Susie O’Brien: Why Saints players’ family leave is nobody’s business

Footy is in a new era where clubs care about the wellbeing and mental health of players, so questioning those who put their wives and kids first is arrogant and ignorant.

Seb and Marnie Ross, with daughter Charlotte and twin sons Vinny and Henley.

Happy wife, happy life.

Hasn’t footy journalist Caroline Wilson heard the age-old maxim for marital peace?

It’s not for Wilson – or anyone else for that matter – to question the motivations of two St Kilda players who left their teammates and flew home this week.

Wilson said “supporters and sponsors and members and other teammates would have every right to be a bit disappointed” the men flew home.

It’s an arrogant and ignorant view.

Seb and Marnie Ross, with daughter Charlotte and twin sons Vinny and Henley.

How on earth could Wilson know what’s behind the decision of Seb Ross and Tim Membrey to choose to be with their families and miss St Kilda’s game against Adelaide on Saturday night?

How dare she judge them for putting their wives and kids first for once?

Like it or not, footy has entered a new era where clubs care about the wellbeing and mental health of players. The days of patching up emotionally and physically damaged men and sending them out week after week to kick a bagful of goals are over.

The clubs value and prioritise their players’ family relationships, reasoning that happy men play the best footy.

Wilson raised the ire of many by refusing to apologise for her “perfectly reasonable” questioning of Ross and Membrey.

Tim Membrey’s wife Emily is due to give birth. Picture: Instagram

While some people will grumble in private about what motivates well-paid blokes like this to take off mid-season, it’s not for high profile commentators like Wilson to question the personal decisions made by individuals in public.

No doubt there are very good reasons why they opted to be with their wives rather than their teammates. Who knows?

Wilson has asserted there was no medical emergency, but a personal or family emergency could be just as compelling a reason.

Seb Ross has a young daughter and new twin sons while Tim Membrey’s wife is due to give birth any day, so we need to give them the benefit of the doubt.

We in the media are very eager to step in and condemn footballers when they act badly off the field, so we should be lining up to congratulate them when they behave well.

We have already seen the impact lockdown and the interstate hubs had on many football marriages, so we should be supporting those who put their wives and marriages first.

At this point, St Kilda is languishing at number 13 on the ladder, with five wins and eight losses, so I don’t think two guys missing one match is the club’s biggest concern right now.