The adventures of the Gold Coast light rail

From sniffing glue to threats of violence, Ryan Keen has seen it all on Gold Coast trams. But there was one night when it all became too much.

You take your chances at times on the Gold Coast light rail. I know – I’m a fan.

It’s very convenient as an alternative to driving when those after work knock-off “networking” functions and engagements carry on past when you intended. Often.

I can see where Cr Hermann Vorster is coming from with calls for a marshal service to deal with riff-raff.

I’ve seen all sorts – youth sniffing glue, weirdos seat hopping and trying to chat with strangers which make them uncomfortable and no doubt yearn for the next stop so they can get off.

I once saw two teen boys discussing how they would love to “knock out” some other kid they didn’t know on the same carriage who happened to be randomly looking their way.

Cr Hermann Vorster is calling for a marshal service to deal with Gold Coast light rail riff-raff. Picture: Jerad Williams

“Why do you keep staring?” one kept yelling at the other kid who was bewildered by the hostility. A mate of Mr Hostility murmured he wished Mr Bewildered had a friend so he could “crack” him too.

In the end, they both slunk off when their stop arrived with no harm done.

The strangest moment I’ve had was just before midnight on a final tram out of Broadwater Parklands.

A giant of a man wigging out on who knows what was up the front and the only other passenger – aside from a guy sitting across from me up the back listening to music.

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Mr Wiggy was screaming about some sort of internal struggle only he could understand before he charged full sprint down the centre aisle in our direction as the tram lurched forward.

I tensed for action, looked at the bloke across me whose music was up too loud to notice and said “Hey mate, I think we’re on here.”

Mr Wiggy stopped on a dime two metres from what would have been an ugly scene. And then carried on screaming to himself.

Myself and Mr DJ looked at each other, and both exited next stop. “Bugger that,” Mr DJ said.