Susie O’Brien: Why are we so quick to judge mums just doing their best?

A return to school means a return to the daily fashion show – and associated judgement – that is the afternoon school pick-up, writes Susie O’Brien.

Who knew there were so many opinions on school pick-up fashion, writes Susie O’Brien. Picture: iStock.

Now that parents are allowed back on school grounds, talk is turning once again to the daily fashion parade at the school gate.

Ideally, mums doing drop-off and pick-up will be a little bit Elle Macpherson, a little bit Martha Stewart (except when she was in jail) and a lot Rebecca Judd.

The aim — apparently — is to be hot enough so other mums want to look like you, but not quite hot enough to steal their husbands.

Of course, I am kidding. I am a half-arsed mother so I don’t give a toss what I — or anyone else — wear to pick up the kids from school.

Apart from a vague curiosity over how many women think leggings are pants and have their bits on display, I don’t care if they’re in PJs or P.E Nation designer athletic wear.

So I am gobsmacked at the level of nastiness being levelled at influencer and author Lauren Dubois for giving mums tips on what to wear in a series of sponsored Instagram posts.

Her suggestions include outfits that are “casual but presentable” and look like “you’ve put in a small amount of effort”. This will mean other parents won’t “worry about play dates at your house being inside a dumpster”.

In the now-deleted post, she even noted she has a “massive soft spot” for mums who turn up in PJs.

What’s the big deal? It certainly doesn’t warrant the threats she’s been receiving.

Let’s get this school drop-off issue in perspective.

Are you heading straight to a bar to get day-drunk and forget about pick-up? No, but sounds tempting …

Are you slowing down to 10km/h and making the kids duck and roll out of the car?

No — not today at least.

Does your preppie have a panty liner stuck to the back of his tops because you grabbed his jumper from the dryer at the last minute and didn’t realise it was there until he got out of the car?

Probably not. Hopefully not. But it did happen to a friend of mine once.

Then let’s relax about what you’re wearing. If others want to nail designer chic or dumpster chic, who cares?

Most women are happy to have matching shoes and make-up that isn’t still there from the night before. Nailed it!

Let’s settle this once and for all. What should you wear to get the kids from school?

Clothes. Enough said.

As I’ve said recently, if your friends are judging you for wearing slippers to pick-up, then you need new friends — and slippers that look like shoes.

Susie’s book The Secret of Half-arsed Parenting is out now.

Susie O’Brien is a Herald Sun columnist

@susieob