Fiona Byrne: Anthony Callea talks Australian Idol, marriage and death threats
Since first appearing on our TV screens in 2004, Anthony Callea and his powerhouse voice have won the hearts of Australians across the country. But, he tells Fiona Byrne, he almost didn’t make it onto Australian Idol in the first place.
Fiona Byrne
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Anthony Callea took a reality TV opportunity and turned it into a 15 year career that has seen him top the album charts three times and become one of Australia’s favourite singers.
But Callea, 36, has told of the toll the Australian Idol experience took on him and how has used a recent dark period of self-doubt to fuel his latest single, What’s Wrong With Me.
The track reveals a vulnerability unlike he has presented before.
“I have had some really broken moments and I did get to the point where I wanted to throw it away,” he said.
“I’ve allowed myself to pour my fears and tears into these lyrics. I’m just not going to try and be perfect anymore.”
Callea and I sat down talk Idol, music, death threats, social media, marriage, and the moment of panic that changed his life.
FIONA BYRNE: Anthony, the public first met you in 2004 when you took part in the second season of Australian Idol , but is it true that opportunity almost did not happen?
ANTHONY CALLEA: I actually rocked up to the first year of Idol auditions (2003) and they called my number out, they called my number out three times, and I had a bit of a panic moment. I never got out of my seat and when I eventually did get out of my seat I walked straight out of the holding room, so I never auditioned. That year for me personally was a pretty dark year. I remember not even speaking for a good three or four months. I was trying to find myself, I was trying to deal with my sexuality. I remember my dad sitting on the end of my bed going, ‘There is nothing wrong with you, you are not sick, you have not hurt anyone, so what do I need to do to get you through this?’ He set me up with a great psychologist who I saw for a good three or four months on a weekly basis and he allowed me to just get to a point where I was comfortable with myself. When I actually did audition for Idol the next year I really wanted it. I really wanted it.
FB: So in a sense that panic attack changed you life by giving you a year to become stronger and more confident.
AC: When I look back at that (year) I am glad that (dark period) happened because had I not been through that I would not have been ready mentally, psychologically, or physically to sustain myself for the three and a half months that the show went for.
FB: We often hear how gruelling reality TV is for contestants. What sort of toll did Idol take on you?
AC: It was full on. I ended up in hospital on the show. It was in the third week. An ambulance picked me up from the home we were staying in, in Sydney. I don’t remember the ambulance collecting me because I was so stressed. They thought there could have been something seriously wrong with me like meningococcal disease. They gave me two lumbar punctures in the emergency room. Then they realised I was just very stressed. I remember the producer coming into the hospital, I think it was the morning of the show that night, and he said: “You are still in hospital, the rule is if you can’t perform this week we have to bring back the person from the week prior,” and my dad, who was there, looked at me and said: “You can do this”. I went to the studio that night, I was still not well, and performed and as soon as I finished my performance I ran off stage and threw up in a bin.
FB: Is it true you took part in the Grand Final show at the Sydney Opera House despite having had a death threat made against you?
AC: Yes. At the time it was definitely scary. A note was delivered to the house where we were staying and it was taken seriously by the production. You never know if it was an idiot playing a prank or someone wanting to cause real trouble. I had security with me in the days leading up to the final. On the night they changed the way Casey (Donovan) and I arrived at the Opera House stairs. For a TV spectacle they wanted us to walk down the red carpet and touch fans but instead we were put in the back of a car flanked by security and we just waved as we driven to the stairs. I have nothing but praise for the show and the way they looked after us and nurtured us.
FB: You released The Prayer after being runner-up on Idol, and it became a massive hit even though people warned you against performing that song.
AC: So many people told me not to do that song. I performed it during Artist’s Choice week. They wanted to see an edgier side to me but because I am stubborn and because I like breaking rules sometimes I went, ‘stuff that’. I wanted to do my interpretation of that song and I am thankful that it resonated with so many people. I am still proud of it and I still love singing it.
FB: Some performers hate their audience recording their show with iPhones. Where do you stand on that?
AC: Over the years I have realised I sing that song (The Prayer) to more camera phones than I do faces. As soon as the music starts, up come the phones. My take is that is their way of enjoying it and if they want to take a piece of it home with them they have every right to. I go to concerts and at times I get my phone out and record something so I can’t tell people off for doing that.
