The Bachelors are losing power as the women on the show take over

The Bachelor’s new format shake-up means the men are getting rejected and for very unexpected reasons.

The Bachelors episode four opens with Bachelor Jed aka a poor man’s Travis Barker playing the drums which is so staged it is all too much.

Bachelor Felix calls Jed’s loud banging “pent-up frustration,” and it dawns on me that Felix’s entire personality is making jokes that aren’t funny – he is so lucky he is tall.

Felix’s height is the easily the most likeable thing about him. Source: Network 10

As you may remember, last time we were in the Bachelor mansion, it was all about Jess being in an open relationship and Tash, aka the season’s villain telling Felix about it.

At the time, Felix acted utterly horrified at the idea of having to share Jess with anyone, meanwhile, he was kissing half the mansion. Basically, Felix is giving big Tristian Thompson energy and all the girls are Khloe Kardashian.

Open relationship Queen Jess got a hard time last episode. Source: Network 10

Tonight Felix has clearly had a big heart-to-heart with a producer and now decided he loves Jess and he gave her a rose for a reason. Was that reason ratings? Well, probably.

But, back to Felix, the giant man is delighted to change his tune, he even explains he’s prepared to have a civilised chat with her and why does this very tall man give off the vibe that he is still on his parent’s Medicare card?

After Felix declares that he is going to try and make things work with Jess, Jed tells Thomas and Felix that he thinks Tash is a troublemaker. Yes, we are in 2023 and still accusing women of being drama starters.

Tash is not here to make friends. Source: Network 10

Watching the three men trying to analyse women’s behaviour is tedious. It is obvious they are out of their depth and will never understand a mastermind like Tash. There’s lots of meaningful looks and “yeahs” thrown around.

We can only pray none of these men ever try to host a podcast, but considering they are on The Bachelor, it will likely happen soon.

Finally we get to stop watching the boys bond and get to the good stuff! Tash apologises to Jess for being so mean about her being in an open-relationship but Jasmine doesn’t accept her apology. Who is going to tell Jasmine she is not Jess? Not me, she’s scary.

Osher turns up like a ray of sunshine to let everyone know there’s a new group date. Jess isn’t invited this time – which makes no sense because didn’t Felix declare his undying love for our polyamory queen? But whatever.

Bachelor Thomas’ group date is very calm, aka boring. However, in the interest of seeming edgy, Thomas announces that he used to be a party animal but now is just high on life. I assume he means being on reality television makes him so anxious that he feels high on life.

Thomas spends his group date staring into people’s eyes whole on a yoga mat. This is the genius of him, I see this man running a cult in no time.

Kirsten and Thomas have strong chemistry. Source: Network 10

Kirsten, who is 38 and I’ve never seen before today, has the best staring moment with Thomas. Thomas tells Kristen that he can see “pain” in her eyes, and it sounds like a line straight out of Edward Cullen’s mouth from Twilight, and she eats it up.

Meanwhile, Jed gathers his ladies and tries to gauge if they all hate him over the open relationship saga. Jasmine is still the spokesperson on the issue despite the fact it has nothing to do with her and they all agree to put it behind them but no one can shut up about it! So, clearly this will not be in the past.

Tash is not impressed at all and she’s giving – I will end you – vibes. Tash compares Jasmine to a blowfly trying to eat her food; honestly, the woman must write poetry.

Jed is clearly exhausted from trying to keep everyone happy. Source: Network 10

Weirdly, Tash and Jasmine talk about how awkward is to date the same guy when they both clearly hate each other and yes it is uncomfortable but it is called show business, baby!

Felix plans his date at a water park because he is an f-boy genius, and yes, he is shirtless and yes, he looks amazing until he opens his mouth. Self-love Queen Yuri points out that Felix is annoying, and I’m glad someone has realised.

Yuri is the most sensible person on this show. Source: Network 10

Jasmine decides to set the record straight about her OnlyFans account and finally something exciting is happening! Jed doesn’t care, which is nice but makes the whole interaction incredibly boring.

I think even Jed realises he is boring because he asks Jasmine what she thinks of the girls in the mansion but Jasmine doesn’t give much back and honestly, Jasmine, this is why everyone likes Tash more.

Finally we get back to mansion, and now all the bachelors and bachelorettes are back together. Felix declares that he has to stop kissing everyone but then makes out with Tilly.

Felix can’t stop kissing! Source: Network 10

This sends everyone into a rage, and Yuri is done and says, “I just can’t stand men that pit girls against other girls for their own amusement.”

The girls unite to tell Felix to stop making out with everyone, and Felix is very annoyed by this suggestion and clearly has no plans to change his ways.

Meanwhile, Thomas is blinded because Kirsten – his favourite person to make ‘love eyes’ at – confesses that she has two children.

Thomas is mortified and acts like she just told him she’s a modern con woman and then he rambles on about having two stepfathers growing up, and how he doesn’t want to date someone with children, and I guess he needs to go back to dating women that own debit cards not credit cards.

Finally, something interesting happens! Jasmine tells Thomas she’d rather date him than Jed. Thomas isn’t very excited and explains he is already too confused. Jasmine is miffed but isn’t defeated.

Osher rounds everyone up for the rose ceremony, and Yuri has her own Elle Woods moment, rejects Felix in front of everyone, and then wishes the girls all the best. It gives the primary character energy, and I look forward to seeing her on Love Island soon.

Three men that are clearly not in charge. Picture: Network 10.

Jasmine rejects a rose from Jed and Jed acts like it is completely fine, but you know he will be up at 2am on his Machine Gun Kelly Pinterest account trying to soothe himself.

Jasmine then returns to the group in hopes Thomas gives her a rose. Of course, Thomas gives her a rose, and everyone is furious.

Tash will not this let go, she’s Liam Neeson in Taken and I can’t wait for more. Personally, I’m just loving that The Bachelors have lost all control and the ladies are taking over.

Originally published as The Bachelors are losing power as the women on the show take over