Former Miss Universe Australia Maria Thattil goes public with new romance
Former Miss Universe Maria Thattil has opened up about her relationship for the first time, with the couple posing together in an exclusive shoot and revealing new details about their love story.
Stellar
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Former Miss Universe Australia Maria Thattil began last year by revealing her pansexuality, leading to a new-found freedom to date openly. This year, the loved-up TV presenter and writer is levelling up: she is now ready to go public with her committed romance to mental health professional Jorgia O’Hare. The 29-year-olds not only share a birthday (born an hour apart on February 19, 1993), but also a palpable chemistry. In an exclusive photo shoot and interview for Stellar, the women open up for the first time about their budding relationship and reveal how they found old-fashioned love in a thoroughly modern way.
Stellar: Maria and Jorgia, this is the first time you’ve sat down to talk about your relationship. Did you meet online or in the real world?
Maria Thattil: I’m going to chalk it up to the algorithm really looking out for us because it was in March last year when I saw a TikTok video of hers. It was viral, so I just assumed she was some really attractive, famous TikToker, and liked the video. Then a month later, we matched on [dating app] Hinge.
We exchanged maybe two messages, but I deleted the whole app because I was going through a “situationship” that was very difficult. And then a month later, I popped up on her TikTok [feed] and she commented on my video, and the rest is history. We just got talking and we’ve been dating since.
Stellar: Where did you go on your first date?
Jorgia O’Hare: Our first date was at my house. I was planning to cook dinner, but I messaged her when she was on her way and said I was way too nervous and was just going to order pizza.
The conversation was brilliant from the get-go; there was a lot of chemistry straight away. We had some nice red wine, and one of the first things Maria did was spill some nice red wine all over my white couch... I knew I liked her from the first night because if anyone else spilt red wine on my couch, I probably would have killed them!
MT: I nearly threw up out of nerves on the way over to her house, but the minute she opened the door, I was like, “OK, I’m staying over.” She was really nervous. Her hands were shaking as she poured me a glass of wine.
Stellar: Was it love at first sight?
MT: It was lust at first sight and it was obsession at first sight. After that first date, I ended up spending the night and the next day, I went off on a work trip to the Gold Coast with my brother and I was secretly referring to her as my girlfriend. I hadn’t felt that way in a long time.
JO: It definitely was [love at first sight] on my end. From the start, I just wanted to get to know her more. I have never had this connection with someone else.
Stellar: You have been careful not to confirm your relationship – until now. Why is this the right time to go public?
MT: It has just been nice to protect and honour our relationship in its early stages. Now, we are coming out and sharing the relationship, but even then, we want to establish healthy boundaries with what you do and don’t let people in on.
Stellar: Jorgia, being with Maria means being in the spotlight. How have you adjusted to the world she runs in, and how does it dovetail with the work you do?
JO: It was completely new for me, but as Maria said, we have so much respect for each other; it’s just taking time to make sure that we are both comfortable with everything. We want to stay in control, to some aspect, of what other people see and view. I work in mental health in disability support, but my background is fashion and design, so I do a bit of graphic design.
MT: That’s what I was drawn to because the work that she does, it takes a very special person with very high levels of empathy.
Stellar: Are you living together now?
MT: We have the best of both worlds. Jorgia has her house, I’ve got my apartment. We spend a lot of time together, but it’s nice to recognise having healthy space as well.
Stellar: Have you met each other’s families?
MT: The first time I met her family, I was welcomed beautifully. I knew I was well and truly integrated into the family [when] her two-year-old nephew pissed on me!
It made me look like I had pissed myself, and I had to make awkward jokes about not being able to hold my bladder. She met my parents and felt at home straight away. My dog chose her over me.
Stellar: Maria, you came out as pansexual last year while you were a contestant on I’m A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here! You fell in love pretty quickly, yeah?
MT: I had been dating women over the year before, but I had never been in love with a woman and never experienced that level of intimacy with anyone, irrespective of gender.
It took a lot to come out – and it shouldn’t in this day and age, but it did. But it opened me up to meeting someone where I could explore those depths of intimacy that perhaps I hadn’t experienced.
Stellar: Jorgia, when did you come out?
JO: I have been out for nearly 10 years, so I’m pretty confident in who I’ve always been.
Stellar: From a sexuality perspective, it has been a pretty big year for you, Maria.
MT: If there is anything I can take away reflecting on the past year, it has shown me how much good and how much love can come into your life when you’re not betraying yourself and denying who you are.
Growing up, if I had seen an interracial same-sex female couple in the media – open, visible, living truthfully – that might have shaped my own experience a little bit more positively.
Stellar: You’ve been named as one of Sydney WorldPride’s 45 “Rainbow Champions” for your contributions to the Australian LGBTQIA+ community, and will appear at Mardi Gras with Jorgia, your brother and his boyfriend. That must be exciting?
MT: Never in my wildest dreams would I have imagined being on a WorldPride float with a partner. I guess that’s the power of fearlessly being out. You open yourself up to more love than you could’ve conceived. Beautiful things happen outside the closet and I’ve well and truly marched out of mine. To have Jorgia, Dom and his boyfriend Ben beside me is going to be a family moment I can’t believe I get to experience.
Stellar: How does it feel knowing that you’ve helped bring people to the table by talking about gender and sexuality from a position of love and kindness?
MT: I’ve grown up in super-religious communities and very conservative communities, where unfortunately the approach is the opposite. It’s anger and shame, and it’s condemning people who don’t fit the rules and the expectations.
It never did anything to educate me; it didn’t inspire me to even consider other world views. I don’t want to do what has been done to me in terms of talking down to someone or coming at them from a place of anger because then the only people you’re appealing to is an echo chamber of people who agree with you.
I know it’s a very sensitive topic, but I guess if I can add a level-headed, inclusive approach where people feel free to pull up a chair, to have a talk and a hug, that is so much better to me.
Stellar: Maria, as part of that approach, your book Unbounded is out in February. Jorgia, given that you’ve read it, let’s flip the script and get a preview from you.
JO: It’s a self-help book. There is a lot in there that she has wanted to keep a surprise, but I know that she has put her heart and soul into creating this. It’s a bit about her religion, growing up, but it’s more about manifesting your life.
Maria is a confident and articulate person. She makes me want to be a better person, just by the way she is. She is constantly showing up for people, whether she knows them or it’s a stranger. She is always wanting to make the world a better place and help people to be the best version of themselves. It’s what I love most about her; she makes me a better person.
Stellar: Maria, as a regular columnist for Stellar, you wrote last year about women’s reproductive rights and your own choice to not have children, saying, “It’s not just OK to not aspire to parenthood – it’s your human right.” Why did you feel it was important to share that viewpoint and what did you make of the reaction it garnered, whether positive or negative?
MT: So many people feel pressure, whether from family, friends or society, to choose a blueprint for their lives that they don’t necessarily want; they choose it out of fear.
It has been beautiful seeing people speak up and share their views. We need to celebrate people and their different choices. It’s a really important conversation. I’m grateful it ended up touching people globally.
Stellar: So this interview and photo shoot must also be important to you.
MT: You don’t often see women of colour on the cover of magazines, let alone a same-sex couple, and the story about how we met is beautiful; it’s inviting people in. For Stellar to platform that is a beautiful thing.
Thattil will join Olay, which celebrates its third year as a sponsor of Sydney Gay And Lesbian Mardi Gras in 2023, on its float at the Mardi Gras Parade on February 25.
Unbounded: Manifesting A Life Without Limits by Maria Thattil (Ebury Australia, $34.99) is out February 21.
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