REVIEW: Motley Crue’s The Dirt is a polluted time capsule of toxic masculinity

Lowering every expectation possible will not prepare you for the depths this biopic can sink as metalhead morons Motley Crue congratulate themselves for all the women they swiftly bedded, shedded and worse.

The next rock biopic to come along after the spectacular success of Queen’s Bohemian Rhapsody, The Dirt was always going to look like dodgy goods.

Nevertheless, lowering every expectation possible will not prepare you for the subterranean depths to which this hapless history of Motley Crue can sink.

These middleweight metal legends made their name in the 1980s by giving in to a lust for sex, drugs and rock’n’roll that should have killed all four members.

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Scene from the feature film The Dirt, now screening in Australia exclusively on Netflix. source: Netflix Originals.

That the band famously lived to tell all of their tawdry tales — most famously in a tone-deaf tell-all that sold like hot cakes in 2001 — is Motley Crue’s only lasting achievement of note.

The book (also titled The Dirt) was one very much of its time, written without a filter or a need to put anything into perspective. It was like reading the toilet wall of every seedy club the Crue played on the Sunset Strip in their hellraising heyday.

However, times have changed. Particularly when it comes to the band’s galling self-congratulation for all the many women they swiftly bedded, shedded and worse.

Scene from the feature film The Dirt, now screening in Australia exclusively on Netflix. source: Netflix Originals.

The downright nasty misogyny of the men of Motley Crue goes unquestioned by the movie adaptation of the book.

In fact, it continues to be celebrated by The Dirt, which seems more concerned by squeezing in more bared-breasts-per-minute than what the band’s appalling treatment of women truly represents.

Just take a look at the scene where Crue drummer Tommy Lee punches his fiancee full-on in the face, and then runs out of the room wailing.

Scene from the feature film The Dirt, now screening in Australia exclusively on Netflix. source: Netflix Originals.

Scene from the feature film The Dirt, now screening in Australia exclusively on Netflix. source: Netflix Originals.

Then look at the rest of the band not moving a muscle to come to the aid of the bleeding woman, let alone even speak to her.

While this is undoubtedly a truly terrible movie, there is a distinct possibility it will find lasting favour with the so-bad-it’s good crowd.

If only for the spurious rolling spectacle of four dudes who cared for nothing unless they could imbibe it, inject it, inhale it or have intercourse with it.

So many substances and women to abuse, so little time for anything else.

— The Dirt is now showing exclusive to Netflix.

THE DIRT (MA15+)

Rating: One star (1 out of 5)

Director: Jeff Tremaine (Jackass: The Movie)

Starring: Douglas Booth, Colson Baker, Daniel Webber, Iwan Rheon, Kathryn Morris, Pete Davidson.

We will, we will … shock you

@leighpaatsch