Ann Wason Moore: Now's the time for Prime Minister Scott Morrison to change legacy
Prime Minister Scott Morrison needs to act now to change his legacy, writes Ann Wason Moore.
Gold Coast
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IT was not the Prime Minister’s finest moment.
Slightly sweaty, very defensive, highly uncomfortable, I watched as Scott Morrison was grilled by journalist Tracy Grimshaw over his handling - or mishandling - of allegations of rape, harassment and sexism in his own (Parliament) House.
And I wondered … is this really the way he wants to live his life?
As a professed devout Christian, if Mr Morrison’s Maker calls him home tomorrow, is this how he would choose to be remembered? Are his words and actions, or lack thereof, those upon which he wishes to be judged? And judged not just by his earthly constituents, but his own Higher Power.
To be clear, I don’t think Scomo is in danger of eternal damnation, if such a thing exists, but his management of these scandals is a reminder that every word, every action and every day counts - as a politician and as a person.
Forgive me for being so dramatically philosophical, but we’ve been dealing with some big questions in our house over the last couple of weeks.
Because on March 8, as I was preparing to attend an International Women’s Day event, there was a knock on my door.
It was my nephew, who is also my neighbour, with his eyes red and his hands shaking. He’d come to tell me that the police were at his house because his father - my brother-in-law, Ken - had been found deceased.
Ken, who was babysitting my children just two nights before. Ken, who was building a new deck for his family just the day prior. Ken, who was driving to deliver a bed for his wife when it happened.
Driving down the Gold Coast Highway, we don’t know exactly what occurred, but something caused Ken to pull over, where he then suffered a brain aneurysm and passed away.
There was no warning sign, no chance of preparation - for himself, nor any of us. Ken was here. And then he was gone.
But what a legacy he has left behind.
Those three days leading up to his last are symbolic of all those that came before - a life spent working in service for others. And always, always, with a smile - because Ken was the epitome of kind and gentle.
I’ve never experienced a sudden death before. Though I’ve lost many close to me, including my own father when I was just a teenager, there was always time to say goodbye. There was time to right the wrongs and to make peace before they were at peace.
We were granted none of that with Ken. But, because he was Ken, we didn’t need it.
My last moments with him were in the wee hours of a Sunday morning, as my husband and I returned home from a rare boozy night out.
There sat Ken on our couch, quietly watching TV as his wife Jacinta snoozed on his shoulder.
We thanked them profusely and apologised for being so late, saying again how truly wonderful it is to have close family living across the street - and not just for the free babysitting.
Ken beamed his smile and said they’d had a great night, and what fun he had with the kids - they’d played tennis on the street, talked about going to the beach the next day and he’d happily suffered a series of practical jokes played upon him.
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Days later, as my son grappled with this loss, he told me his great comfort was the last conversation he’d had with Ken, how on that Saturday night he was asking Ken all about his life (with special focus on 1970s haircuts and moustaches) and they’d had a long and deep (for a 13-year-old) chat.
Mortality is a tough concept for anyone to understand, but especially children. And my own are struggling.
How lucky am I then, to have Ken as the example to show them of not just how to live but how to die. It didn’t matter when his time was up, the integrity of his words and actions meant he was always ready - even if we weren’t. He embodied the idea of living each day as if it’s the last.
He savoured the goodness of life, big and small - in sport, in travel, in his garden, in his family. And when he said his last goodbye that Monday morning, it was with a smile on his face and in service to others. His last day was the same as every other. There was no need for reparations, for apologies … just our own want for him to still be here.
The world is a poorer place without Ken it it. But perhaps, at the end of his days, his life could be a lesson not just to my children, but to our leaders. Every word, every action, every day counts.
BRUTAL TRUTH ABOUT ‘LOCKER ROOM TALK’
Don’t forget the boys.
As the social shockwaves from this week’s March 4 Justice continue to shake our nation to its core, we must remember to embrace equal opportunity.
It’s not just a matter of encouraging our daughters to speak and our sons to listen, but teaching our boys to use their own voice to advocate for their sisters.
