The highs and lows of footy commentary in AFL round 5
JUST like you, Mike Refone watches a lot of footy, so that means — for better or worse — he listens to a lot of footy commentators. Mike takes you through the highs and lows of the weekend’s commentary in a new weekly column.
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THE Adelaide key-forwards’ club, poorly-timed cheap shots and an injured seagull.
Here are the highs and lows of footy commentary in round 5.
Tell us what caught your eye in the comment section below.
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WHAT DO THE KING AND TEX HAVE IN COMMON?
Wayne Carey’s high praise of Adelaide captain Taylor Walker on Channel Seven’s Friday night coverage raised eyebrows.
“To all those people that knocked him for one bad game, he’s stuck it up them.”
Walker has copped a barrage of criticism after a poor Grand Final and an underwhelming start to the season.
On a pre-match segment titled “The Agenda”, Carey said that criticism was unfair after “one bad game” and went on to repeatedly praise Walker throughout the coverage,
“We’ve all had bad games and he has responded beautifully tonight,” Carey gushed. “He’s kicked four goals himself and that (mark in defence) is a match saver.”
Was Carey cheerleading? SEN’s Dermott Brereton thought his Walker praise was over the top.
Referencing Walker’s poor showings in the Grand Final loss to Richmond and the recent hammering by Collingwood, Brereton said: “Those errors are monumental and they are in history now.”
SEN’s Kane Cornes also suggested someone in Adelaide had asked Carey — a former Crow — to praise Walker after a tough run.
It’s not hard to work out which member of the key forward fraternity Walker would choose to have a beer with.
C’MON, SANDY
Credit to new Fox Footy special comments man Nick Reiwoldt who was at pains not to let his unavoidable St Kilda bias shine through after the Saints hardluck draw with GWS.
“I don’t want to sound biased, but for the Saints, you win inside 50s by 21 you have all the opportunities, you expect to walk away winners from those games.”
No credit to Sandy Roberts who interjected — “You can!” — to undercut Riewoldt’s sincerity.
Roberts might be happy to listen to fawning commentary but the rest of us will give it a miss.
Roberts is a veteran of footy commentary but was obviously thrown by sitting next to the Saints champ in the box, at one point telling viewers that Riewoldt had sent St Kilda inside 50.
When it was pointed out he should have said Tim Membrey, Roberts explained he was dreaming that Riewoldt was still out there.
WAS IT A FREE?
As far as post-match interviews go, this was a beauty. Tip of the cap to Fox Footy’s Alastair Lynch for getting the man of the moment, St Kilda’s Jake Carlisle, who dropped the mark that would’ve seen him kick for victory.
But Carlisle won’t be thanking Lynch for leading him down this dead end.
Lynch: “There were 14,000 very nervous supporters in the stand, they were calling for a free kick, did you feel it might’ve been over the shoulder?”
Carlisle: “No I just feel like I should’ve marked it ... was it a free?”
Lynch: “No, probably wasn’t.”
Also of note, Carlisle’s excellently mixed metaphor “I’m sweating like bullets”.
HIT AND MISS
Channel 7’s James Brayshaw was the victim of poor timing on Seven’s Saturday night coverage of Port Adelaide v Geelong. Brayshaw was full of praise for former Kangaroo Lindsay Thomas, who he said was a lovely bloke.
While that may be true, Thomas knocked Scott Selwood unconscious in one of the cheap shots of season 2018 just minutes later. Co-commentator Luke Darcy was left to ask why such a lovely bloke has such an ordinary disciplinary record.
ICYMI: Lindsay Thomas CRUNCHED Scott Selwood and it's fair to say brother Joel didn't appreciate it. How many weeks do you think Thomas will get?#AFLPowerCats pic.twitter.com/BkakOFnIBL
— 7AFL (@7AFL) April 21, 2018
INJURY ON THE WING
Commentators trying to play doctor and diagnose player injuries has long been a bugbear for footy fans. But how about commentators playing vet?
Brian Taylor’s thorough description of an ailing seagull entangled in a passage of play during Channel Seven’s coverage of the North Melbourne v Hawthorn match may have broken new ground.
“Oh the seagull! He got injured, look, his right wing has been partially dislocated and he has to walk home — he can’t fly. He’s got a right wing that just has a little tip out of joint there. Hope he’s all right.”
Happily, Etihad Stadium confirmed the gull made a speedy recovery and was able to wing it home after all.
MORE OF ...
Player interviews are typically snooze-fests filled with cliches. Not so this interview with Daniel Talia on SEN’s Crunch Time.
“I think (Tom Doedee’s) done better than Lever, he’s intercepting everything back there within that role and really dominating, so we’re not feeling the loss of Jake at all at the moment.”
LESS OF ...
Whatever it was Dwayne Russell was going for during Fox Footy’s Saturday afternoon coverage of St Kilda v Giants.
“Shiel, a little shake and bake, does the Beyonce, to the left, to the left and goes for home and goals it!”
The elephant Port must still get out of the room
Port Adelaide planning to confirm its succession plan from Ken Hinkley to Josh Carr before round 1 is odd timing. This could and should have been done by now, as MATT TURNER writes.
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