What’s on in Melbourne

WHO needs the races? This weekend there is a Greek doughnut eating competition and a festival dedicated to espresso martinis. This is a guide to what’s on in Melbourne this Cup Day long weekend.

There is an Espresso Martini Festival so who needs horses anyway.

WE get it. The Melbourne Spring Carnival season is upon and the biggest question on everyone’s lips is: Soooo which race day are you going to?

How about none, Scotty.

If you’re not game enough to play dress ups and take on Melbourne’s wild and woolly weather this long weekend, never fear.

As it turns out, there are still plenty of things you can do that don’t revolve around remortgaging the house so that you can afford to buy a frock and fascinator (Actually, it’s all about hats and headbands this year. Apparently fascinators are, like, so last season.)

Here’s a guide to what’s on around town this long weekend that has nothing to do with horses, high heels or high stakes.

Things to do in Melbourne this long weekend

1. Check out the Bayside Food Truck Fiesta. This fun, seaside festival returns in 2017 for a weekend celebrating food, drink, arts and entertainment. Head to Highett and explore the quality clothing, arts and crafts, jewellery and much more that will be on offer from homegrown brands, designers and creatives. Hello, Nutella and strawberry pizzas from Soul Kitchen Pizza Truck.

November 2-7, Sir William Fry Reserve, Nepean Hwy, Highett. From 5-10pm weekdays and

12-10pm weekends and public holidays.

2. Creep yourself out at Seance — An Immersive Experience at Federation Square. Fresh off the back of a sell-out Edinburgh Fringe Festival season, this is spine-tingling experience that will have you shifting very uncomfortably in your chair. If you like being spooked, this is the perfect post dinner aperitif.

Until November 12 at Federation Square.

3. Treat yourself to Melbourne’s most delicious sweet on wheels at The Food Truck Park’s Sweet Tooth Festival. From edible cookie dough (yes, that is an actual thing now) to caramel covered apples and takeaway tiramisu — this event is sure to leave you on a sugar high.

November 3-5, from 5-9pm at The Food Truck Park, 518 High Street, Preston

4. Get your inspiration on atAffiches, a French graphic design exhibition featuring works from The Letitia Morris Gallery. Hosted by the Alliance Française de Melbourne, discover the talented painters behind some of the most iconic French posters.

Until November 4. Eildon Gallery, 51 Grey Street, St Kilda

5. Go green at the Collingwood Indoor Plant Sale and support Aussie farmers. Indoor plants are proven to help purify the air in your home, calm the mind, and even increase productivity. Plus they look amazing. EFTPOS available. Bring bags and boxes to help transport your new plants. Enter via the Nordik Living entrance on Alexandra Parade. There is a free car park next to the warehouse, accessible via Wellington Street.

Tomorrow from 10-4pm at Greener House, 57-61 Alexandra Parade, Collingwood

6. Taco ‘bout the best way to spend a Sunday. Wrap your mouth around some delicious Mexican treats at the Elwood Mexican Fiesta. You’ll be in fiesta heaven, with live music, a Mexican parade and all the tacos your heart could ever wish for.

From 12pm-9pm, November 5 at The Joinery, 5 Ormond Road, Elwood

7. Fall down the rabbit hole at The Tea Partyat Vineyard in St Kilda. Enter the enchanted garden with oversized butterflies, antique clocks, huge mushrooms and gold guilted mirrors as the sun sets over sparkling St Kilda. Guest DJ JMCEE (Breakfast Club) will spin tunes and the mad hatters will be serving $5 alcoholic Tea Shots and $15 Tea Cocktails.

Sunday, from 4pm-10pm at Vineyard, 71a Acland st, St Kilda.

8. You don’t need to tell us twice. Following on from the success of last year’s sellout event, the Mr BlackFestival of the Maritiniis on again in Melbourne. Check it out if you’re into coffee, cocktails and rollicking good times, obviously.

November 3 — 5 at Meat Market, 1-7 Blackwood St, North Melbourne

9. Unleash your inner flamenco dancer at Vamos with an evening ofFlamenco and Tapas. Get transported to Spain every Sunday evening with traditional music and dance, and enjoy delicious tapas and Spanish and Latin American wines and beer.

From 6:30-9:30pm at Vamos, 1st Floor, 37 Little Bourke St, Melbourne

10. Support local designers at the NovemberFashion & Design Market. You can shop ‘til you drop with more than 50 Melbourne fashion labels, artists and makers under the one roof.

From 10am-5pm, November 5 at The Atrium, Federation Square

11. Go shopping for a tiny home at the Tiny Homes Australia Open Day. This is the first time the Tiny Homes have been on display together, so head down for some downsize inspo and a delicious sausage sizzle.

November 4-18 at Tiny Homes Australia, 8/36 New Street, Ringwood. Open times vary so check website for details.

12. Feel the hippy vibes and get all the free hugs at Benalla’s Happy Wanderer Festival. Dance to some live music, do a yoga workshop, float in the river, pet farm animals or sip on chai tea in the chai tea tent.

November 3-6, 118 Yin Barun Road, Benalla, Victoria

13. Compete for the title of Greek doughnuts eating champion at the Oakleigh Glendi Festival. If you think you have what it takes to be this year’s crowned doughnut king, Honey Dee Loukoumades are at it again with their famous Loukoumades Eating Competition.

November 4 — 5, Warrawee Park Oval, Oakleigh