The craziest April Fool’s Day jokes

IT’S April 1, the one day of the year when the funsters of this world enjoy taking the mickey. Here are some of the best jokes doing the rounds.

IT’S April 1, the one day of the year when the funsters of this world enjoy taking the mickey and duping those gullible enough to take the bait.

Here are some of the April Fool’s Day jokes doing the rounds.

A chance to walk the wire

Now this is a cruise with a difference. P&O Cruises is offering the thrill-seeking activity of a lifetime with the launch of ‘Walk the Wire’ — the world’s first tightrope walk between two cruise ships as they glide side-by-side on the Pacific Ocean.

Guests with a passion for the high life can take part in the ultimate balancing act – a 30 metre walk from the top deck of Pacific Aria to sister ship Pacific Eden whilst 40 metres high above the sea.

The high-octane event is available for a select number of guests on exclusive P&O cruises. More than 3000 guests onboard the two ships will have the opportunity to witness the spectacle as they cruise off the Queensland coast.

Big Merino on the move

It’s an undisputed icon of rural Australia. The 97-tonne Big Merino stands proudly in the NSW town of Goulburn as a monument to the area’s wool industry. But, in news that will shock locals, the concrete ram is on the move to Morayfield, Queensland. ‘Rambo’ will take pride of place at a new over-50s lifestyle community Affinity Sheep Station Creek.

Director of Park Investment Properties, Robert Farrell, said the synergy between Sheep Station Creek and the Big Merino was undeniable, with the relocation set to offer the icon a new lease on life.

The Big Merino has a new home.

“Affinity Sheep Station Creek is just an hour from Brisbane, and 40 minutes from the Sunshine Coast, so the new location will provide an opportunity for more people than ever to visit this national treasure,” he said.

“Sheep Station Creek was originally a fully-operational sheep station, which has inspired the country feel of the lifestyle village. The Big Merino, or ‘Rambo’ as he is affectionately known by locals, will feel right at home.

Spin classes for passengers

Here’s a new initiative that will have workout fans feeling pumped. Virgin Australia has today launched Spin Class, the world’s first in-flight cycling studio. The revolutionary new cabin class allows passengers to burn calories on board during long haul international flights.

Virgin Australia is now offering in-flight spin classes.

Passengers can even earn Velocity Points for every kilometre they cycle, as well as carbon offsetting their flights along the way. Exclusive in-flight change rooms are available so you can freshen up afterwards.

Virgin Active Cycle Head Coach, Emma Masters said: “Our team at Virgin Active are used to running Spin Classes at ground level, but we’re thrilled to have partnered with Virgin Australia, and over the past year we have been busy designing the ultimate spin class in the sky.

“Each Spin Class has been designed to achieve optimal in-flight heart rate and maximum calorie after-burn in the case of the Jetlag Buster and Spin & Sleep classes. For those looking to relax, the Cruise in the Clouds options provides a more laid-back workout.”

Virtual reality for cats

In a breakthrough move bid to keep cats safe and conserve Australia’s wildlife, Zoos Victoria have introduced new technology to help our feline friends experience the great outdoors from the safety of their homes. Say hello to Cat VR headsets.

Cat VR visualises every cat’s fantasy — chasing an endless ball of yarn, jumping through a forest of cucumbers and running through a maze of giant cardboard boxes — but without the accompanying threats.

The headsets are part of Zoos Victoria’s Safe Cat, Safe Wildlife campaign, in partnership with RSPCA Victoria. The campaign provides cat owners with information and resources to ensure that both their cat and the neighbourhood wildlife are kept safe.

Barrier Reef campaign revealed

This campaign is bound to generate its fair share of controversy. Online bookmaker sportsbet.com.au today revealed the completion of their latest advertising campaign situated on Queensland’s Great Barrier Reef in Queensland. Using state of the art technology, the bookie has lasered into the actual coral of the reef to reveal SPORTSBET and the sight is even visible from space.

The Great Barrier Reef as you’ve never seen it before.

The project began exactly one year ago and took a year to complete using high voltage lasers imported from North Korea.

“Over two million visitors come to our beautiful Great Barrier Reef each year so it’s really prime advertising space and a no brainier for Sportsbet to expand our marketing with,’’ said sportsbet.com.au’s Will Byrne.

Celebrities stripped bare

Have you ever wondered what Chris Hemsworth looks like naked? Well, obviously. Now’s the time to get down to Madame Tussauds Sydney. For today only, the legendary wax museum is getting all risque on us by opening up a special adults-only room. The 50 Shades of Wax experience will reveal what celebrities look like stripped bare.

Dan Porter, Studios and Operations Manager, of Madame Tussauds Sydney said the decision to open the new adults-only zone was made as a result of suggestive questions from guests.

Megan Gale meets her wax figure at Madame Tussauds, Sydney. The wax museum is opening a special “adults-only” room.

“We lose count of how many people ask us if the wax figures are made to scale and if all the measurements were correct,” he said.

“We thought it was time to remove the mystery by showcasing exactly what the celebrities look like for our inquisitive guests.”

The new experience is open after hours for adults only and tickets will cost $69 per person.

The world-famous attraction will switch the figures each week to ensure guests have ample opportunities to see their favourite celebrities in all their glory. For tickets, visit www.madametussauds.com.au

Sea desks now the new normal

In an Australian-first, Sea Life Sydney Aquarium is now providing staff with water desks. Effective from today, the new program will see staff donning their wetsuits and working from the aquarium’s feature tanks in a bid to diversify work arrangements and increase productivity.

