Can’t get enough of the Coldplay cheating scandal? You’re not alone

The recent Coldplay “cheating” scandal has exposed a trend sweeping social media – but at what cost to those “caught in the act”?

Cheating scandals have always been top tier gossip fodder, but the response to the Coldplay ‘kiss cam’ affair has exposed a wild “cheating” trend that is blowing up marriages.

Andy Byron, the married CEO of software company Astronomer, resigned from his high-flying tech role after being publicly outed for seemingly having a fling with his co-worker Kristin Cabot.

Meanwhile Ms Cabot, who is also married, is currently on leave from her HR manager job.

But it’s not just their careers taking a hit, with the pair likely both facing the music at home after being caught together at the Gillette Stadium near Boston, in the US, on Wednesday night.

The very public fall out from the viral moment has become a global topic of conversation, so huge that one person even lied about being Mr Byron’s daughter, presumably to cash in on the ferocious appetite for new information on the sorry affair.

But the act of straying while in a committed relationship is nothing new, in fact the culture of infidelity dates back to when civilisation first began – so what is it about this particular case that has the whole world hooked?

To date, the original video – posted by fellow concertgoer Grace Springer – has been viewed over 30 million times, with thousands of reshares also clocking up staggeringly high figures.

But it’s what happens in the 15-second clip that holds the secret to why everyone is so obsessed, Melbourne psychologist Carly Dober explains.

Why we’re so obsessed with the Coldplay ‘cheating’ scandal

“This story has all the elements of drama and spectacle,” she told news.com.au.

“The initial video is quite comedic even when you don’t know the background of the people, so this would arguably have been somewhat of a viral moment anyway.

“Then the background story of the attendees makes it so much more dramatic, with a high profile CEO allegedly engaging in this behaviour with a colleague.”

Ms Dober, the clinic owner at Enriching Lives Psychology, said the fact that infidelity touches many people’s lives at some point will have played a part in the public’s obsession with the story.

“Many people have been hurt by, engaged in, or know someone who has been cheated on, so it is a tale many people are familiar with,” she explained.

“But with the added spectacle of a CEO losing their job for this behaviour, it feels a lot more high stakes than other videos that have gone viral.

“People are also highly curious and the clip evokes a number of different feelings, ‘Would I be able to predict if this was my partner?’, ‘What if this happens to me?’

“It touches on some very vulnerable thoughts people might have.”

Andy Byron and Kristin Cabot were caught allegedly cheating on the kisscam at a Coldplay concert in Boston. Picture: TikTok

Melbourne psychologist Carly Dober explained why the whole world is obsessed with the apparent affair. Picture: Supplied

Lauren Muratore, an accredited psychosexual therapist from Melbourne, agrees stating that stories of adultery resonate because they touch deep psychological nerves.

“Cheating is just a phenomenon that people are very interested with as a lot of people have been cheated on or have cheated on somebody, not everyone, but evidence says approximately 30 to 70 per cent of people have engaged in infidelity. So if that’s the case, such a global story will touch us and bring up some feelings,” she told news.com.au.

The director of the Integrated Sex + Relationship clinic went on to explain that cheating scandals activate innate fears around abandonment, broken trust and betrayal.

“To be so publicly exposed, that would have felt quite awful, and I guess the viewer is watching that and tapping into how they’re feeling about that, then also making a judgment.”

Interestingly, both Ms Dober and Ms Muratore noted that “the moment would’ve likely been forgotten and maybe not even spoken about had they just played it cool”, but it was their panicked reactions that made the video so compelling.

Wild ‘cheating’ trend blowing up marriages

The clip’s popularity also exposes a wild “cheating” trend that has been booming in popularity recently, which sees social media users outing strangers whom they’ve seemingly caught in the act.

The Coldplay ‘kiss cam’ cheating scandal is the latest in a long line of videos that have clocked up millions of views by those who post them.

But the clips, some of which often promote a virtual witch-hunt as internet sleuths attempt to identify the “cheaters” involved, also simultaneously destroy marriages and relationships in the process – and this is often forgotten or ignored by those in the public domain.

“Being exposed like this can leave the person who has been betrayed feeling embarrassed and publicly humiliated,” Ms Dober explained.

“Knowing your partner is not respecting you and their relationship can be awfully difficult to deal with, but even more so when everyone on the internet knows your business.

“We also don’t know the mental health and emotional resilience levels of the person who is filmed which could have dangerous consequences.”

Kiss cam victim speaks out

Deyvi Andrade, who was outed for cheating on a kiss cam while attending the Barcelona soccer match against Delfin in January 2020, spoke previously about the havoc the viral footage of him locking lips with another woman caused.

“You don’t know the psychological damage you have caused with your hatred directed at me,” Mr Andrade said after the widely-criticised moment amassed millions of views.

“I hope you never have to be in my position.

“I am really sorry and this is why I’ve come out in public to comment on this nonsense, so I can ask (my partner) to forgive me.”

Why we’re angry at those who get caught

Outrage surrounding these moments, including that now infamous clip of Mr Byron and Ms Cabot, also highlights societal expectations surrounding monogamy.

“There are definitely still very strong social expectations about appropriate behaviour in monogamous relationships,” Ms Dober told news.com.au.

“People are also naturally very curious about other peoples relationships, especially when they can be something so fundamentally hurtful such as.

“Those who have stepped outside their relationship may also find the story very interesting and consider how they would respond if their cheating was shared at this scale.”

Lauren Muratore, an accredited psychosexual therapist from Melbourne, said the experience would have been 'awful' and can add to the trauma. Picture: Supplied

Grace Springer (right) pictured at the Coldplay gig before she caught the awkward moment of Andy Byron with Kristin Cabot on the kiss cam. Picture: Instagram

While the debacle as been undeniably entertaining, the experts urge people to remember the people not in the video who have been affected, such as the extended family and their significant others.

“I’ve seen many cases where this sort of a ‘witch hunt’, actually is part of the trauma for the person who was deceived,” Ms Muratore said.

“That’s a really, really awful thing to go through. And you know, does the truth set us free? Do these people want to know the information? Is it right? These are all such massive moral dilemmas to consider when exposing a cheater.”

Ms Springer has since spoken out about her guilt surrounding the global reaction to her video, stating, “a part of me feels bad for turning these people’s lives upside down”.

“I had no idea who the couple was. Just thought I caught an interesting reaction to the kiss cam and decided to post it,” she said.

“I hope their partners can heal from this and get a second chance at the happiness they deserve with their future still in front of them.”

Originally published as Can’t get enough of the Coldplay cheating scandal? You’re not alone