Dr Chris Brown on viagra... for dogs

TV host and veterinarian Dr Chris Brown details how one unusual encounter in the clinic proves just how much our relationships with our pets have changed.

Last week, I put a sausage dog on Viagra. An interesting development. Even for Bondi. But it was probably the point where I’d just finished writing the script for Muffin the dachshund’s

little blue pills that I realised I was setting his young male owner up for one hell of an awkward conversation at his local family pharmacy.

In fact, Muffin being given Viagra for high blood pressure – which is interestingly the very reason that little blue pill was created for humans in the first place, before the other “uplifting” signs were discovered – may just be a sign of something significant that’s emerged this year. Somehow in 2021, we have swapped lives with our pets. After centuries spent marvelling at the beautiful simplicity of a dog’s life, in 2021, we’ve manifested one.

“I’m basically in a singles’ social bubble with my postman.” (Picture: Supplied)

The life swap dawned on me when I realised the highlight of my day was bursting out the front door and racing down to the local park for my essential daily exercise and excited run around.

Back home, under the guise of “work from home”, it just feels right to lie in wait until the next daily endorphin hit: the highly anticipated arrival of the postman. Or more specifically, the completely needless online purchases designed to provide both short-term excitement and short-term social interaction. In fact, there have been so many pointless online purchases this year that I’m basically in a singles’ social bubble with my postman, Shaun.

And here we arrive at another human/hound crossover moment. An analysis of these online purchases made this year found that while there was a 167 per cent increase in sales of “above the waist” clothes for Zoom calls, there was only a 39 per cent increase in “below the belt” items. Which is both fascinating and disturbing. Yep, just like dogs, we’re really seeing no genuine need for pants.

Dr Chris Brown features in this Sunday’s Stellar.

This seamlessly (quite literally) has us running into our life-swap moment No.4: the slurping of a drink from a bowl or glass so big you could fit your entire head inside it. Note that this activity may appear earlier in the daily schedule if you’re a parent embarking on remote learning, and that drink will most certainly be something alcoholic.

From there, the similarities become even more profound. My recent Pet Census found that while an incredible 30 per cent of us brought a new pet into the family in the past year, over half of all dogs now sleep in what used to be known as “our” bed.

So, when you do finally call it a night, obviously not before turning around in circles and flopping down with a deep sigh, there’s a better than even chance your spot is already taken. And by someone even more skilled at drooling on a pillow than you are.

Provided we don’t see the need to lick ourselves in socially unacceptable places, 2021 may just turn out to be the year of the dog and the dog’s life. What a treat.

Originally published as Dr Chris Brown on viagra... for dogs