Richard Dilly, General Manager of Sea Life Sydney, said staff members had given the new office set-up a thumbs-up.

The Sydney Aquarium is now providing staff with water desks.

“It’s time to bid farewell to standing desks. Humans have a natural affinity to water as it provides a sense of calm and clarity — two sentiments that are vital to productivity and worker satisfaction,” he said.

“Swimming also builds endurance and cardiovascular fitness while providing an all-over body workout, plus it’s fun! We figured we already have the aquatic resources, so why not test the waters?”

Staff opting for a swimming desk session must first pass a comprehensive swimming assessment to ensure the new opportunity operates swimmingly and staff don’t find themselves in troubled waters.

Pack the Budget smugglers

It’s the question that plagues Aussies the nation over: what do we do with our money while we’re swimming?

Never fear, ING Australia is here to help with today’s launch of Budget Smugglers. Pitched as the perfect coastal companion, the bank’s futuristic swimming trunks will keep your cards safe while in the surf.

ING offers a different take on budgie smugglers.

They come complete with a card pouch featuring triple-layer protection for your valuables. There’s a smartphone-enabled, waterproof magnetic lock, an AI-enabled polymer membrane and a semi-permeable layer of viscous bio-gel. A matching bikini top is also available.

Shabby chic for your wallet

On the subject of banking, ME has today launched a new concept in bank card technology — a readily disposable, 100 per cent recyclable debit card called Chuck.

The online bank created the card with the messiness of life in mind, understanding that customers regularly lose multiple cards.

Rendered in unpretentious cardboard and reinforced with cutting-edge interior corrugation, Chuck will bring a tiny slice of shabby chic to your wallet.

It comes in a sheet of six ready-to-lose cards — so if you misplace Chuck, you can just shrug and pop another one out, ready to use.

“Most cards are designed for people who are organised. Here’s one for the rest of us,” said ME Money Expert, Matthew Read.

“True freedom means never having to worry about where your card is again,” he said.

“With Chuck, your income has never been so disposable.”

GoT star joins the fun

From today, SodaStream is giving users a whole new way to enjoy sparkling water. with The SodaSoak, a sparkling water marker for the bathtub giving you sparkling bubbles.

Partnering once again with Game of Thrones legend, The Mountain, SodaStream has also enlisted Israeli reality star Reza Farahan to launch the SodaSoak.

Game of Thrones star Thor Bjornsson nurses a drink while enjoying a bubble bath.

Daniel Birnbaum, CEO of SodaStream said: “SodaStream is always looking for disruptive ways to create moments of joy and April Fools’ Day is the perfect time to do so”.

As for Icelandic man mountain Thor Bjornsson, he’s on a war against plastic. “The thing about SodaStream’s campaigns,” he said, “is that they address important themes — health and wellness or the global plastic bottle pollution problem — in a lighthearted and funny way that keeps a finger on the pulse of pop culture.”

Have a hassle-free holiday

We all love to go on holiday but let’s face it, travelling can mostly be a drag. There’s the lengthy airport queues, delays, cramped seats and shocking plane food.

Then when you arrive at your destination there’s the battle against the selfie-stick wielding tourists in humid weather.

Say hello to Virtual Holidays, the first fully immersive Virtual Reality trip. The brainchild of leading travel search engine KAYAK, the virtual reality headset lets travellers experience a fully immersive holiday from the comfort of their own home.

The headsets will be available online at KAYAK.com.au from April 1.

Deliveroo offers try before you buy

Can’t decide between that rich blue cheese beef burger, classic pepperoni pizza or fresh salmon sashimi? Today, the panic is over for indecisive foodies, as Deliveroo announces the brand new ‘Try Before You Buy’ feature to the app.

After updating the Deliveroo app to the latest version, customers will have access to two brand new forms of in-app food sampling — smell and taste — so you can flick through your favourite restaurants’ menus and get a whiff of what’s on offer before you commit to purchasing.

The updated Deliveroo app is offering customers the chance to smell and taste their food before ordering.

Deliveroo said the new update was released in response to customer feedback that making a decision around what to order has become increasingly difficult, due to the huge selection of choice on the platform.
The Deliveroo Try Before You Buy smell and taste feature is available to all customers from April 1 at no extra cost.

It’s all about the brows

Online marketplace Groupon is today offering eyebrow enthusiasts the chance to study for a degree in Brow Refinery, Orderliness and Welfare (B.R.O.W). The six-week online course features the latest technical skills for how to achieve this year’s hottest eyebrow trends, including the unicorn glitter brow, rainbow brow and the lightning bolt brow.

For just $49, students will partake in 20 hours of distant learning per week and will graduate with a Bachelor of Brow Science.

Cara Delevingne’s eyebrows are so famous they even have their own Twitter account.

Groupon launched the B.R.O.W degree after noticing a hair-raising increase in customers searching and buying brow related services, from brow stencils to microblading, thanks to celebrities such as ‘Her Eyebrowness’ Cara Delevingne making people brow-obsessed.

Demonstrating the power of the brow, Cara’s eyebrows are searched for online every 0.55 seconds everyday worldwide and even have their own dedicated Twitter account. She follows in the footsteps of other bold brow icons, including Audrey Hepburn and Elizabeth Taylor.

For more beauty and spa deals, visit www.groupon.com.au

Originally published as The craziest April Fool’s Day jokes