‘My sister-in-law refused to babysit my kids, then did something unforgivable’
“I wouldn’t trust her around my kids after that…”
Family Life
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Finding the perfect babysitter is no easy task, and once you have your hands on someone great, the last thing you want is to let them go.
Mary* and her sister-in-law, Carla*, have had a babysitting arrangement between themselves for years; since the pandemic, Mary will watch over Carla’s kids three days a week, and Carla will do the same for Mary’s kids.
Everything has been hunky dory for the relatives for over three years, but a recent argument has thrown a serious spanner into the works.
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My SIL threatened to call the police if I didn’t pick up the kids
The argument was big enough for Carla and Mary to avoid speaking for a few days, but despite their bickering, Mary believed their babysitting arrangement was still in the clear.
Weeks after their big spat, Mary drove her kids to Carla’s house and let them out of the car.
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“I didn't speak to my sister-in-law because when one of us is in a rush like I was, it's standard for us to just let the kids out, stay in the car, and drive off when you see the door open,” Mary explained in the Reddit post.
Forty minutes after dropping the kids off, while Mary was driving to her work, she started receiving missed calls from her SIL.
“When I got there, I had about 20 missed calls, and even more texts, all from my sister-in-law, all saying she didn't want to watch the kids given our argument,” she said.
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As Mary was busy with work, she didn’t get the chance to read the barrage of texts Carla was sending to her.
“I rang her, said I'll arrange to work from home, then come get the kids,” she said. Then Carla told her if she wasn’t home in the next 45 minutes, “she would call the police.”
Mary quickly arranged to work from home for the rest of the day, but before she could get out of the office, her boss required her to do “a few things” which delayed her by a further 20 minutes.
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“When I got back to my sister-in-law's, just over an hour later, she said she'd already called the police when the 45 [minutes] ran out,” Mary said, shocked
But Carla wouldn’t actually call the police, right? Wrong.
By the time Mary showed up to collect her kids, the police were there waiting. “I then had to stick around long enough to tell the officer that I didn't abandon my children, there was just a communication issue,” she said.
To say Mary was angry at her SIL for calling the police was an understatement.
“I work with kids,” Mary said. “If I got ‘child abandonment’ on my record, I would never work in my field again.”
And this is something Carla knew, but she still decided to get the police involved, which spurred an enormous “shouting match” between the two sisters.
“She said that if I checked my phone, talked to her that morning, or came back when I was supposed to, she would not have needed to call the police,” Mary said.
“...and I did this to myself, as she gave me a warning with that first text and I could have checked my phone or spoken to her directly when I got to her place, all of which she says she would have done if she were in my position, given that we'd argued the night before.”
Since the awkward encounter, Calra has since apologised to Mary for calling the police on her and asked if their babysitting arrangement was still in place. Fat chance!
“I've told her that if she thinks I'm babysitting for her, she's f**king delusional, and she's on her own,” Mary said. However, without a solid babysitter in place, it looks like Carla and her husband will have to find somewhere cheaper to live, where they have closer access to a babysitter.
“My mother and brother have both called me an a**ehole because there were no consequences to her calling the police,” Mary said. “And that while she overreacted, she's apologised, so if I really forgive her, I'll let us move on.”
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“She nuked her relationship with you, she nuked her relationship with your kids”
The Reddit community couldn’t fathom how anyone could blame Mary for the situation when she wasn’t the one who called the police on another family member.
“The only delusional person here is SIL,” a person wrote.
“Who calls the police on an essential worker out of spite? Let her struggle to find childcare or lose her job. You could have easily lost yours.”
“Right?” another agreed. “[Mary’s mum] said that sister calling the parents wasn't an issue because [Mary] didn't face consequences, but SIL intended [Mary] to face massive consequences.”
“What on earth was she thinking?” a common tread. “That she could be a baby about things and there would be no consequences?”
“Don't let her reel you back in,” someone advised.
“She still blames you for her calling the police, which means she isn't sorry and would do it again. Her losing you as a babysitter is a consequence of her actions.”
“I wouldn’t trust her around my kids after that,” another chimed in.
“And what if the cops had pressed charges?” asked a person.
“What if you had lost your kids? She does not understand the ramifications of what could have happened. She nuked her relationship with you; she nuked her relationship with your kids and has to accept that.”
*Names have been changed
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Originally published as ‘My sister-in-law refused to babysit my kids, then did something unforgivable’