Your Night In: Every movie on TV tonight rated or slated
Tonight’s movie line-up features everything from Will Ferrell at his funniest and a Cohen brothers’ classic to a surprisingly sophisticated kids’ film and a wild west remake that should be left well alone.
Leigh Paatsch
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LAST CAB TO DARWIN (M)
***
8.30pm Ch. 7
There is no better reason to go and get yourself a life than learning you are about to die. That is the sincerely deep and meaningful takeaway from a tough-skinned, yet tender-hearted tale of a bush taxi driver staring his own demise square in the eye. Michael Caton delivers a flawless portrayal of Rex, a Broken Hill cabbie whose losing battle with cancer sends him on a one-way trip to Darwin. Rex has heard there might be a legal loophole opening up in the NT that will give him access to a medically-supervised euthanasia machine. While not the sentimental type, a few characters Rex meets en route to his expiry date gets him thinking about putting a few things right that he might have gotten wrong. Though running a mite too long, this simple, genuinely affecting tale still forges a strong connection with those receptive to its rustic, no-bulldust demeanour. Co-stars Ningali Lawford-Wolf, Jacki Weaver.
NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN (MA 15+)
*****
9.30PM WORLD MOVIES
This masterpiece from the Coen brothers (Fargo) is a haunting, hard-bitten and incongruously affecting chase flick based on the Cormac McCarthy novel. Josh Brolin stars as a Texan hunter who happens across $2 million in a briefcase, while a frightening Javier Bardem plays a merciless killer out to retrieve the cash. Though several scenes are extremely violent and unapologetically amoral, there is a chilling composure to the film as a whole that will not be denied. Highly recommended.
BRIDGET JONES’S BABY (M)
**
8.30pm Ch. 7
Bridget Jones took a decade-plus holiday from cinemas before belatedly returning with a so-so, middle-of-the-road crowd-pleaser. While Bridget (once again played by Renée Zellweger) is now 43 years old, she is very much the same Ms. Jones: no man, no plan, and no foreseeable change on the near horizon. However, on the far horizon – remember the title of the film – all kinds of changes are on the way. Fast-forward to the middle of the picture where Bridget is pregnant, and not so sure about who the father might be. Two random trysts leave dashing billionaire Jack Quant (Patrick Dempsey) and long-lost love Mark Darcy (Colin Firth) as equally culpable candidates for parenthood. The wait until we finally hear the pitter patter of little feet definitely goes on way too long. Scenes padded out with piffling patter of little consequence push the running time past two hours, which is asking too much of even the most brilliant movie comedies.
SNITCH (M)
**
9.45pm GEM
In Snitch, that likeable lunk Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson puts his serious acting hat on. Just like you, I never knew he owned one. What’s more, it doesn’t seem to fit so good. While this gap in The Rock’s skill set won’t have you liking the lunk any less, it does take the edge off a crime thriller that was never all that sharp to begin with. He plays an everyday dad looking to save his son – facing a stretch in jail – by infiltrating a murderous Mexican drugs cartel. As you (should never) do. There’s a few enjoyable scenes of trucks being driven in anger, and machine-guns being fired very inaccurately. There’s also a lot of scenes where The Rock and the dramatic arts carry on as if they don’t like each other much. Co-stars Susan Sarandon, Barry Pepper.
PUSS IN BOOTS (G)
***1/2
7.30pm GO!
If you have put a line through this one thinking it’s just cashing in on a much-loved minor character from the Shrek stable, you are mistaken. No, this animated film works so hard to engage and entertain an all-ages audience, and therefore earn its keep forthwith. Instead of repeating what we knew and loved of Puss (voiced with purring gusto by Antonio Banderas) from his earlier appearances, a fresh line of attack is taken. The clock is wound back to a pre-Shrek era where Puss was still finding his paws as a cat of action. As an origin tale, it is a sharp and sophisticated piece of storytelling.
TALLADEGA NIGHTS: THE BALLAD OF RICKY BOBBY (M)
**1/2
9.15pm GO!
Will Ferrell delivers the demented goods as a champion NASCAR-driving dunce. Able assistance comes from the great character actor John C. Reilly (Boogie Nights) and the intermittently brilliant Sacha Baron Cohen (Ali G, Borat). Not much more to say than … SHAKE’N’BAKE!!!
WALKING OUT (M)
****
7.40PM WORLD MOVIES
A little movie unfolding on an incongruously large stage, adapted from a short story with a long tale to tell. With such an unorthodox pedigree, it is immediately apparent this is no ordinary screen experience. A bare-bones plot centres on a father (Matt Bomer) and his estranged son (Josh Wiggins), painfully trudging their way back to safety after a hunting accident on a remote mountain range. With its spare use of dialogue and a brusque manner, Walking Out is not going to accommodate the tastes of all viewers. However, there is a steel in its spine and a glint in its eye that will draw the full attention of those who appreciate these rare qualities in films such as The Revenant and Wind River.
MIGHTY JOE YOUNG (G)
**1/2
8.30pm 7FLIX
The world’s biggest gorilla is relocated from his African home to a research institute in America, where he becomes the target of ruthless big-game poachers. Straightforward family entertainment that will cross most age barriers with ease. (Even if repeated use of tranquilliser guns to subdue Joe also seems a little out of place in a light entertainment flick.) Stars Charlize Theron.
THE LONE RANGER (M)
*
7.30PM 7MATE
Even the most ardent admirers of The Lone Ranger – that masked-avenging good guy of the wild west – will concede his appeal to the masses expired 50 years ago. A 21st century revival of this pop-culture dinosaur was always going to be a tough ask for filmmakers. Not to mention a tough sell to audiences. On the evidence presented here, only two words come to mind. Why bother? 147 minutes of some old-timey hooey about corruption on the railways, a psychotic killer cowboy, and Johnny Depp acting all nutty as the title character’s “faithful Indian companion” Tonto. Poor old Armie Hammer as The Lone Ranger is little more than a whiny, wimpy passenger in this wonky-wheeled vehicle. With a $200 million-plus budget to burn, the film keeps grinding away for a spectacle that will have jaws touching floors. Jaws will indeed be extended during The Lone Ranger, but only as part of a yawn.
ZERO DARK THIRTY
****1/2
10.30PM 7MATE
A searing, challenging factual drama all about the US government’s marathon hunt for Osama bin Laden, the most effective terrorist in history. It will take the CIA the best part of a decade to work it out. As a blast from our recent past – reported quite clinically and decidedly powerfully in the present tense – Zero Dark Thirty does not undercharge the explosive nature of its subject matter. Stars Jessica Chastain.
