Your night in: Every movie on Melbourne TV tonight - rated and slated
You might not be able to get your chest waxed during lockdown, but watching Steve Carell wince through it is just what your Friday night in needs. Here’s our guide to what’s on TV tonight.
Leigh Paatsch
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PATRIOTS DAY
***1/2
8.30PM CH. 9
Drama focused on the still-shocking bombing of the finish line at the 2013 Boston Marathon. Any temptation to present this terrible event as entertainment is wisely resisted. Instead, director and co-writer Peter Berg presses on with a search for some enlightenment from this dark place in modern American history. To Berg’s credit, he does indeed find what he is looking for. Particularly with his handling of the compelling and surprisingly rousing aftermath of the incident, where a city-wide manhunt for the two brothers responsible galvanised Boston at a time it could very well have unravelled. Teaming once again with actor Mark Wahlberg, Berg further refines the no-frills docu-drama approach that has served the pair so well in their past two factual collaborations, Deepwater Horizon and Lone Survivor. Co-stars John Goodman, Kevin Bacon.
WILD THINGS (M)
***
9.45PM 7MATE
If you like your movies trashy and trite, chances are you’ll find Wild Things to be the high watermark of such a combination. Bitchy little rich girl Denise Richards falsely accuses high school counsellor Matt Dillon of rape, trailer-trash trampette Neve Campbell backs up her tale, dodgy detective Kevin Bacon finds cause to investigate, and ambulance-chasing lawyer Bill Murray prowls the fringes looking for a way to make an easy buck. Absolutely ridiculous. Absolutely riveting.
TRUE GRIT (M)
****
9.45PM GEM
An exemplary adaptation of the classic Charles Portis novel True Grit sees the Coen brothers doubling back towards some familiar territory. Not quite No Country for Old Men. More No Country for a Young Woman. And a world away from the corny John Wayne version of yesteryear. The story told here is that of a Wild West revenge saga with a difference : the difference being that it is a 14-year-old girl, Mattie Ross (impressive newcomer Hailee Steinfeld) looking to square up the murder of her father in the 1870s. Aiding her cross-country manhunt of a dangerous fugitive are an alcoholic US Marshal (Jeff Bridges) and a sobering Texan bounty hunter (Matt Damon). Rough, tough and riveting stuff.
FANTASTIC MR. FOX (G)
****
7.30PM GO!
A very clever stop-motion animation adaptation of the popular children’s story by the great Roald Dahl (Charlie & the Chocolate Factory). The title character (voiced by George Clooney) is a reluctantly retired poultry thief just itching to return to his old ways. Against the wishes of his wife (Meryl Streep), Mr. Fox does exactly that, and in the process triggers a forest-wide battle with three angry chicken farmers. Though sharper and nervier than Dahl’s original tale, the striking old-school look of the film keeps the wilder impulses of director Wes Anderson (The Royal Tenenbaums) in check. Children will find the tale easy to understand, and the characters are a delight. Better still, there is a sophisticated wit in play that will entertain adults to the very end. A real gem.
THE GOLDEN COMPASS (PG)
**
9.15PM GO!
In an alternate universe, a young girl (impressive newcomer Dakota Blue Richards) ventures towards an icy wasteland to rescue children kidnapped by a sinister secret society. Adapted from the first volume of author Philip Pullman’s His Dark Materials trilogy, this uneven and muddled affair is too compressed and compromised to please viewers of any persuasion. Visual effects and acting are top-notch, however. Co-stars Nicole Kidman, Daniel Craig.
OCEAN’S ELEVEN (M)
****
9.00PM 10 PEACH
Ripping remake of the Sinatra Rat Pack caper comedy from 1960, with George Clooney and Brad Pitt leading an all-star ensemble through a highly energised heist scenario designed to hit Las Vegas’ biggest casinos exactly where they hurt. The end result may not amount to much more than pure escapist entertainment, but this is as tight and bright a jolt of jumped-up joshing-around as you’ll ever encounter. Directed by the ultra-consistent Steven Soderbergh (Traffic, Out of Sight) and co-stars Julia Roberts, Matt Damon and Don Cheadle.
BRIDESHEAD REVISITED (PG)
*1/2
7.30PM WORLD MOVIES
A dull, uninspired and bitsy adaptation of the classic 1945 novel by Evelyn Waugh. The filmmakers were obviously keen to avoid comparisons with the landmark 1981 TV mini-series. However, reducing Waugh’s rich stew of withering social observation and devastating personal lament to a thin gruel of pretty pictures and slight melodramatics was not the way to go about it. Matthew Goode stars as a foppy social climber whose achy-breaky heart belongs to the sister (Hayley Atwell) of his gay best friend (Ben Whishaw). Anyone familiar with the book knows there’s much more to the tale than what little makes the cut here.
THE IRON LADY (PG)
***
10.00PM WORLD MOVIES
The life, times and tirades of former British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher. All that this rather timid portrait of an unequivocally divisive figure offers is yet another chance to marvel at the supreme acting skill of Meryl Streep. Not a single aspect of Thatcher’s formidably complex persona is missed by Streep. While Meryl’s physical impression of the British PM in her blue-bloused prime is bang on the money, it is the way in which she captures Thatcher’s unshakeable inner certainty that really pays off in the film’s favour. And as for Streep’s handling of the Thatcher voice - an imperiously emphatic instrument that makes small talk about the weather sound like a defiant address to the United Nations - the likeness is so exact it is intimidating. Co-stars Jim Broadbent.
THE 40-YEAR-OLD VIRGIN (MA15+)
***
8.45pm 7FLIX
A big, dumb loveable one-joke movie about a super-nerd out to lose his super-celibate status. Not much to it, but if your curiosity is piqued by the title, the goofy, guilty-pleasure laughs will just keep coming. Watch out for that hefty two-hour running time, though. Stars Steve Carell, Catherine Keener.