‘I had no idea the impact it would have on my family’: Twist of fate that changed Dannii Minogue’s life

Dannii Minogue on how her sister Kylie Minogue has influenced her perspective on life, as she reveals why ‘age is such a privilege, whatever that looks like’.

Dannii Minogue reflects on her pioneering support for the gay community – and the childhood dream that changed her life.

Stellar: You’ve worked on a lot of projects in your career – from singer to actor to TV host – but if ever a project had your name on it, it has to be wearing fabulous outfits while playing a glamorous matchmaker on the two same-sex dating shows I Kissed A Girl and I Kissed A Boy …

Dannii Minogue: Thank you for seeing that. My friends know that I love nothing more than attempting to matchmake. We’re making this show in the UK, where there had never been a same-sex dating reality show. That made me really sad – everybody wants to be seen: people who know who they are want to be seen; people trying to figure out who they are want to see something and go, “That’s me; I relate.” It was really important for me to get this on TV, but done in the right way. I didn’t want it to be a scrappy dating show.

Dannii Minogue on set with Stellar. Picture: Steven Chee for Stellar

I begin to wonder! Picture: Steven Chee for Stellar

Dannii Minogue (continued): I didn’t want anyone to [have] a bad experience. I wanted it to feel like a warm hug, that people were there for the right reason. The cast weren’t provoked by producers; there wasn’t some cookie-cutter body mould; you weren’t looking like Barbie or Ken to get on this show. You were there because you were looking for love. I’m proud of it on so many levels.

Listen to Dannii Minogue on the Stellar podcast Something To Talk About:

Stellar: You’ve been a lifelong ally of the LGBTQIA+ community, going back to performing in clubs the early 1990s in London, and at the first all-female show at Sydney’s Mardi Gras in 1998. At the time, that would have been seen as risky.

Dannii Minogue: By everyone! There wasn’t one person that said: “There’s no risk attached” or “You should do it.” It was a very different time.

Fast forward to you hosting I Kissed A Girl and I Kissed A Boy, not to mention moments such as performing at the opening night of World Pride in 2023 with a fellow gay icon, your sister Kylie.

It’s an ongoing love. We give out as much as we receive. It’s an amazing relationship with the community. I don’t think we’ve ever thought, I’m going to do this and lead the way. I got to the point where I thought, stuff it. If you stick to what makes you feel great, what’s true for you … Cut to now when you hear the word “authenticity”. There’s always bravery needed but in different doses for different things, for different people. I just had to go against the noise of people saying, “This isn’t a good idea.” I was like, “Well, no-one has done it before, so let’s see what happens.”

You’ve been working since before you got to double digits, having first appeared on Young Talent Time in 1979 at the age of eight, then joining the show as a regular in 1982. That’s very young to be working.

I realised that looking at my son when he was seven. [Minogue shares Ethan, now 14, with her ex-partner, model, TV host and former rugby league player Kris Smith.] When I was inside that seven-year-old body, I’m like, this makes total sense. Just got to talk my parents into it. It’s like if you want to talk them into giving you money to go buy lollies at the local milk bar, which we used to do. This was the same. There’s something great to be said for getting a job when you’re young, learning some responsibility outside the home, where your parents and guardians aren’t saying do this, do that. Someone else saying that clicks in a different way. And I’ve seen my friends’ kids just blossom from that opportunity to really step up.

So how did you talk your parents into letting you join YTT?

There was a lot of consideration. My mum’s sister was doing acting. Kylie and I had done a couple of little acting spots, but it was nothing that was going to change our dynamic as a family. I watched Young Talent Time and I just wanted to be in that TV set, doing what those kids were doing. But I had no idea of what impact that would have on the family as far as the rehearsal schedule – showing up, being there.

You’re then in the public eye on the biggest entertainment show in the country. I had no idea how that would affect Dad when he walked in the office to go to work, how would it affect Mum. When you’ve got to put your name down for something – Minogue is the most unusual name and it’s like, “Oh, are you related to…?” For my brother and sister, it was a lot at school. We all went to the same school. The kids knew we were all brother and sister. You couldn’t go, “No, don’t know her, never seen her before in my life.” But there was a lot of deliberating, and what I respect and loved about my parents was that they sat me down and talked me through all of that.

Picture: Steven Chee for Stellar

It wasn’t just going to be a yes or a no and “It’s our way and you have to deal with it.” [They were] trying to have a young person understand that here is the impact we can foresee, and then there’s a huge section of question marks where there’s stuff we don’t know what it’s going to be like.

