Rowena Barnes reveals ‘nightmare’ life with former AFL star John Barnes because of concussion

The wife of AFL legend John Barnes has told of the “nightmare” her family is living, as they battle with the former ruckman’s deteriorating mental and physical health, believed to be caused by concussions on the footy field.

Exclusive: The wife of AFL legend John Barnes has told of the “nightmare” her family is living, as it battles with the former ruckman’s deteriorating mental and physical health, believed to be caused by on-field concussions in his playing days.

Rowena Barnes said her once mild-mannered and gregarious husband was now prone to terrifying outbursts and rages which had seen her family at times fear for their lives.

Barnes, 49, has also had many sudden, violent seizures – causing him to drop to the ground and start convulsing, frothing at the mouth and making choking sounds - which have left them fearing for his life.

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Rowena Barnes said her once mild-mannered husband was now prone to terrifying outbursts. Picture: Michael Klein

Director of Neurosciences at Melbourne’s St Vincent’s Hospital Professor Mark Cook told News Corp Barnes “certainly has a number of problems consistent with CTE (chronic traumatic encephalopathy)”, as well as epilepsy, and his “prognosis is poor”.

“Given his long history of head injuries with concussion, this isn’t surprising, and something increasingly recognised in contact sportsmen and women,” Prof Cook said.

Rowena said that in one incident last month the former Essendon and Geelong star became so enraged, he threatened one of their sons in “a spasm of violence” which terrified the whole family.

“He was looking right through all of us like we weren’t there. We were really scared because he wasn’t listening to us. It wasn’t John. I couldn’t reach out to him,” Rowena said from their Essendon home late last week. “It just got out of control and it was like he was going to kill someone. That’s how we felt. It wasn’t the dad or the husband that we knew. My mum was present. My sister was present. It was the most terrifying experience that we have all ever seen.”

The devoted wife and mother has also opened up about the horror of watching the former Essendon premiership player and man she has loved since her teens suddenly lose consciousness and suffer grand mal epileptic fits; a condition which emerged about seven years ago and which the family believes is linked to the concussions he suffered on the footy field during his 202-game AFL career.

In happier times; John Barnes in his playing days with Essendon. Picture: Jackson Flindell

Rowena, 48, said she firmly believed John’s acquired brain injury – responsible for his behaviour changes, anger management problems and memory loss – hade been caused by head knocks.

The family had gone public with John’s health battle some time ago when it was revealed he could spearhead legal action against the AFL over concussion, but his rages and other symptoms had significantly worsened over the past year, she said.

Asked how bad the rages had got, Rowena said: “They’ve been volatile, they’ve been dangerous. They’ve heightened to the extent where we’ve been scared. There’s a lot of anger and you can just see his veins popping out of his head.”

John Barnes clashes with Hawthorn’s Nick Holland. The former Essendon premiership player believes concussion has caused brain damage. Picture: News Corp

Fears John could have a seizure and lose consciousness at any time meant he had to be watched when he was in the bath or near a pool, and his memory loss meant he had to be supervised when he cooked, she said.

And their sons Jack and James, both aged in their 20s and living at home, were struggling to cope with the changes in their dad, who had, until relatively recently, been a fun-loving, social and easygoing guy.

John Barnes flies over the pack at a Geelong vs North Melbourne match at the MCG on September 24, 1994. Picture: Darren Tindale

“He was always the life-of-the-party, a loveable larrikin and the person who used to make you laugh and diffuse situations, but he became a very different person pretty much overnight and that has developed over the last seven years. He is not the person that we knew prior to these episodes,” Rowena said. “He’s still John but he’s not the person I married and he’s not the dad that the boys had.”

John’s failure to recognise them following seizures or to identify where he was and what day it was, was very confronting and upsetting for the boys, Rowena said.

And the week after a seizure was often horrific.

“It’s a week of highs and lows, like a rollercoaster. He can snap at the drop of a hat and go into a rage which is just not John. It’s somebody else,” she said.

Rowena Barnes, wife of ex-Essendon and Geelong footballer John Barnes, says life is incredibly tough for John and for her and the family these days. Picture: Michael Klein

In a heartbreaking interview John told News Corp he was devastated by the impact his failing health was having on his beloved family.

“This thing has got me by the balls and it’s twisting tighter and tighter,” he said.

Without his family’s love and constant help and support, he’d be “absolutely knackered” and “wouldn’t even know what’s going on”, he admitted.

“My wife has been amazing and brilliant but it’s frustrating the shit out of me. I’ve always done what I wanted to do, when I wanted to do it. But now? Nah,” he said. “What do I want to happen? I want to be cured of it, but clicking my fingers ain’t going to work. I have a doctor who is trying his best but there is no simple formula and no simple cure. This thing came out of the blue and now I’m a burden on everyone and everything I touch.”

Barnes has told of the heartbreak of his brain injury and epilepsy. Picture: Jay Town

AFL player agent and concussion campaigner Peter Jess said the Barnes’ family’s dire situation was representative of many other families of footy players who had suffered serious or multiple concussions in their playing days, causing brain damage.

Family members of about 100 past and present AFL players had been in contact with him about devastating post-concussion behavioural changes they were struggling to deal with, he said. Most did not want to take legal action against the AFL but simply wanted it to acknowledge a link between concussion and long-term brain damage and to offer appropriate support.

A spokesman for the AFL said John had declined its offers to be a part of the AFL past player program, that involved further assessment of his health.

The AFL would nevertheless continue to offer this service to him, he said.

A young John Barnes playing football wearing his wedding ring in an Essendon vs Port Adelaide game at Football Park. He has been with his wife Rowena since they were teenagers. Picture: News Corp

CTE is a neurodegenerative disease found in people who have had multiple head injuries. Symptoms typically include behavioural problems, mood swings and problems with thinking. The condition does not usually present until years after the injuries were sustained and often gets worse over time, ending in dementia.

Professor Cook, who treats John, said his future was not bright.

“These aren’t problems that can be easily reversed, so we look at trying to control symptoms like seizures with medication,” Prof. Cook said. “Not much else is available to treat this unfortunately. In that sense the prognosis is poor but hopefully we can keep him independent.”