From misogyny to sexual violence to domestic violence, breaking the cycle can start with our sons.
Look at Brisbane Boys’ College student captain Mason Black, who has implored his classmates to “stop being boys, be human”.
The teenager drew on horrific abuse inflicted on his own mother and said changing the systemic violence begins with his generation “putting an end to slurs and derogatory comments about women”.
“If you have ever objectified a woman based on her looks, talked about females in a misogynistic way, or taken advantage without consent, you are part of the problem,” he said.
“Seemingly harmless comments can have such devastating effects.
“Boys, don’t allow yourself to slip into complacent denial by disregarding the seriousness of this issue.”
The fact is that the euphemism of ‘locker room talk’, as so crassly described by Donald Trump, is really just misogyny. And boys who are socialised into this behaviour are one step down the dangerous path of looking the other way when their mate sexually or physically assaults a woman - or, worse, uses their own body against a woman’s.
And while this week has been traumatic, there is so much hope.
While our Prime Minister might have refused to listen to the very women he represents, our own men are not.
Just look at Mason Black.
And even closer to home there is a crew of Gold Coasters who are not just talking the talk but literally getting on their bikes to make a difference.
Tweed Heads Hospital emergency doctor Bruce Beal is leading a cycling group of teen boys and his own daughter on a 1200km ride across Tasmania to raise awareness and funds to help victims of domestic violence.
Because for Dr Beal, he sees the damage daily in his workplace.
“I see the victims of domestic violence in ER very regularly. And I see the children of DV too, the young adults whose mental health has been compromised from that trauma. Suicides, cutting, self-harming … there is an explosion in these cases.
“It’s extremely difficult, knowing that I’m there to see to their wounds but I can’t fix the problem. I bandage them up and send them home … and then too often I see them come back. Domestic violence is an incredibly difficult situation for them to escape.
“I always ask if they want me to involve the police, but very rarely do they say ‘absolutely’, more common is they don’t want the police involved - there’s shame and fear that is holding them back.
“We now have a system where we can call a social worker, even in the middle of the night, so that they have the time to sit and spend with the client so they can talk through the process. As a doctor you have to keep moving to the next patient, and that is very difficult.”
The Ride for DV will benefit Australia’s first non-profit law firm, New Way Lawyers, which specialises in family law and DV cases. The firm is based in southeast Queensland with an office in Burleigh.
With two of his teenage sons, their friend and his daughter accompanying Dr Beal on the ride, he says critical conversations are now being had in his own family.
He says preparing for the ride at the same time as the March 4 Justice movement grips the country has helped his sons, daughters and their friends to realise the reality facing so many women.
“I think adolescent boys hear more derogatory comments about girls than the girls themselves, especially in those private boys-only settings. This is an opportunity for me to say: son, that’s when you step up and call it out.
“My children have never been exposed to the factors that create a domestic violence setting, although my wife grew up in a family where that occurred. We’re now having conversations about that and I can see that not just this ride but our words and their future actions will make a difference.”
Let’s hear it for the boys.
‘DAD HAD TO TELL ME WOMEN WEREN’T ALLOWED TO BE LIFESAVERS’
CAROL Fox knows how to be in the right place at the right time.
It’s a talent that saw her become the first female surf lifesaving beach guard in Victoria, a talent that saw her become president of Women Sport Australia and named one of the most influential women in the country … and it’s even a talent that saw her escape Melbourne just months before COVID locked down the Victorian capital.
Now Carol, whose career in elite sport performance has informed her role as a confident communication expert, finds herself based on the Gold Coast at a time when the city is tipped to be named co-host of the 2032 Olympic Games — an opportunity that could just combine all of her talents at one place at one time.
Named as an Australian Financial Review 100 Women of Influence in 2019 for her work with Women Sport Australia, where she advocated for gender equality across wages, facilities and leadership, Carol has spent 30 years collaborating with all levels of sport, government agencies and corporate organisations to coach leaders to become more effective communicators.
And when she looks around her new home state of Queensland, she can see there is some work to be done.
