at the Wests Tigers, a month before this incident in New York, you pleaded guilty to common assault of a woman who was your girlfriend at the time, or ex-girlfriend.
LODGE: Yeah.
SAMPSON: That then shows within a very short period of time you’ve displayed a history of violence against women.
LODGE: Yeah.
SAMPSON: So how can female fans, members of clubs, administrators, CEOs trust you?
LODGE: Yeah, I guess I own that whole part, and I definitely done the wrong thing and could have handled everything a lot better. And I know that now. I don’t support violence against women, and I done the wrong thing. I’ll punish myself for it, and I want to change what other people think of that. I’m definitely against it. But at the same time, I can still admit that I haven’t hit any women or assaulted any. You’ve got to look into the facts when you do read it. It was definitely still the wrong thing, but I definitely didn’t strike anyone or hit em, or cause any harm to any women. That’s something that I want to be strong about. I didn’t hit any of them.
SAMPSON: Because I think … was it light slapping of your ex-partner?
LODGE: Well, that was their original charge which I was still disappointed with, because it wasn’t a light slap. And we took that to the district court, and it got overturned. I’ve got no criminal conviction or no criminal record of causing any harm to any female.
SAMPSON: Because from their account, in 2015 when you came to Australia and you decided to try and resurrect your rugby league career, they saw that as you escaping justice. They feel like you have escaped justice. So, what have you done since then to change your behaviour, your risk-taking tendencies, and try to make it OK for them?
LODGE: I don’t think I am trying to escape it. I can’t be more sorry to them. I will happily say it again: I done the wrong thing, and they didn’t deserve that. They don’t deserve any of that behaviour. I’ll do anything I can to make up for it. But since I got back, I really have turned things around. From that night, actually, I have done a lot of rehabilitation and self-reflection that I probably should have done years ago when I was 18-19, coming through the game. I didn’t get pushed to the point to have to do it, and I didn’t think it would do anything for me. I have done probably a couple of years’ worth. I stayed in a rehab facility for six weeks and lived there with people going through addiction problems and all sorts of things. I’ve done outpatient programs, had counselling. It got mentioned that I hadn’t done any counselling or anything. I think I done a year-and-a-half worth, until I had to move away from Sydney and I couldn’t see my regular counsellor I’d built trust with, so. But I still keep in contact with them and I think I am on the right path now.
SAMPSON: What have you learnt?
LODGE: I guess I understand that people aren’t going to support me, and that’s … especially at the moment. But I’ve got a goal to do more right things than I have done wrong. Hopefully later down the track in my career, people can maybe support me, or see that I have done some positive.
SAMPSON: Broncos coach Wayne Bennet and CEO Paul White are big supporters of yours. You did have an offer to go to the Roosters. Why did you choose to be here in Brisbane? Why was this the best place for you to get your life back on track?
LODGE: Well, I did have offers to go to other places but I did meet Wayne probably three years ago now, and he was upfront. He knew I done the wrong thing. He pretty much said if I’m willing to do the hard work, he will give me a shot eventually. I guess I just trusted him, and took that.
WATCH THE FULL INTERVIEW: Fox League Channel 502 Wednesday 6.30PM (QLD TIME), 7.30pm (NSW TIME)
Originally published as Pills made me a predator: Matt Lodge opens up on the brutal truth of his night of shame
What Wallabies teammates really think of Suaalii’s $9m mega deal
Code-hopping superstar Joseph Suaalii’s rugby union mega deal has been the talk of the town – but what do his Wallabies teammates think of their high-profile recruit’s epic salary?
Origin rivals to combine in halves for new-look Kangaroos
Mal Meninga will unveil six debutants to face Tonga in a new-look Kangaroos team, headlined by two rival Origin playmakers set to start together in the halves. See the full line-up and analysis.