Why we should all be going on health dates with our mates

Better together

Why not swap a dinner reservation for a health date? Image: Getty

Got a doctor's appointment or skin check you've been putting off? Why not take a friend along for the ride? 

It is widely known amongst my nearest and dearest that there’s nothing on this earth I hate more than going to the dentist. 

When I was younger my mother had to drag me into the lobby of our family’s dentist surgery, strong-arm me into the elevator up to level 5, and incentivise me to go into the appointment room with the promise of a finger bun after it was over. Though not for 30 minutes after it ended – the cruellest nail in the dentistry coffin. 

It’s a necessary evil, yes, but my disparagement comes from a place of truly pathological hatred. I despise the stark LED lighting, the smell of the fluoride and the god-awful sensation of having someone clattering around in your mouth with metal implements. 

After one appointment when I was 12 where a dental hygienist seemed to make it her personal mission to ensure I could never smile again, my fate was sealed. Now you see why I required bribes for dental work.

Fast forward a few years and I do go to the dentist – without my mother, with a finger bun – but I dread it, and spend every second of the appointment pretending I’m anywhere else.

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It’s also widely known that there’s almost nothing on this earth I love more than spending time with my friends. 

We could be going out for dinner or going for a walk up the street, cleaning our apartments on Facetime or boarding a flight – It really doesn’t matter. Any time spent with my friends is time I treasure. 

This isn’t unusual. Most people live for the time they get to spend with their loved ones, whereas medical appointments and other sorts of necessary life admin don’t exactly spark joy. So why not combine them? 

People are calling them ‘health dates with your mates’ and we think everyone should book one in. 

What is a health date? 

As the name suggests, a health date with your mate involves booking in that overdue medical appointment (or maybe not overdue if you’re not avoidant), but getting your friend to book theirs in at the same time – and then going together. 

Alternatively, if you’ve got a really good friend, or you are one, you can head along to someone’s appointment for moral support, even if you’re not doubling up. 

The idea is that these appointments are not by definition fun, but seeing your friends is. So why not blend the two?

It stems from the same place as doing admin tasks with your bestie, like going to IKEA or heading to the bank (do people still do that?). Running errands can feel like a drag, but adding a friend to the mix can be a great way to spend time together and get things done. 

Popular ideas for health dates include: 

• STI tests at your local testing centre 
• Skin checks at a cancer clinic 
• Blood tests to get your levels checked 
• That physio appointment you’ve been putting off 
• GP check up 
• Eye test 
• Pap smear   

Going to an appointment with a friend can make the experience less stressful. Image: Getty

Benefits of going on health dates with your mates 

Aside from it being much more enjoyable to tackle medical admin with a mate, there are more benefits than just fun. 

Some people experience bad anxiety around appointments, especially those that concern their health. While this can motivate some people to show up to these appointments (sometimes more often than they should), for others this can present as avoidance, and will see them put off going entirely. 

Going on health dates with your friends can be a great salve for both conundrums. For those with anxiety, it can make the experience less scary, and for those who tend to avoid it, it provides a sense of accountability and companionship when forced to show up. For either kind, having a supportive friend in the room or just sitting outside can make a whole world of difference. 

In a post-pandemic, highly digitised world, there’s a lot of pressure to be doing the most aesthetically pleasing, social media-friendly activities with your friends. Booking that hot new restaurant, hosting meticulously planned and tablescaped soirees, ordering $26 martinis (guilty), and renting expensive houses for weekends away. 

It’s all fun, of course, and it’s important to book in that special stuff with your friends. But it doesn’t need to be the only way you spend time together. And while the nights out and weekends away are fun, it’s nice to know your relationships run deeper than a $35 burrata, and that when it comes down to it, your friends will be there for the hard stuff – or at least the less fun stuff. 

Health admin is more fun with a friend. Image: Getty

Some people online have knocked the idea of the mate date, calling it a recipe for codependency. However, I disagree. The point of a mate date is not because you can’t do these things alone. It’s that it’s more fun to do it together. And because it’s fun, it means these admin tasks are more likely to actually happen. 

Not to mention it’s considered incredibly normal for people in relationships to take their partner to appointments. But single people are often not afforded that same consideration, and are expected to navigate those appointments without support. 

“Some people call this codependency but in my experience, bringing a friend to a doctor's appointment that you're anxious about is a great relief. just having someone you trust there can immensely lower your anxiety

While another simply said “I need a dentist buddy 😂 cuz somebody gotta hold my hand or my pressure rises 😩”  And boy do I feel that. 

So this is your sign to book in that health date with your bestie. In fact, why not make a day of it? Start with the dentist, head to the gynaecologist, then treat yourself to lunch. After all, you’ve earned it.

Originally published as Why we should all be going on health dates with our mates