“I can see there is so much potential here at a grassroots sporting level in regards to women’s leadership in sport that is waiting to be unlocked,” says Carol, who was also a national level swimmer and water polo player.
“In Victoria there is the Change our Game initiative and New South Wales has Her Sport Her Way. Both provide a range of grants and funding to support women and girls in sport and that’s what would be good to see happening here.
“It’s great to see women at the elite sporting level getting more attention and better pay, but real change starts at the bottom.
“We need to see women in leadership roles at a club level if we want to see the flow-on effects really take hold, and right now is perfect timing considering the young people of the Gold Coast have just over a decade until it looks like the Games will be in their city.
“We need to see women as umpires, as referees, as presidents, on boards and commenting in the media because having women active at every level gives girls such a better chance to get engaged in sport and stay engaged.”
Carol has long walked her own talk, ever since discovering as a child that half the population was excluded from surf lifesaving.
That childhood realisation sparked a lifetime of advocacy for gender equality.
“My older brother and other boys from my swimming squad went down to Lorne Surf Life Saving Club and I remember turning to my dad and saying ‘I can’t wait until I’m old enough to be a lifesaver’ … and my darling Dad had to break the news to me that women were not allowed to be surf lifesavers.
“I always remember back to that moment, the shock that we were excluded just because we were female. Even now I think about the concept and it still flabbergasts me. This wasn’t a sport either, this was a volunteer organisation providing a community service — and they were excluding women.
“I am proud to say that women were integrated into the surf lifesaving movement very quickly once the doors were opened though. In fact, on International Women’s Day this year Life Saving Victoria celebrated its first female-majority board. It has also achieved gender parity across its volunteer base and professional staff.”
Yet just a few years after Carol joined lifesaving, history was repeating itself — this time as Carol pursued her dream to become a paid lifeguard.
Ultimately becoming the first female employed in that role in Victoria, Carol says it was not always an easy path to forge.
“Once the Sex Discrimination Act was brought in, they had to employ people based on merit, not gender. And thank goodness I had the merit for the job,” says Carol.
“But it was bloody hard work being the first to knock down those walls again and again. It was the same when I wanted to compete in surf lifesaving carnivals alongside my brother and friends.”
While working as a lifeguard, Carol was also studying, eventually completing her Master in Arts (Human Movement), with a thesis that focused on gender barriers to elite coaching positions.
It was during this time of advocacy and education that Carol says she started suffering from exhaustion.
“The more research I did, the more life I lived, I was just angry. Angry that being a woman was still a barrier when it comes to success, especially within sports,” she says.
“Eventually I had adrenal exhaustion, I couldn’t keep my energy at that level all the time.
“And then I realised that being angry is no way to communicate your point anyway. When someone is angry and screeching at you, you don’t hear their message.
“I decided to stop being angry and to start a conversation. Instead of fighting, it was time to ask questions … and that’s something I would love to see more women and men do.
“Right now, it’s really hard not to be angry. You hear the reports out of Canberra and it’s difficult not to call it out in an angry manner. But when we do that, we waste our energy, people stop listening … it’s time to ask the questions.
“I want to encourage everyone to get curious about why things are the way they are, to keep asking, keep highlighting it, but in a calm manner … that’s how we’ll change things. You can see the paradigm shifting already.
“I think if we see everything as a challenge and a fight, we do a disservice to our male champions and friends, it becomes exclusionary. We need them asking the questions right alongside us.”
Since moving to the Gold Coast last year, Carol says it’s taken no time to make new friends in this city — men and women alike.
And now she’s ready to formulate a game plan.
“I’ve always loved coming to the Gold Coast, we always holidayed here. And one bitterly cold Melbourne day I just came home to my husband and said ‘I’m done’.
“We arrived here just weeks before Covid kicked in and we’ve thanked our lucky stars ever since.
“I just love it here. I feel like I’m finally home … and I feel like I can really be of service to this community.
“I’d love to start a Women Sport Gold Coast chapter, it’s a big responsibility but it seems like now is the perfect time.”
Once again, Carol is at the right place at the right time.
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