Qlder’s guide to surviving winter: Blanket forts and conspiracy theories

From cracking out our wildest coats to going full conspiracy theory, we take a not-so-serious look at how Qlders handle the cold.

Winter is well and truly here … and Queenslanders are doing what Queenslanders do when it gets cold.

From cracking out our wildest coats to going full conspiracy theory on the sun, we take a not-so-serious look at how the sunshine state handles winter.

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People struggling in the wild windy weather on the Grey St Bridge, Brisbane. Picture Steve Pohlner

The Great Winter Wardrobe overhaul

Us Queenslanders dust off their winter wardrobes, revealing a collection of barely-worn jackets and scarfs that see more action in a single week than they have in the past year.

The fashion parade includes beanies that are more decorative than functional, and Ugg boots that make their annual pilgrimage from the back of the closet.

The Battle of the Thermostat: A Family Saga

To heat or not to heat?

The thermostat becomes the battleground for familial warfare, with one member cranking it up to tropical levels while another insists on saving energy by layering up like an onion.

The compromise? A household-wide agreement to wear socks with sandals indoors.

How do you layer up? Picture: Liam Kidston

The Art of Layering: Queensland Style

Layering in Queensland is a comedic affair, with locals donning everything from singlets under hoodies to shorts paired with knee-high socks.

The result is a fashion statement that screams “I’m ready for anything,” even if that anything is just a mild breeze.

The quest for the perfect hot beverage

The search for the ultimate winter warmer leads to experimental concoctions that could rival a barista’s worst nightmare, with ingredients like marshmallows, cinnamon, and a hint of desperation.

Coffee shops become the new social hubs, where everyone debates the merits of chai lattes versus hot chocolates.

Qlders are known to be tough … except when it gets cold. Picture: Liam Kidston

Winter sports: Queensland edition

Forget skiing and snowboarding; Queensland’s winter sports include the daring early morning beach walk and the adrenaline-pumping task of defrosting the car windscreen.

Locals boast about their ‘extreme’ winter adventures, which mostly involve brisk walks to the corner store.

Wildest winter fits as SEQ lashed with icy blast

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The mysterious disappearance of the sun

As the days shorten and clouds occasionally obscure the sun, Queenslanders react as if they’ve been plunged into eternal darkness.

Sunglasses are still worn as a precautionary measure, just in case the sun decides to make a surprise appearance.

The great blanket fort revival

Adults rediscover the childhood joy of building blanket forts, transforming living rooms into cosy sanctuaries complete with fairy lights and an abundance of pillows.

It’s the perfect retreat for binge-watching TV shows while pretending the outside world doesn’t exist.

Complaints flood social media at this time of the year, leaving many to ponder if they need to get away. Picture: Richard Walker

The Social Media Chronicles: Winter complaints

Social media feeds are flooded with exaggerated tales of winter woes, featuring memes of penguins and polar bears to illustrate the ‘frigid’ conditions.

Friends from colder climates roll their eyes as Queenslanders lament the need for a second layer of clothing.

The annual Heater Hunt

As temperatures dip, the frantic search for heaters begins, with stores selling out faster than a Boxing Day sale.

Those lucky enough to snag a heater become the envy of the neighbourhood, hosting impromptu gatherings around their new-found source of warmth.

Originally published as Qlder’s guide to surviving winter: Blanket forts and conspiracy theories