DJ and writer Claire Knight shares what it’s like to be diagnosed with ADHD as an adult

Em Rusciano, Abbie Chatfield, Mia Freedman - they’re just some of the many Australian women now discovering they have been living with undiagnosed ADHD. What are the signs?

Making endless lists, losing track of time, avoiding boring tasks, mind constantly racing?

For Claire Knight these seemingly common character traits turned out to be hallmarks of a condition affecting a surprising - and rising - number of Australian women.

At the age of 35 the DJ and freelance writer was formally diagnosed earlier this year with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD).

In hindsight, she had suspected for almost a decade that there was more to her forgetfulness, procrastination and inability to watch a movie from start to finish “but I did the ADHD thing of putting it off”.

Now she is joining high-profile Australian women, including Em Rusciano, Abbie Chatfield and Mia Freedman, in sharing how she finally came to understand that her brain works differently.

“I had my doubts about being judged for having it (or) am I jumping on a bandwagon. Definitely a lot of people think it’s a fad or a trend,” Claire says.

“But more people are being diagnosed because more people are actually aware that this is a thing that exists, and are relating to it.”

DJ and freelance writer Claire Knight was diagnosed with ADHD at age 35. Photo: Rachel Dray

THE RISE OF ADULT ADHD

About one in 20 Australian adults are believed to have the neurodevelopmental condition, according to ADHD Australia.

They have trouble with time management, controlling impulses, regulating emotions or focusing their attention because of differences in their brain structure and connectivity.

These symptoms are persistent and have a negative impact on aspects of daily life.

Historically boys were more likely to be diagnosed because they displayed obvious symptoms like fidgeting, disruptive behaviour or outbursts.

It is now understood that girls may show different symptoms, such as being overly talkative or emotionally reactive.

Under-diagnosis of girls is one factor thought to be driving a wave of adult women receiving late diagnoses as awareness grows about the spectrum of symptoms and how these look in adulthood.

Many women are first learning about ADHD through social media, and find it worsens after having children or entering menopause.

A national inquiry has heard people are self-diagnosing and resorting to black-market drugs due to long waits and high costs to see a specialist for diagnosis.

THE EARLY SIGNS FOR CLAIRE

The stereotypical child with ADHD is seen as a troublesome whirlwind who can’t concentrate or sit still.

“I would totally think it would be the kids at school that are the class clowns that can’t focus and are constantly fidgeting,” Claire said.

“That was my idea of what it was and I was like ‘I don’t have that’.”

Rather than bouncing off the walls, Claire - who grew up in Adelaide before moving interstate in her 20s - was more of a daydreamer and “better at classes that I was more interested in, like art and drama”.

“I got my work done mostly on time. I had this fear of letting people down which I think helps me out with meeting deadlines,” she said.

SYMPTOMS IN ADULTHOOD

Over the years many people with undiagnosed ADHD develop ways to mask or cope with behaviours.

But ADHD can show up in adults as low self-esteem, a messy house or desk, avoiding tasks like updating health insurance or filing tax returns, road rage or impatience waiting in lines.

Claire stresses that everyone’s experience with ADHD is different but for her there are some clear and consistent traits.

These include procrastinating, over-committing her time, “time blindness”, being forgetful, impulsive and “easily bored”.

She also struggles to relax and is fidgety when it’s time to go to sleep.

“Unless I’m super absorbed in something my brain goes a million places every minute,” Claire said.

“I do have to make a lot of lists. I have to have reminders for everything. The notes section of my phone is just out of control.

DJ Claire Knight says she has carved out a career that works with her ADHD tendencies, rather than against them. Photo: Robert Agostino

“I switch between tasks often, dropping a task before it’s finished and moving on to something else.

“I have random bursts of energy and need to get things done, or I’m in complete sloth mode - there is no in between.”

Claire adds that she’s “not very good at waiting” and cannot “understand why people would ever queue up for something if they don’t have to”.

She has noticed there are a few inconsistencies with ADHD behaviours, like the fact she hates being interrupted “but will interrupt other people” or that she is bothered by others being loud but is often loud herself.

“Noisy spaces are a big trigger for me, which is kind of ironic because I’m a DJ,” Claire said.

“However when I’m performing I’m doing something I love and am super interested in. I also have control of the music - there’s not competing sounds.”

Another common symptom is what is known as ADHD paralysis which Claire describes as feeling like “I have a million things to do but I can’t do anything right now”.

GETTING A DIAGNOSIS

Claire first spoke to a GP about her symptoms in 2014 and was given a referral to a psychiatrist but “did the ADHD thing of putting it off”.

“At that point in time I was maybe a bit embarrassed at the concept of being a bit neurodiverse,” she said.

In 2021 Claire “got serious about it” and returned to the GP, where she was given a survey about her behaviours now and in childhood.

Her answers were sent to an Adelaide-based psychiatrist who Claire spoke with over two lengthy telehealth appointments, costing about $900 and $600.

The psychiatrist also spoke to her partner before delivering a diagnosis in February.

“I suspected I had it for ages but there was something (stopping me). I’d slap myself on the wrist and say ‘no you don’t, just because it’s trendy to have ADHD’. But now an actual qualified psychiatrist has said ‘You have it’ I’m leaning into it,” she said.

WHAT NEXT?

Claire was prescribed medication which she took initially but is not sure it is right for her.

It would take about an hour to kick in and for a few hours it would induce “an insatiable need to get things done”.

“My brain turned into a super-computer. What in my life has loose ends that need to be tied up?” she said.

“It did focus me but then I felt like I would come down from it and then feel like I had nothing left in the tank.”

“Medication works for lots of people. For me the juice isn’t worth the squeeze.”

THE UPSIDE

Undiagnosed ADHD symptoms can be frustrating or distressing. But once people know what’s driving their behaviours there are many ways to harness the condition.

Research has shown people with ADHD are often more creative, innovative, courageous and willing to experiment.

Their tendency to hyper focus on topics of interest also means many become specialists and leaders in their field.

“I probably know dozens of people with ADHD, the majority of which are in creative industries,” Claire said.

“Conversations can be particularly fun and engaging between ADHDers because we can match each others’ levels of excitement, interest and quick thinking.”

Finally learning she has ADHD gave Claire “permission to actually let myself be like ‘OK, this relates to me’ and look at what other people do and how they cope with it.”

Originally published as DJ and writer Claire Knight shares what it’s like to be diagnosed with ADHD as an adult