Dani Laidley’s children found out about gender identity via Snapchat accident

Former AFL player and coach Dani Laidley has revealed how a Snapchat mishap led to her accidentally sharing her true gender identity with her daughters.

Dani Laidley has revealed that her daughters found out about her true gender identity through accidental Snapchat messages.

The 56-year-old former AFL player and coach is set to open up on her story in the upcoming Stan documentary Revealed – Danielle Laidley: Two Tribes to be released on Tuesday September 19.

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The Daily Mail has reported the documentary states that in 2019, Laidley sent her daughters an image of herself with a face full of makeup, wearing a white button up shirt with a black belt and black thigh-high boots.

She also sent other photos focused on her face with makeup and fake eyelashes on.

Laidley said that when the photos were sent, she had been keeping her gender identity secret from all but a few friends.

She added that when she sent the images, she was living alone and used Snapchat to keep in touch with her children.

“I sort of started to live my life as me with a small group of friends, but not in front of my children,” Laidley said.

“I would try my darnedest to keep the two very separate.

“I was learning how to use Snapchat. Because that’s how I communicated particularly with the girls every day.

“And one Sunday morning, I was learning how to do it. I didn’t have my glasses on …

“Instead of pressing save, I pressed send. They got pictures of me.”

Dani Laidley accidentally sent the image on the right. Photo: Getty Images and Stan

Unfortunately, Laidley revealed that was when her daughters cut off all contact with her, although her son Kane still has a close relationship with her.

Laidley added that when she sent the images, she was battling drug addiction, before spiralling into depression, even revealing she had attempted suicide.

Laidley’s gender identity became public knowledge in 2020 when she was arrested and charged for stalking but an image, which showed Laidley wearing a dress, blonde wig and make up from custody, was shared in a WhatsApp group.

Laidley’s lawyer announced she had transitioned in November 2020, sharing Laidley’s wish to be referred to henceforth as Dani.

In 2022, Laidley reached a confidential settlement with Victoria Police after seeking “aggravated and exemplary” damages for being “brought into public ridicule and contempt”.

“I hated who I was,” Laidley said in the documentary’s trailer.

“In the AFL it was always, ‘he’s the gay footballer’, and I would think, ‘you wait until you hear about me’.

“There’s no doubt that the people around me and the AFL saved my life.

“I’m proud of who I am and who I’m becoming.

“I’ve always felt on the inside how I appear now on the outside, so what you see now is me.”

Dani Laidley and partner Donna Leckie. Picture: Jake Nowakowski.

Laidley returned to the football fold in 2021 when she returned to North Melbourne.

Speaking on Triple M at the time, Laidley thanked the football community for its support.

“It’s been a tough road to here but I’ve just been really overwhelmed just by the support of the wider AFL community,” she said.

“You live in fear and shame and embarrassment for years and then to come out like it did, it’s been really tough on my family, but now, to a person, it’s been great.

“They accept me for who I am, the person I am now, and hopefully there’s a lot of life to live.”

Originally published as Dani Laidley’s children found out about gender identity via Snapchat accident