James Bond’s employer MI6 succumbs to politically correct woke culture

The new MI6 edict on wokeness has led to the reimagining of some classic James Bond films.

Call it a case of life imitating art.

While the fictional super-spy James Bond has long been under fire for failing to keep up with our politically correct times, it seems 007’s real life employer has raised the white flag to the forces of wokeness.

Known by the code letter ‘C’ – or, perhaps more accurately, ‘PC’ – MI6 boss Richard Moore has revealed that his agency’s priority now is acting like a global council worker, checking the world’s bins to make sure everyone has property sorted their recycling.

Sean Connery as secret agent James Bond.

MI6 boss Richard Moore

“Our job is to shine a light in places where people might not want it shone and so clearly we are going to support what is the foremost international foreign policy agenda item for this country and for the planet, which is around the climate emergency, and of course we have a role in that space,” Mr Moore told Times Radio in the UK on the weekend.

“Where people sign up to commitments on climate change, it is perhaps our job to make sure that what they are really doing reflects what they have signed up to.”

“As somebody used to say – ‘trust, but verify’,” he said, referring to former US President Ronald Reagan’s famous quip about making nuclear treaties with the Soviet Union.

“On climate change, where you need everyone to come on board and to play fair, then occasionally just check to make sure they are.”

Sean Connery in Dr No. Picture: EON Sean Connery Moviestore Collection

But while the move may have cheered UK environmentalists, Mr Moore’s declaration was met with scepticism in Australia.

“I just can’t wait for the new Bond car chase scene where the thrill is paused mid-pursuit while both villain and Bond stop to recharge their batteries,” Queensland Nationals MP Matt Canavan told The Daily Telegraph.

“This obsession with carbon emissions weakens the west because it means we can produce less tanks, aeroplanes and rockets than countries like China who ignore climate commitments while bullying their neighbours.”

“No amount of “spying” to find out what the score is will change the scoreboard that sees China getting stronger while we voluntarily handicap our own industry,” he said.

MI6 headquarters in England.

Roger Moore as James Bond.

While previous MI6 chiefs have been content to stay out of the spotlight, Mr Moore has been far more public.

Soon after he was appointed to the role, Mr Moore issued a public apology for MI6’s earlier ban on gay employees, calling it “wrong, unjust and discriminatory.”

“Committed, talented, public-spirited people had their careers and lives blighted because it was argued that being LGBT+ was incompatible with being an intelligence professional,” he said at the time.

When asked about the prospect of Australia’s own emissions reduction efforts being spied upon or whether this was the most effective use of MI6’s resources, a government spokesperson refused to be drawn, simply stating, “In accordance with long standing arrangements, the Australian Government does not comment on intelligence matters.”

Ursula Andress in the film ‘Dr No’.

Roger Moore in 'Live And Let Die'.

DR NO MEANS NO

James Bond is sent to Australia, where he is tasked with finding out who is sabotaging the government’s public service announcements about consent by turning them into bizarre films about milkshakes.

LIVE AND LET DIET

The hard-living James Bond is a thing of the past. In this ode to good health, Bond trades in his martinis for kombucha and Cuban cigars for vapes – and discovers a meat-processing magnate’s plan to put a young upstart producer of ethical protein on ice. In a gripping climax, the villain is dispatched into one of his own meat grinders as Bond says, “Well, sometimes killing can be ethical.”

Sean Connery and Shirley Eaton in ‘Goldfinger’.

BITCOIN FINGER

Who is stealing all the world’s Bitcoin? James Bond is tasked with finding out – but first, he has to figure out what the hell the stuff is.

Roger Moore on the set of ‘Octopussy’. Picture: Sunset Boulevard/Corbis via Getty

OCTO. JUST PLAIN OCTO

James Bond and his love interest, a trust fund baby and performance artist named Mandala (real name: Amanda), watch a documentary about octopuses on Netflix and decide to go on a scuba trip on the Great Barrier Reef. Bond files a report back to London that the reef is dying, even though they saw lots of colourful coral and fish, because it’s important people don’t lose sight of climate change.

Sean Connery and Jill St John in a scene from 'Diamonds Are Forever'.

ETHICAL DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER

James Bond is sent to Africa, where he finds children being forced to mine rare earth minerals to be sent to China to make smartphones and other cheap electronic doo-dads for Western consumers.

He continues on to fulfil his real mission, checking the paperwork of an “ethical” diamond mine down the road which appears to be in order, and hops a ride back home on John Kerry’s private jet.

Originally published as James Bond’s employer MI6 succumbs to politically correct woke culture