Questions to ask before taking a job or starting a business with your life partner

Reckon you could work with or start a business with your better half? These are the questions to ask yourself first.

Working with a partner or spouse has its benefits, but it can take a little more effort to make it a success.

Before accepting a job or starting a business with your other half, there are a number of factors to consider.

Relationships Australia New South Wales chief executive Elisabeth Shaw, husband and wife business owners Kylie and Anthony Sultana, and husband and wife scientists Matthew and Melissa Call share their advice.

WILL YOU BOTH PULL YOUR WEIGHT?

Shaw says life partners who work together can benefit from knowing what each other is dealing with at home.

For example, if they are running a business and one has to leave work early to pick up their child from school, the other will presumably be understanding and supportive.

On the flip side, however, she says issues can arise if there is an unequal workload at work or at home.

“You might have disputes about whether they are pulling their weight or paying attention to the right things,” she says.

“If you are a couple who work equally and are both well thought of and have got similar levels of stature in the business, that’s going to go much better than if your marriage is in trouble and everyone knows or where one is not performing.”

Relationships Australia’s Elisabeth Shaw says there are pros and cons to working with a life partner. Picture: Supplied

IS THERE JOB SECURITY?

When partners work together, they rely on one source of income for the household.

“You can have common anxiety about whether the business is thriving,” Shaw says.

“If things go wrong, you have no buffer, whereas if someone works somewhere else you might think you have a safety net.”

CAN YOU BOTH COMMUNICATE?

Shaw says transparency and good communication are the keys to making this situation work – and this extends beyond the couple to also include colleagues.

“Maybe in a team meeting you commit to not discussing work issues at home – you say ‘Everything in this room stays in this room’ and live up to that,” she says.

“In the relationship itself, book regular reviews to reflect on how you are going.

“Remember that you might think you are managing it well but unless you ask others you don’t know.”

Dr Matthew Call and Dr Melissa Call run a lab together at WEHI. Picture: Supplied

Melissa Call, who works on cancer immunotherapy projects at WEHI (the Walter and Eliza Hall Institute of Medical Research) in Melbourne with her husband Matthew Call, says they can successfully run their lab together as they have a lot of respect for each other.

“We can discuss things without it getting personal,” she says.

“We can disagree with each other.

“If you are someone who gets on the defensive at any minor criticism, it’s not for you.

“It’s got to be about communication.”

Matthew agrees it is helpful that they can give and receive constructive feedback.

“Our jobs are about challenging ideas so we can’t afford to be thin skinned about criticism – with each other or anyone we work with,” he says.

DO YOU HAVE OTHER INTERESTS?

Shaw says an advantage of working with a partner is that you have a lot in common and a lot to talk about.

This can become a downside for a personal relationship, however, if work is the only topic of conversation.

Matthew Call recommends being upfront and honest if you need to change the subject.

“We talk about work at home a lot but there are times I will go off on a tangent and Melissa has to say ‘Just stop I need a break from work’ and I immediately respect that and either work on my own for a while or say “That’s a good idea, let’s just watch some TV’.”

Creo Wealth co-directors Anthony and Kylie Sultana have developed a course for couples to get on the same page with their money. Picture: Supplied

Kylie Sultana, who is co-director of Penrith financial planning firm Creo Wealth with her husband Anthony Sultana, says there needs to be boundaries between work and home life.

“It is difficult because you do cross over the personal and business life and it’s really hard to switch that off,” she says.

“At work we are doing our roles then of a night-time, you find work slipping into conversations, but I am really good at saying ‘No, I’m not talking about that now’ and we book in a time in business hours.”

DO YOUR GOALS ALIGN?

Particularly if you are running a business, both halves of the partnership need to want the same things.

Sultana recommends establishing goals and time frames from the start.

“You don’t want to get six months in and realise the other person isn’t committed to it,” she says.

“One might think ‘We are just doing this for 12 months’ but the other wants to build it into an empire.

“Know that from the get-go and set your parameters.”

Originally published as Questions to ask before taking a job or starting a business with your life partner