Page 13: Private school student’s vulgar classroom joke rewarded

An elite Melbourne boys’ school student was awarded “joke of the week” for an appalling, vulgar and misogynist gag about girls.

A young student has been applauded for a crude and crass joke made about a girl and a cucumber in class.

Xavier College, where fees range upwards of $30,000 a year, is the latest prestigious private Melbourne boys school to be engulfed in a sexist, misogynistic event.

Page 13 has been made aware of an appalling, and downright unfunny gag about women that was awarded “joke of the week” by a junior teacher in the last week of the school year.

The private school year might be officially over for 2022, but crass and crude stories from elite boys schools are still coming in hot and thick.

Deep sigh.

This week, Page 13 was told a young student was applauded for delivering the following vulgarity to his teacher and classmates:

“How do you know if a girl is hungry or horny?

Let’s just say that the punchline involved a cucumber - but Page 13 has chosen to leave that crude piece of misogyny in the classroom rather than repeat it here.

It is a disgusting indictment of the toxic masculinity being bred behind some school gates.

If this is what is happening in a classroom what chance do children have of changing what can become deeply entrenched values and behaviour, where such sexist and derogatory behaviour is applauded rather than condemned?

Page 13 contacted the school for comment only to find ourselves back in the playground with differing stories.

The crass and crude stories are coming in fast and thick from Xavier College.

After we were sent straight to the principal’s office to be given a rap over the knuckles for daring to ask such questions, it was emphatically (and tersely) denied that such an incident ever took place and that no complaint had been lodged.

It brought to mind a line from Shakespeare we learnt at school: “The lady doth protest too much, methinks.”

Sadly the only lady involved in this instance is the butt of a crude joke.

The following day a spokesman for the Catholic boys school confirmed, yes, the joke did in fact take place in the classroom, but the student was disciplined, not awarded for his behaviour.

Hmmm.

Page 13 was told the “joke of the week” was a harmless part of classroom behaviour and in the 15 or so years it had been conducted, no such vulgarity had ever been displayed.

Double hmmm.

This side of the story is in sharp conflict with what Page 13 was originally told, that the student was applauded and awarded “joke of the week.”

Hence the disgust!

The school told Page 13, “The matter has not been raised by a student or a parent.”

Honestly, it comes as no real surprise. Melbourne’s private boys schools have been under fire in recent years for their negative attitudes and behaviour towards women.

Earlier this year, St Kevins’ students in years seven and eight were found to have made sickening lists ranking the genitalia of the female teachers and how desirable other students’ sisters were.

In 2019, the headmaster of St Kevin’s College in Toorak was forced to apologise after his students were filmed singing the sexist chant “I Wish All The Ladies” on a Melbourne tram. The list goes on and on and on.

When will the schools be schooled?