Jane only got to enjoy three days of her pregnancy. Then the vomiting began

“I couldn’t help thinking, do I even deserve this baby?”

We’re taught to expect a glow. The bump photos. Cravings for pickles and ice cream. The gentle kicks and teary ultrasounds.

Jane Larkin thought she’d be the glowing type. The former elite sprinter was healthy, disciplined, and in love with the idea of becoming a mum.

However, that wouldn’t be her experience.

“We only had three days of excitement before it began,” Jane told Kidspot. 

Jane Larkin was hospitalised six times from HG. Image: Supplied.

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"I still threw up the day I delivered"

Her pregnancy would be spent in and out of hospital rooms, with a vomit bucket never out of arm’s reach. 

“I think it took a week to be hospitalised for the first time. I pretty much passed out in my own vomit because of severe dehydration. I think I'd got to about 30 times that day,” she said.

Her diagnosis was Hyperemesis Gravidarum (HG). It’s a severe and often misunderstood pregnancy condition. According to NSW Health it affects an estimated 0.3–2% of pregnancies in Australia. 

Unlike morning sickness, it doesn't ease after the first trimester. 

“I unfortunately had it the entire way. I still threw up the day I delivered,” she said. 

Jane had expected falling pregnant to be a challenge.

“In my mind we were probably going to have to do a little bit more than just have sex and maybe have medical intervention.”

But when she took a test, she predicted a negative result.

Stopping in her tracks to dispose of what she assumed was a blank test, she noticed it was positive. She hadn’t expected it to happen so easily.

“I felt like I almost didn’t deserve to be pregnant, because I hadn’t been trying that hard,” she said.

Surrounded by women who had struggled with infertility, the suddenness of her own result brought on waves of guilt. That only deepened as her symptoms worsened.

She was hospitalised six times over the course of her pregnancy. 

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“I ended up living on KFC chips"

“From the moment the vomiting started, I felt like I was failing my baby,” she said.

The loss of control extended beyond her body and into her diet. A particularly jarring shift for someone who’d once trained at the highest level of sport. 

“I couldn’t help thinking, do I even deserve this baby?” she revealed. 

She could only keep one thing down.

“I ended up living on KFC chips the whole pregnancy, which is something I've never done, because I do not like fast food,” she said.

“But I just had to be like, ‘No, do you know what? That's the only thing I can really stomach.’”

It all led to a traumatic delivery experience she’s still not quite ready to talk about. 

“It wasn’t the beautiful moment people dream of. But it was ours. And she arrived,” Jane said.  

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Looking back, she wishes she had known more about HG. That the misinformation surrounding HG wasn’t so rampant. That women were equipped with facts.

“There's not that much information out there. We only know what we know. I think we owe it probably to be a bit more honest,” she said. 

“Part of me is glad I didn’t know what I was getting into. But the other part of me is thinking that I’m an adult now. I probably could have handled some of the truth.”

She believes too many expectant mothers brush it off and downplay it as just “normal” morning sickness.

“I thought being strong meant pushing through. But strength, I’ve learned, also means asking for help,” she shared.

The entire ordeal has left Jane unsure of what lies ahead. She’s not sure what a return to the track looks like.

“I’ll get fit again. But it won’t look the same. And I’m learning that’s okay,” she said. 

However, for now, she’s happy basking in newborn bliss with her daughter.

“I’ll take that as a win.”

Originally published as Jane only got to enjoy three days of her pregnancy. Then the vomiting began