Melbourne council fails: Times local governments got it really wrong
A sharp art installation with the potential to impale passersby is just one of the baffling council decisions that will make you shake your head.
Inner East
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We all make mistakes but these are some real doozies.
And as local councils increasingly veer away from discussion about roads, rates and rubbish in favour of tackling the bigger issues, such as banning plastic cutlery or freeing Julian Assange, we take a look back at some of the times they didn’t even quite get the basics right.
From a tree planted smack in the middle of goalposts to a vile hidden message in a council-issued wordsearch puzzle, here are some of local governments’ biggest blunders.
TREE PLANTED IN GOAL SQUARE AT RINGWOOD OVAL
Maroondah Council was left red-faced after planting a tree squarely in front of goalposts at a Ringwood oval.
Resident Mike Barclay sounded the alarm about the bizarre positioning of the tree, planted directly in front of the goalposts at Towerhill Park Reserve six years ago.
Mr Barclay questioned how much time and money was spent fixing the blunder.
“It’s another one of those silly decisions that council makes,” he said.
And while Maroondah Council initially denied planting the trees, it later admitted fault.
Then-Mayor Tony Dib said the tree was relocated soon after being planted at no cost to ratepayers.
Seedlings, which had been erroneously planted around a popular cricket pitch at the reserve, were also removed.
Cr Dibb did not explain how the mistake was made or what prompted the council to move them.
BASKETBALL COURT USERS TOLD TO WHISPER
Port Phillip Council was accused of taking “Nanny State to the next level” when it put up signs outside a basketball court asking users to “whisper before dusk and after dark”.
The sign, erected at South Melbourne’s Eastern Reserve in 2017, told players to “have fun” but essentially made quiet time a 24-hour event.
A post on the Facebook page of internationally famous rock ‘n’ roll venue Cherry Bar, seen by more than 50,000 people, said: “For the love of God let’s not hear the hideous sound of children actually playing outside as the sun sets”.
Rebecca Alcott commented on the post: “We can only hope there’s a typo here or the poor little terrors have to creepily whisper 24 hours a day”.
Will Marshall wrote: “So, during dusk, make as much noise as you want!”
Then-mayor Bernadene Voss acknowledged the signs were wrong and they were soon changed.
She said they were installed in response to “about 10 complaints” from nearby residents about excessive noise after dark.
COUNCIL PLUNGES FOOTY PLAYERS INTO DARK
Several women’s football matches were abandoned in 2019 after players were plunged into darkness thanks to a Bayside Council blunder.
Three Old Brighton twilight games were called off when the lights, controlled by a timer, switched off during the match.
In the third incident, the lights went out in the third at 6pm despite assurances from the council they would stay on until 7.30pm.
Coach Peter Grant was left fuming.
“It’s unacceptable, complete and utter incompetence,’’ he said.
“I have it in writing from the council that they were set to go off at 7.30pm. They were being cute in not giving us a straight answer and we demanded a straight answer and we finally got it.
“In the back of my mind I was concerned it would happen again, despite the fact we had it in writing. Come 6pm, they went off. As far as I’m concerned we won’t be playing twilight games again. You can’t risk it.’’
Bayside Council told the Leader it had no record of the club asking for the lights to go off after 7.30pm but they had since “contacted the league and clubs to establish the upcoming game times so that the lighting timers can be set to match the scheduled game times”.
“We are very sorry that the sportsground lighting did not match the game times,” the council said.
“Following advice about the match times, arrangements were made for the lighting timers to be changed. Unfortunately there seems to have been a problem with the change and the lights turned off prematurely.’’
VILE MESSAGE IN MARIBYRNONG COUNCIL WORDSEARCH
Maribyrnong Council was forced to issue a grovelling apology after a vile message inciting sexual violence against women was published in the latest edition of its magazine.
Horrified residents were blindsided when they opened last year’s spring edition of the council’s Maribyrnong Messenger publication to find the words “rape girls” clearly spelled out in the wordsearch.
Sickened locals took to social media to warn neighbours to throw their copy of the publication, which was delivered free to letterboxes in the area, in the bin.
Council chief executive Stephan Wall issued a statement on the council’s website, blaming a computer error for the disgraceful message.
“The unacceptable combination of letters in the word search was computer generated. We will not be using the software again and we are filing an official complaint,” Mr Wall said.
“Please be assured we are taking this extremely seriously.”
The nasty message was removed from the word search in the digital version of the Messenger.
TREE PLANTED TO ‘FIX’ ST KILDA POTHOLE
When neighbours in a St Kilda street asked the council to fix a pothole, they didn’t quite get the solution they were looking for.
Instead of filling in the hole, workers planted a tree in it.
The bizarre gardening effort saw Port Phillip Council dubbed the “Fawlty Towers” of local government by Somerset St residents.
It’s understood the pothole resulted from heavy construction work on a nearby development.
Former Mayor Bernadene Voss said the tree was “mistakenly” planted in the asphalt and had been “quickly relocated” following the Leader’s inquiries.
She said a council officer had “assumed the deliberately cut out piece of road, which did not resemble a pothole, was an existing tree plot as there are other trees along the street”.
DANDENONG COUNCIL INSTALLS PARKING METER ON HIGHWAY
A parking meter was installed on Princes Highway in Dandenong in 2017, but no-one seems to be feeding it.
Council documents revealed it could take more than 20 years to recover the $8203 installation cost of the meter, which pulls in just $452 a year.
The meter, used by less than one person a day last financial year, was installed in front of Coles supermarket — which offers up to three hours free parking in its carpark.
Another meter was erected next to the KFC carpark which offers an hour free parking. It had only raised $5329 in two and a half years.
Greater Dandenong Council’s engineering services director Julie Reid said at the time parking meters weren’t there to raise revenue but as a tool to manage parking demand.
“Data identified these parking areas were in high demand, often making it difficult for customers and visitors to find a space,” she said.
NORTHCOTE’S $34K SPIKY MEDIAN STRIP ART
“Dangerous” public art had to be removed from a median strip in Northcote in 2013 due to safety concerns.
The controversial steel pyramid installation in High St — between Clarke and Westgarth streets — cost ratepayers $34,000 but was taken away after traders and community members raised concerns about safety due to the sharp edges.
Westgarth Traders Association president Peter Lynch said at the time he feared a cyclist, motorcyclist or pedestrian would be impaled on the “metal shard installation”.
All councillors voted to remove the pyramid-like structures as a matter of urgency due to safety concerns.
Cr Vince Fontana said the council got it “dreadfully wrong”, while Cr Angela Villella described the installation as a very expensive mistake.
CREATIVE SOLUTION TO QUELL YARRAVILLE SPEEDSTERS
After generating fury among parents of young children, “dangerous” giant polka dots painted on a Yarraville street this year road were replaced by speed humps.
The polka dots were splashed along busy Anderson St in a bid to get cars to slow down — but families swiftly slammed the move, saying it encouraged children to play on the road.
Yarraville resident Anthony Gracia said he saw first hand how dangerous the installation was when a car had to honk at a three-year-old child to move off the road.
“I saw kids hopping dot to dot playing games, there was a car approaching and the car had to honk for the children to move away – there was a three-year-old child among others,” Mr Gracia said.
Speed bumps were swiftly installed over the top of the dots.
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