Developers eyeing Kittens in South Melbourne to turn into high rise

Kittens is known as “the last good strip club in town”, where dancers provide the “girlfriend experience”, but the prime piece of South Melbourne real estate is in a fight to keep its doors open.

Fierce negotiations are underway over renewing the lease on what’s considered ‘the last good strip club in town.’ Picture: Kittens website

The AFL stars, legal eagles and salary types who frequent Melbourne strip club Kittens call it the South Melbourne ballet.

But they could soon be seeing their last dance as developers move to turn the prime South Melbourne real estate site into a high-rise.

Er, no pun intended.

Naked dancers bump and grind to Motley Crue’s Girls, Girls, Girls but could be soon shimmying to Joni Mitchell appropriately singing, “They paved paradise to put up a parking lot”.

But Kittens is not going down easily. Hmmm ... again, poor choice of words.

Page 13 has been told owners and management are in fierce negotiations over renewing the lease on what’s considered “the last good strip club in town.”

It’s not like Kittens hasn’t already had nine lives as King St strip clubs closed and Goldfingers quite literally went up in flames.

King St had its seedy underbelly and punters started taking their bloated wallets and belts elsewhere, as Kittens attracted a more refined clientele.

“It’s not all old blokes leering at chicks on a pole at Kittens. The girls like to hang out more,” said one regular smitten with Kittens perhaps unaware of the club’s exotic dancers providing what is known in the industry as the “girlfriend experience”.

“It was the only place where you could touch skin on skin,” panted another regular, neither of whom wanted to be named.

No surprise there.

But there was a dip and a lip to respectability when Kittens was awarded the title of “Best Gentlemen’s Club” in Australia at the Adult Industry Awards.

With a bit of edge, such as the “wild water fights” promoted on the club’s website, “girl-on-girl shows” and “girls who just want to have fun”.

Police on the scene after shots were fired at Kittens in May 2016. Picture: Mark Dadswell

The club has showed stiff resistance, there we go again, to what is known as the “other rent” around the South Melbourne area.

That’s the “security” demanded by bikies, said to be responsible for a series of drive-by shootings at the venue, with a bouncer injured back in 2016.

But has Kittens nine lives run out?

The regulars said it was the only place where you could still light up a ciggy inside, where wheeling and dealing and picking up a future mistress drew in the big spenders.

“Tradie” invoices and monthly bank statements disguised other “professional” services.

Some wives might have wondered why they weren’t invited when their husbands said they were off to the South Melbourne ballet.

But sometimes it doesn’t pay to know too much.