They were smart enough to know that. I’ve seen so many kids, adults and families go through being on TV, becoming famous, whether through reality TV, as an actor or a singer or whatever, and once you arrive there and it changes your world, you’re like, “Whoa, whoa, whoa, I didn’t realise it was going to be that.

And now I don’t want that anymore.” If you’re an adult and you’re making your own choices, it really just affects you. But at that stage, being a child and being looked after, it affected everyone.

I don’t know how I would have coped being in their shoes, trying to make that decision. To answer your question [about convincing them], I think I put on big puppy-dog eyes.

They knew how much joy Kylie and I had. At any given opportunity, we’d be jumping around the lounge room, learning songs and dances, singing into a hairbrush. So they were like, it’s really difficult [to say no] because it’s their world, it’s what makes them light up.

Picture: Steven Chee for Stellar

Minogue soon became a household name, both in Australia and overseas. It proved to be a line in the sand for you and your family: that moment before you joined Young Talent Time, when Minogue was just another suburban family name in the phone book.

Exactly. Yeah. And my parents are very private. They don’t like being on stage, in front of cameras. They back away. So it really had a weight to it. My brother is the same.

It’s been decades since your family’s lives changed after you became a star, and then Kylie was cast in her breakout role on Neighbours in 1986. Do any of you ever talk about how differently things might have played out if you hadn’t been allowed to join YTT?

I don’t know that we’ve spoken about, how would it be different? I guess we have forgotten what it was like before. But we do cherish family moments before that fame came in, where we could freely move about and do things like caravan holidays. We did talk the other day about [how] we’re such a tight unit. We’ve been through thick and thin. We have such a huge respect for and love celebrating each other. And we know that’s special. Not every family has that.

In 2023, Kylie and Dannii Minogue performed together at the opening concert for WorldPride in Sydney. Picture: David Swift

On a night like this! A sweet moment between Dannii, right, and her sister, Kylie. Picture: Getty Images

There was a time when a woman in the spotlight turned 25 and it was: career is over. With Demi Moore tipped to win Best Actress at the Oscars next month, she’s spoken about how her being front and centre at the age of 62 challenges the notion of a woman supposedly being past her prime. When you turned 50 in 2021, you talked about how your mother’s generation had no such examples.

I don’t feel like we had women in film or television or music that gave us any idea that life still goes on. I’m loving what Jane Fonda is doing, what Demi Moore is doing, what Pamela Anderson is doing, Brooke Shields … a lot of those girls that I grew up watching.

We need to see what’s possible, like with I Kissed A Girl and I Kissed A Boy. Things are definitely changing. I hope no women feel like they’re pressured to look or achieve like Demi Moore at that age, because we don’t all have to.

But it’s nice to know that if you really want to go for something, you can do it at any age. You’ve just got to have that energy behind that idea, that real want, [when] you can’t stop thinking about it – it’s all you want to do.

Dannii Minogue and her long-term boyfriend, producer Adrian Newman. Picture: Mark Stewart

Listen to Dannii Minogue on the Stellar podcast Something To Talk About:

You’ve lost people close to you and were by Kylie’s side when she was diagnosed with breast cancer at 36. Those experiences can put things into perspective and make us profoundly aware of our mortality, can’t they?

I remember when Kylie was really sick and there was a chance we were going to lose her, as she recovered and the world was celebrating and we all were too, I lost my best friend to cancer and I was grieving. There was this celebration and grieving. And at the same time, there were so many articles about women: What does she look like?

How old is she? The first line of any interview [was] Kylie … age. Dannii … Does she look good for her age? Because if she doesn’t, she’s of no value. I just thought age is such a privilege, whatever that looks like.

Dannii Minogue has opened up about how her sister Kylie Minogue’s cancer diagnosis changed her perspective on ageing. Picture: Getty Images

I’d stop my friends if they were like, “Urgh, I’m turning 30.” I’m like, “OK, let’s look at how you’re viewing that because it is a privilege.” The younger you can understand that, the more joy you can bring into your life.

I Kissed A Boy premieres at 8.30pm on Thursday on Binge. See the full shoot and read the interview with Dannii Minogue in Stellar today, inside The Sunday Telegraph (NSW), Sunday Herald Sun (VIC), The Sunday Mail (QLD) and Sunday Mail (SA).

For more from Stellar click here and find Dannii’s episode of Something To Talk About wherever you get your podcasts.