How parents can career counsel and guide their child to choose a good job

Career advisers reveal the best ways parents can tackle career conversations with their children, including what to say when they don’t like their child’s choice.

They say the children today will be working in jobs that do not yet exist, making an already tough task tougher for parents to help their child make good career choices.

Career practitioners Kate Flaherty and Helen Green say whether your child has no idea, an inkling or has their mind set on a future career, keeping conversations positive and ongoing is important.

“Many young people I see are anxious about not knowing what their ‘occupation’ will be and often parents become anxious about this too,” Green says.

“Removing this anxiety is important as there are arguably many advantages to having multiple interests.”

Flaherty says some teens are keen to talk, but parents should not worry if they shut down.

“Sometimes it’s hard to talk about the future,” she says.

“The research is that adolescents can’t see too far into the future, their brain doesn’t work that way.

“There are some strategies that work.”

WHERE TO START

Green, director of Career Confident, says to encourage your child to be curious, asking questions such as “Are there people you admire in the community?” or “What problems are you keen to solve?” as well as “Do you like working with your hands or prefer to write and research?”.

St Aloysius College student Angelica Alfaro, 15, looks through career brochures with her mum Alicia to help her make her future job and study choices. Picture: Tricia Watkinson

Flaherty says it is important to find impartial information.

University websites, for example, may provide information about the marks required to be accepted but their information can be biased, as ultimately they want students to enrol.

WHEN THEY KNOW WHAT THEY WANT TO DO

If you think their choice will be too hard, such as job vacancies are few or high grades are required to enrol, consider providing information in related careers.

“Having a goal to work towards can be very motivating for young people and for many career paths, there are several pathways available and opportunities to have more than one attempt,” Green says.

“Just because a field is projected to be declining should not mean it is automatically disregarded if your child is very keen, though I’d encourage them to think broadly.”

Remember employability skills such as communication, teamwork, initiative, problem solving and self-management are increasingly more important than occupation-specific skills.

“As parents, helping your child develop these skills and resilience will hold them in good stead,” Green says.

Alicia Alfaro, mum of Angelica, 15, agrees focusing on soft skills and interests is a good place to start.

She has had career discussions with her daughter, as being in Year 10 at St Aloysius College she will soon choose senior subjects as well as complete work experience.

“You never know what’s going to happen, the thing everyone knows from this whole pandemic is she could set a plan to where she wants to go but everything can change,” she says.

“I want to make sure she knows transferable skills, soft skills are going to be really important for whatever she wants to do.”

Her advice also has been to not base decisions on what she is good at.

“Go for whatever your heart says,” Alfaro says.

“You don’t have to stick (it) your whole life, you can change.”

WHEN THEY DON’T KNOW WHAT THEY WANT TO DO

Flaherty, a Career Development Association of Australia national executive committee member, says to have lots of conversations about their interests.

Get your child to talk to friends parents, or your own friends, if their jobs sound interesting.

“Having a real-world experience is really important,” she says.

“Sometimes it takes people to get out of that school system and into the world to find out that they didn’t like that.”

Green says doing a broadbased degree or a double-degree allows them to try different streams and get exposure through internships or volunteering.

“In my experience, pushing a profession or course on a young person who is not ready for it, or interested, rarely ends well,” she says.

WHEN YOU DON’T LIKE THEIR CHOICES/IDEAS

Keep conversations positive, encourage them to seek real-life examples and people to chat to, attend open days with them and point them towards career resources.

“Avoid negative commentary about their suggestions or their suitability for undertaking a particular course,” Green says.

“As a parent, I know how challenging it can be to be impartial and not make sweeping generalisations about an occupation or sector, especially if you feel it doesn’t suit them.”

Saying, “That sounds interesting, let’s find out more about it” is more constructive than saying, “You shouldn’t do that” or “There’s no possibility of that”, Flaherty says.

“Generate other possibilities,” she says.

“It’s important to let them go down that track and make the decision themselves.”

Originally published as How parents can career counsel and guide their child to choose a good job