‘I made my husband miss his mate’s baby’s first bday; I’m way more important’

“I know the first birthday is a big deal, but I wouldn’t be able to take care of myself … it’s not like the baby’s going anywhere.”

It’s been a few weeks since Claire* broke her arm after falling off a ladder in her home.

The 26-year-old has been in agony ever since; anyone who has suffered the same injuries understands the difficulty of broken limbs.

Unable to work, cook or even dress herself, she requires a lot of help from her husband, Paul*, but when he’s not there, she’s left unable to fend for herself.

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Claire can't believe she was left to fend for herself with a broken bone. Picture: iStock

“You have no idea how difficult it is with a broken bone”

“[I] need a lot of help with daily tasks,” she explained on Reddit. 

Since her husband works full time, whenever he’s at the office, Claire can only rely on her sister, who is a stay-at-home mum, to help out. 

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Typically, broken bones aren't a permanent injury, so Claire knew it would only be for a few weeks before returning to her normal life and routine, but for the time being, she was stuck.

So when Paul received an invitation to his best friend’s baby’s first birthday party, she was curious why he agreed to attend. 

His friend “lives in a different town”, which is “about a 3.5-hour drive away,” she explained. In order to get there, “he would have to leave early in the morning and come back late at night”.

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To make matters worse, the party was slated to take part on Saturday - the only day that Claire’s sister is completely unavailable to help out. “[Saturday] is my sister’s busiest day, as she has to take her kids to their various activities and run errands,” Claire said. “So she’d basically be out of the house the entire day.”

With her sister’s availability out the window and the possibility of her husband not being home all day and night, Claire was left feeling uncared for. 

But rather than keep these feelings to herself, she informed her husband of her expectations. “I knew there was no way she could take care of me, so I told my husband he needed to miss the party,” she said. 

Safe to say, Paul wasn’t pleased about being asked to skip his best friend’s baby’s first birthday, and while Claire “knows the first birthday is a big deal”, she just can’t justify him leaving the house while she’s in this current state. 

“I wouldn’t be able to take care of myself or do anything for the entire day,” she tried to reason with him, instead offering an alternative to attending the first birthday party. 

“I said he could always visit them after I got better; it’s not like the baby’s going anywhere,” she said. “A birthday party is just a superficial event and is by no means absolutely necessary.”

Paul was “pretty upset” by his wife’s demands and spoke to his best mate about the decision, a conversation that Claire couldn’t help but overhear. 

“I overheard his conversation with his friend, and he was pretty p**sed about it, too,” Claire said. “The thing is, his friend had never broken a bone before, so he had no idea how difficult it was just to get through the day.”

Despite everyone she spoke to disagreeing with her position, Claire still didn’t understand the issue. Even when she talked to her sister, who labelled the act “awful”, the 26yo just couldn’t grasp why her behaviour was so unjustified. 

“I really don’t see why it’s such a huge deal?” she said. “Maybe it‘s because I don’t have kids, but I don’t see why missing a birthday party is such a terrible thing, especially given the circumstances.”

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“You need to get a grip”

Online, everyone agreed that Claire was acting like a child and refused to entertain the idea that she couldn’t spend one day by herself. 

“I have never seen someone with just a broken arm require a round-the-clock caregiver. You're 26, not 94,” a comment read.

“When I broke my arm, my husband worked, and I took care of my two toddlers all day,” a mother chimed in. 

Others gave her a much-needed reality check. 

“You should be able to spend a Saturday without needing to work, cook, drive, or change your clothes,” another wrote. 

“Get changed into comfy clothes you can wear all day in the morning, and spend the day binge-watching Netflix or something. People do it all the time, even when they're not injured.”

“Mate, you have a broken arm; you need to get a grip,” a parent added. “My 10-year-old nephew managed life with his broken arm more maturely and independently than you have.”

*Names have been changed

Originally published as ‘I made my husband miss his mate’s baby’s first bday; I’m way more important’