The heartache behind Jordan Ablett’s baby bliss
In an exclusive interview, Jordan Ablett, wife of AFL player Gary Ablett Jnr, reveals how her mum’s health struggles affected her own introduction to parenthood, her dislike of the term WAG, and why their son will forge his own path.
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When Jordan Ablett and her husband Gary shared the first joyful images of their newborn son on social media, no-one could have guessed the heartache they were enduring behind the scenes.
Because just over a week prior to baby Levi’s arrival on January 15 last year, Ablett learnt her mother, Trudy Papalia, had stage four lung cancer – and would urgently need to begin aggressive radiation and chemotherapy to treat it.
Making an already devastating situation more painful was the news that Papalia wouldn’t be able to have any physical contact with Ablett and Levi during her treatment.
Faced with the prospect of not being able to introduce her new baby to his grandmother for months, Ablett approached her obstetrician to ask about inducing labour.
“I needed my mum to be a part of it,” Ablett tells Stellar. “I would have really hated for my baby to decide that he’s not going to come out for another two weeks, and then have my mum miss that opportunity to be with me.”
So she and her doctor made an important decision. “We agreed that the following day I would come in and be induced.”
But fate stepped in – and later that night, she went into labour all on her own. Which meant one of the first people waiting outside the delivery suite once Levi had arrived was Papalia.
“I vividly remember Mum coming into the room, and I could just see the emotion on her face,” Ablett recalls. “She started crying, because when you’ve been given that news you can’t help but think the worst. For her to be able to be a part of that moment was really special.”
That first meeting was even more precious once Papalia was separated from the young family for six weeks of treatment. And while the chemotherapy was initially successful, the family recently received earth-shattering news: Papalia’s cancer had returned.
“Mum went into hospital due to severe chest pain,” Ablett says. “They were able to see the cancer had progressed in her lung and was blocking a main airway, which has now resulted in a collapsed lung. So Mum is breathing with just the one lung.
“The doctors have spoken to us and believe there is no further treatment for her, and have sent her home from hospital under palliative care.”
With the country now under the grip of the COVID-19 pandemic, Papalia’s latest health challenges could not have come at a worse time.
But her daughter and the rest of the family have rallied around her, stocking her freezer with home-cooked meals and chauffeuring her to medical appointments.
“We are just being there for her, to chat and process things together, to listen and love her. She’s everything to us,” Ablett tells Stellar quietly. “The hardest part is watching Mum not being able to do the things she’d like to be doing with Levi because her health just doesn’t allow it anymore. She quickly becomes out of breath and is often in pain and then, on top of that, there are the boundaries [because of the virus].”
But Ablett and her mother aim to stay positive and find joy in any time they can spend together with Levi. Having raised three daughters of her own, Papalia tells Stellar she is now happily watching Ablett tackle parenting.
“Jordan’s a natural beauty who’s determined, strong and fiercely protective,” she says. “She treasures Levi, and lavishes her love and gifts upon him. I love watching her keep her focus completely on motherhood, her marriage and family. My grandson truly has the best mother.”
For her part, Ablett credits her upbringing with giving her the fortitude to handle an emotionally fraught year.
“My mum continues to remind us that none of us have more than this day, and what a blessing this day is,” she reflects. “I feel like that can really summarise the kind of attitude my mum has – and her heart.”
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She says Gary, an AFL player for the Geelong Cats and dual Brownlow Medallist, is a hands-on dad who has also provided comfort. With his likely retirement at the end of this year, they will be afforded more free time to spend together.
In the meantime, Ablett tells Stellar that Gary refuses to define himself in any way by his career, and in the same respect, she wants to be pegged as more than just the wife of a footballer.
“I can’t speak for everyone, but the majority of my friends who have partners who are football players find the term WAG very cringeworthy,” she says. “It makes you sound like property.”
In fact, before she and Gary met in 2012 through her brother-in-law, former The Voice contestant Michael Paynter, Ablett had never watched a game of footy in her life.
In the years since, she’s grown passionate about AFL, and while Levi is the third generation in a Geelong footballing dynasty (Gary’s father, Gary Ablett Snr, was nicknamed “God” by footy fans), Ablett says the couple is grateful for the interest the public has taken in their son, but they’re still eager to let him forge his own path.
As for that choice of first name? “The name Gary was 100 per cent not on the cards for Levi,” she says with a smile. “Gary made a joke that we should call him Gary the third, but that was purely because we read that the name Gary was becoming extinct.”
Well, not entirely. The name quietly lives on, as the little fellow was actually christened Levi Gary Ablett.