FB: Your new single, What’s Wrong With Me, is about self-doubt and self-discovery. What drove those feelings?
AC: I have questioned myself over the past couple of years and I have had some really broken moments and I did get to the point where I wanted to throw it away. I lost my drive for a while and hated that fact that I was angry. Why am I angry? Why am I snapping at the people I love? Why am I always tired? Why do I want more? Why am I embarrassed of myself? Why can’t be happy with where I am in life? These have been the questions that have clouded my mind for a while now and at times have been debilitating. It’s always confronting being honest with yourself, but I’ve learnt that I had to go through this to be where I am today. The self-doubt, I think will always be there but that’s OK, I’m cool with that.
FB: Have you answered those questions?
AC: I’m just not going to try and be perfect anymore. I’m not going to try and say the right thing or do the right thing or try and be someone that I’m not. I’m too old for that sh*t and I look forward to having a long life and career ahead of me where I can just be me. I’m in a really good place now, I think because I’ve taken control and I’ve chosen to be. I also owe a lot of my happiness to Tim, my beautiful, talented and patient husband. I’m content and feel at ease and that’s why I am ready for this song to be heard. I haven’t released music since 2017 and even though my last two albums went to Number 1, I just knew I had to take a step back for a while, before I stood behind the microphone again. So, I’ve been writing music of late and I’ve allowed myself to pour my fears and tears into these lyrics.
FB: You and your husband Tim Campbell are just about to celebrate your fifth wedding anniversary. What makes your relationship work?
AC: We are chalk and cheese and that is why it works. I am not going to sit here and lie. Yes, we have had our moments, of course, but that is any relationship. There have definitely been some testing times because I know I am not the easiest person to live with. But we make it work and the reason why it works is because we both want it to work. We have the right intentions. I never want to hurt him and he never wants to hurt me. At the root of it all is communication, transparency, being honest and being respectful, they are the keys. And also it is OK not to agree on everything, as long as we are on the same page moving forward in terms of his work, my work, our lifestyle together. I would not be able to do what I do without him. I know that. I know that I am a strong enough person to be able to stand on my own two feet but the thought of actually doing that without Tim, I don’t want that.
FB: How does social media impact you as a performer?
AC: Social media is totally driving how we perceive life these days. You get booked to do a gig and you are asked how many Instagram followers do you have and can you do this many posts. I am like: “No, I am a singer.” I don’t live by my social media numbers every day. More and more these days social media platforms come into play when you are negotiating deals.
FB: You are performing the national anthem at Flemington on Melbourne Cup Day. After recent revelations about animal cruelty did you think about pulling out of the gig?
AC: I had to think long and hard about it over a few days. Anyone watching that footage (on the ABC’s 7.30 program) would have been affected by it. I believe that we all should have a better awareness and support a movement in the industry towards positive change and ensuring that this appalling behaviour is eradicated. I am donating my performance fee to an equine welfare and rehabilitation organisation. I know this will not make everyone happy, but I hope in a time of differing opinions across many aspects of our society, that the singing of the national anthem will unite us in our differences, and help celebrate and showcase my hometown of Melbourne.
FB: Are you looking for new challenges?
AC: I definitely would like to work in radio one day. I have got a mouth and I am not afraid to use it and it gets me in trouble at times. I love live radio, I love live TV. You have to be present in that moment and you only have one chance and there is something exciting about that. It is definitely a world I would like to explore. For the moment I want to get back to the core of me and express myself in music and tour because that is where I feel most at home. I love walking out on stage
FB: How do you prepare for a show.
AC: Five minutes before I go on stage I have a ritual where I need to go for my little ciggie — I usually just have two puffs — and I have a nip of scotch. I am not one of those singers who do warm ups, I never have. To me singing is meant to come from emotion. I try to keep healthy, I swim on every show day. And I have to be by myself just before I go out on stage.
FB: Do you have any advice for people keen to take part in talent driven reality TV?
AC: Go with your gut instinct, make sure you have people around you who you can trust, listen to their advice, does it mean it is always right, no, but make the decision that is right for you and once you make that decision, own it and be accountable for it. Also know your strengths and weaknesses and be honest with yourself.
What’s Wrong With Me is available now.