Aimee Shackleton discovered an entirely new family upon finding out she was donor conceived
A woman in Melbourne’s south east is rewriting her identity after meeting her biological father and siblings at 40. READ HER STORY
South East
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Despite millions being sent globally everyday, not many people can say they have received a letter that literally changed their life.
But for a Chelsea woman, a letter from her father did just that.
In 2019, when she was 39, Aimee Shackleton opened her mailbox to a letter from a government agency that she had never heard of before.
“I googled the agency, and on the website, it had words like surrogacy, IVF and donor conception,” Ms Shackleton said.
“I was incredibly shocked, I never had any idea.
“I grew up in a very loving family, I love them very much.”
A change in legislation meant donor parents and children were able to contact their biological families for the first time. Ms Shackleton, unknowingly, was one such child.
Four decades earlier, Ms Shackleton’s parents had gone through the donor route in order to conceive her, and had been instructed to forget about the donation, as the donor parent would not be able to contact them.
Ms Shackleton’s biological father, who she calls Sig, had also pushed away the memory of his donations, until he received a letter from the same government agency.
It turned out Sig did not come alone — he had been in touch with two more donor siblings, brought together by Ms Shackleton’s new found half-sister Elena, who had also found their brother Luke.
“I never had a reason to think about it, I never felt like I didn’t fit in,” Ms Shackleton said.
“However, meeting my biological father has answered many questions that I didn’t realise I needed answered.”
The letter itself was a revelation for Ms Shackleton.
“As I read the letter, it was as if I was reading about my life, interests and hobbies,” she said.
“He’s a teacher, I’m a teacher, we both are incredibly musical — there were so many similarities between us, I was just blown away.”
Ms Shackleton said she also felt a strong connection and kinship with her donor siblings, who were all born in the same year.
“There was no awkwardness when we were all together for the first time,” she said.
“We just dove straight in. Now we speak daily, and are very close.”
Ms Shackleton spoke of the strong connection she feels with Sig, and on a milder level with her siblings.
“It is positive, it’s supportive, but sometimes it is very overwhelming,” she said.
“Going back and rewriting your life after 40 years is a big job.”
Ms Shackleton has since started Donor Conceived Australia, an organisation that aims to support, educate and advocate for donor conceived people in Australia.
Ms Shackleton will appear on SBS’s Insight at 8.30pm on Tuesday alongside others in similar situations to her.
gemma.scerri@news.com.au
