Quick Kicks: James Hird, Tom Hawkins and a soon ex-AFL man sets his demands

James Hird the local footy coach, a club placing a bid to land Tom Hawkins and the AFL player set to be delisted wanting 55k. It’s all in local footy’s latest rumours.

Good luck, defenders. Local clubs want the Tomahawk inside 50 next year. (Photo by Josh Chadwick/Getty Images)

It’s heating up now.

No, not the finals race ... the silly season.

Here at Quick Kicks we look at the lighter side of local footy.

Whether it be a funny exchange, a good stat or an action that’s laughed about after the game — it’s all here.

HAVE YOU HIRD THIS ONE?

James Hird to coach at local level? Well, maybe, with reports of a suburban powerhouse club reaching out to the Essendon champion about filling its vacant coaching position. The mail comes from a strong source who has his finger on the pulse. Our snout is also adamant the same club was chasing the great Gary Ayres.

Former Essendon captain James Hird. Picture: (AAP Image/Julian Smith)

HEY HAWK, WHAT ARE YOU DOING NEXT YEAR?

It didn’t take long for one local club to pick up the phone and ring retired Geelong champion Tom Hawkins. The 796-goal Cat called time on his AFL career last week and one club in metro Melbourne, which is known for a big-name recruit, picked up the phone right away. We don’t know what Hawkins’ answer was but we do know full backs in local footy wouldn’t stand a chance if he said yes.

Tom Hawkins. (Photo by Josh Chadwick/Getty Images)

CHA-CHING

The 2024 season hasn’t even reached finals stage but rumours are already swirling about 2025 and who might be playing and coaching where next season. One of them concerns an AFL player who is resigned to losing his place on the list. He’s apparently let it be known he might be available to local clubs next year. They better start saving: he’s thinking he’ll sign for nothing less than $55,000, with a well-paying job thrown in.

HANG ON, WHY?

An umpire in a Southern league Division 4 match had players in hysterics a couple weeks ago when he awarded a free kick.

It was in a marking contest and there was no push, no high contact and no jumper grabbing, but according to the umpire “it just didn’t look right”.

When questioned: High? Hold? Push? The umpire stood firm and said “I don’t know what it was, but it just didn’t look right”.

We’ve seen plenty of Div 4 footy and are backing the ump in.

‘TAKE IT TO THE BANK’

There’s talk an ex-AFL man is looking to change allegiances this off-season. The word is he is looking to move a little bit closer to home and no better place to go than the club in your own suburb. Apparently he is only going to play enough games to qualify for finals and potentially do a bit of coaching as well. A coach in the same competition was so confident, he told us to “take it to the bank”.

BURKEY’S BACKYARD

Nathan Burke is a proud Frankston product having grown up in the Pines (Frankston North), so his appointment as coach of nearby Karingal was a homecoming of sorts.

But it’s even more so, according to the former St Kilda captain, who points out the first house he bought was, in fact, in Karingal.

“I grew up in the Pines obviously but my first house was off Skye Rd, in Warawee Circuit,’’ he said.

“When we got married, that was our first house and we lived there for three or four years.

“So it’s back to the old stamping ground.’’

Nathan Burke. (Photo by Morgan Hancock/AFL Photos via Getty Images)

REALITY CHECK

There was quite a scene in a down-the-divisions senior game last Saturday after a defender came off the ground for a breather. He was rather worked up about an opposition player being allowed to drift forward and do as he pleased. In colourful terms the defender ranted and raved for a minute about how no one would pick him up. The interchange bench fell silent - until the runner decided to cut him down to size. “Hey mate, why don’t you go over and *%^$#@ pick him up?’’ Rant over.

SIGNINGS ALREADY

They want to keep it quiet, but officials at a Mornington Peninsula Division 2 club are already out hustling for recruits for next season, determined to see their side return to the upper rungs of the ladder. The word is a handful of good players are already locked in for 2025.

IS CLUB MOVEMENT ONLY HEATING UP?

Clubs are starting to make player movements for next year but what about league movements? Some clubs across the state have already announced their intended destinations but could there be more on the way. Stay tuned.

STARGAZING AT CRIBBY

Was that an international sporting star we spotted at Crib Point last Saturday? Yep, sure was. Geva Mentor, the England netball legend, was there with friends enjoying the winter sunshine and the unique Magpies music, which blasted each time Cribby kicked a goal. “We reckon she’d look good in the black and white stripes next year,’’ Crib Point posted on Facebook.

Geva Mentor (back row, third from right) at Crib Point's match last Saturday. Pic: Facebook

GOOSE WATCH

Another bag of goals for Simon Goosey. We reported a few weeks ago that the Mornington footy legend had made a return to playing at 55, with the Raiders’ superules side. Well, on Sunday he fired off eight goals to go to equal top of the goal-kicking chart — in only four matches. The Goose has kicked hauls of 7, 10, 9 and 8. Yep, he’s still got it.

MIGHTY MAX

What a week for talented young footballer Max Simone. Not only did he help Victoria’s 12U side claim the Australian championship in Geelong, but he also won a league best and fairest medal during the week. Young Max and his dad drove back to Melbourne on the Wednesday night so he could attend the Essendon District football league juniors vote count with his East Keilor teammates. And, bang, he took the top award.

BE PATIENT YOUNG FELLA

Sunshine gun Nathan Carroll brought up his 100th goal last weekend but there were a few nervous moments in the lead up. Some onlookers told us it took a few shots before he finally cracked through. He finished the day with seven but it could have been so much more.

Nathan Carroll cracks the ton. Picture: Andrew Batsch

MAKE YOUR MIND UP

Spare a thought for the women’s teams playing in Essendon District league grand finals this weekend. In the space of just several days, the locations have moved three times. Games for division one, two and under-18.5 girls were originally meant to be played at Coburg City Oval. It was then moved to Essendon’s AFL home, The Hanger, then a decision was made to move it again. Finally we’ve settled on Glenroy’s Sewell Reserve. We got there, but there’s still a bit of time until game day.

FIGHT FOR SURVIVAL

The relegation battle in NFNL Division 1 and Division 2 will be decided this weekend. In the top flight, Bundoora hosts Macleod at Yulong Reserve. The Kangas need victory to remain in the hunt for survival, while Bundoora can secure its place in the competition for the 2025 with one game remaining. Meanwhile in Division 2, Laurimar welcomes Watsonia for a winner-stays face-off in the final game of the season. The Power sit two points above the Saints, meaning whichever club wins remains and the other is forced back to Division 3.

A TRUE GRAND FINAL REMATCH

Kyneton and Macedon will face off in the Riddell District women’s grand final for the second year in a row. The Tigers are reigning premiers at a 23-point win last season but the Cats go into Saturday’s clash favourites. Macedon trounced its arch-rival by 31 points in the major semi-final, holding Kyneton to just nine points. As many as 12 Tigers will be looking to go back-to-back, while there could be 11 Cats looking for revenge.

A NEW KID ON THE BLOCK

There’s soon to be another feel good story coming out of local footy, with a junior club rumoured to be discussing a senior club launch. They’ll have no trouble gathering numbers, being located in one of Victoria’s biggest growth corridors.