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More struggling families turning to food charities

“You’re a dentist, you’ll be OK” was the constant assurance Brenda heard as she struggled after her husband’s untimely death. She desparately wanted to reply: “No I’m not.”

“You’re a dentist, you’ll be OK” was the constant assurance Brenda heard as she struggled after her husband’s untimely death. She desparately wanted to reply: “No I’m not.”

Having a successful career in dentistry wasn’t enough to shield Mrs Hughes and her family from life-changing tragedy and its aftermath.

Instead, it was her training that enabled her to realise — long before Mark did — there was something very wrong with his CT scan.

“I knew as soon as I looked at it, I could read the scans. I knew what was going on but I couldn’t say anything to him,” Mrs Hughes said.

WHY IT’S SO EASY TO FALL INTO POVERTY

FEED MELBOURNE APPEAL TURNS 10

“When I had to go home and tell the kids ‘Dad’s got cancer’, and they said ‘Is he going to die?’ I knew that he would but I couldn’t say it.”

Mark had a rare form of cancer, alveolar soft part sarcoma, and died eight and a half months later.

Mrs Hughes soon found herself a single mother with four young children, stretching the budget to meet funeral and school costs, and having to choose between food and school shoes.

“They’d worn through their shoes — they were walking around with holes straight on to the ground,” she said.

To make things worse she injured her hand, which affected her ability to work.

“We went through his superannuation, I had maxed out my credit card. Before then I’d never missed a payment on the mortgage.

“People keep saying to me ‘You’re a dentist, you’ll be OK’ and I think, ‘No I’m not’.”

After seeing her try to keep a brave face while dealing with grief and four growing children, a friend referred Mrs Hughes to Kingston City Church’s emergency resources program, a recipient of a 2017 Feed Melbourne Appeal grant.

“Just getting the food — the first box I got that week was everything I needed,” Mrs Hughes said.

“My pantry was bare, my fridge was bare and I felt that week that I could put food on the table for the kids, which meant I could get the money together to get them the things they needed for school,” she said.

“I’ve had to be strong for the kids the whole way through but I could come here and say, ‘Well, I’m not OK’.

“It doesn’t matter where you’re coming from in life, you just don’t know what’s going on in people’s personal circumstances. There shouldn’t be any judgment or assumptions being made. It can happen to anybody.”

artwork for donation tile promo for Feed Melbourne appeal

Things are now looking up for the Hughes family.

“I’ve still kept my qualifications as a dentist; being registered, I’ve kept all that up to date which in itself incurs costs,” Mrs Hughes said.

“I’m studying a diploma of business and management, hopefully to get into something within the management field in the dental industry.”

“Coming here I know every week I can get some milk, bread, fruit, veg. I know I’ve got that guaranteed now which is really good,” she said.

Her eldest daughter is studying part-time so she can work and help the family.

DINGLEY CHARITY A BEACON OF HOPE FOR FAMILIES

Pastor Joy Hansen from Kingston City Church helps run the Emergency Resources program. Picture: Wayne Taylor.
Pastor Joy Hansen from Kingston City Church helps run the Emergency Resources program. Picture: Wayne Taylor.

BRENDA’S family is just one of almost 200 families helped each week by Kingston City Church’s Emergency Resources program.

For Pastor Joy Hansen, making people feel comfortable and respected was just as important as ensuring they had access to healthy, fresh food.

“With people, like Brenda, who’ve never had to ask for help before it can be very difficult so we try to ease some of that,” Ms Hansen said.

Along with providing fresh produce and staple grocery items, the Dingley program offers light refreshments so people can drop in and have a chat as well.

“For some people, if they have lost their job they lose their self-worth,” Ms Hansen said.

“Sometimes we’ll refer people to counsellors if they need more help but sometimes all they need is someone to listen to them, who isn’t emotionally involved in their situation.”

The community food bank received a $10,000 Feed Melbourne Appeal grant last year, which was a huge help.

Every dollar raised during the appeal goes to charities, such as this one, to continue the work they do.

One of the most rewarding things was seeing people thrive after receiving help from the Emergency Resources Program, Ms Hansen said.

“A lady had stopped me to on the street to say she now owned a coffee shop — she was able to get back on her feet,” Ms Hansen said.

“People do get back on their feet. Most people don’t want to be on the dole, most people don’t want to be unemployed.

“Who would want to be in that situation?”

artwork for donation tile promo for Feed Melbourne appeal

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Original URL: https://www.heraldsun.com.au/leader/inner-south/more-struggling-families-turning-to-food-charities/news-story/9be3cfe18f8f1a1eca1886e6dde19aa0