‘My 11-year-old daughter’s friends are texting nudes… I don’t know what to do’

“The girls were using code words and thinking they were being secretive, but it was so obvious what was happening,” the worried dad reveals.

Paul was out for dinner with his stepdaughter and her friends.

The 11-year-old girls were having a sleepover and he thought he’d take them out for a meal.

But as they were eating, the girls’ discussion turned strange, with code words and miming - Paul realised something sinister was happening.

“My daughter’s friends thought they were being secretive and tried to ‘code word’ and mime about a text one had received from a classmate asking for nude pictures,” Paul said in a Reddit post.

“I immediately shut dinner down and brought them back home (it was a sleepover).”

Paul had a “stern talk” with his daughter while the other girls were in a tent he’d set up.

“I am planning on speaking with all the parents about what I found out but don’t want to lose the trust of my own kiddo if any major repercussions happen.”

He came to the Reddit community seeking advice.

Should he take the matter outside his own family and talk to the other parents? Should he just make sure his daughter was well-versed on what could happen if she shared nude photos of herself online?

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The girls were discussing a request for nude photos from a boy at school. Photo: iStock

Reddit responds to kids’ texting nude photos

The community thought Paul was doing the right thing bringing the matter to light.

One young person said they wished they’d had more guidance when they were growing up online.

“As a zoomer child who had access to the internet and a bunch of messaging and photo sharing apps by the time I was in middle school, I wish one of my parents would have had a conversation with me about online safety, specifically related to nude photos and sexual content from real people,” they said.

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One person said Paul shouldn’t worry about the trust issue because one day his daughter would understand.

“I think in the long run you’re better off bringing it to light,” they said. “Your kid will look back on it and think, ‘My dad cared enough to put a stop to it’ and not, ‘It was happening and my dad was too oblivious to even notice’.”

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One person said Paul should be careful with his approach.

“I think this is an opportunity to educate and not to punish,” they said. “Make it clear that if despite your warnings, your daughter and her friends ever make a mistake and share inappropriate stuff online or meet up with someone and something bad happens, they will never be in trouble if they come to you. Strict parents make sneaky kids. This is the time to set boundaries and education, not punish and dominate.”

Originally published as ‘My 11-year-old daughter’s friends are texting nudes… I don’t know what to do’